23
Mother-in-law was going to give us an apartment from the last century, threatening a divorce husband and standing on his own.
What to do if you visit often mother-in-law comes Visit? It all depends on personal attitude and banal upbringing. If the relationship with the mother of the husband, in general, good, you can just talk to her and find out the reason for such frequent visits. Otherwise, it is always possible to turn off the phone and not approach the door. I didn't hear the call.
The problem gets worse if your mother-in-law always knows exactly when you are at home. It will be difficult to avoid her visits. You will either have to change the apartment or find out the relationship. And this, statistically, almost always leads to more and more conflicts. Getting out of this situation will not be so easy.
Immediately I want to ask all readers to understand me correctly and not to make loud statements. I believe that life is given to us alone and we need to live it comfortably, if it does not bother anyone. That is, my dear ones, of course, it is necessary to live in such a way that there are no excesses in either side. Maintaining a balance between work and rest. So that conscience does not torment at night.
Now to the point. I'm 21, my husband is 23. We got married about a year ago and now we are living an adult life, as always. My husband works at a consulting firm. I go to school and do some work at home. But, of course, there is not enough money. And all because the lion’s share goes to communal and rent.
Let me tell you a little bit about myself. All my life I lived with my parents and younger brother in a two-bedroom apartment, which was bought in the early nineties. We never had enough space. Yes, and repair in Khrushchev, you know, nothing, does not particularly affect. As they say “from the rotten forest for a short time hut” or what other sayings there are. In general, I dreamed of a beautiful apartment since childhood.
In fact, we pay so much for housing. New building, high ceilings, brick walls. A floor that even feels good to wash. And big, bright windows. A place that brings pleasure, but takes away your last penny. What can I do?
I have always known that my mother-in-law lives and works abroad. I don’t know how much they pay her, but in 17 years, you can already save for anything. And my husband is her only son. So for the wedding, I expected to get at least a one-bedroom apartment from her as a gift. Preferably in a neighboring, actively developing area. Many of my friends dream of living there, including.
But no, my parents gave us money, and my mother-in-law also decided to hand us a tentacle envelope. A relatively small amount, if anything. Igor and I didn’t even know how to spend it. So we decided to just put it in the bank, maybe later it will be useful. That's pretty much it.
As time passed, I noticed that as a family, we stopped moving forward. The husband's salary is enough only to pay for housing and buy food for a month. Maybe he's also spending something on gas. I pay for everything else. And I spend almost half of my income on that. That's not acceptable to me.
Now to the main thing. It’s the second month since I’ve been in position. Nerves gone, fear of the unknown, too. I calmed down and my husband and I decided to share the news with our family. To which my mother-in-law said that for the sake of such a business she is ready to provide us young people with a good apartment. The time has come, so soon we won’t have to pay that much money. That's great!
Imagine that. I took the day off, asked my best friend, a busy, knowledgeable person, by the way, to come with me, to watch apartments in that new neighborhood. We ran around so many floors, can't count. The options are the sea. I didn’t want to leave two or three apartments. They were so cool. But it's time and it's fun.
After talking to Igor, we decided that we would not put too much pressure on his mother. Too luxurious options were immediately removed from the list, since we are still young, we will earn our own. But there's no shack for us either. Therefore, a nice two-bedroom apartment with a covered parking space will suit us. And we will buy the equipment ourselves. I think it would be fair.
And so, me and the cake, beautiful, scented, come to visit the father-in-law. She welcomes us joyfully, takes out some fruit, candy. She says she's done everything she's done and she wanted to call us in advance. Looking at our mute, incomprehensible look, she clarifies: the apartment has already been chosen, the seller is her good friend, and part-time former neighbor moving to Israel.
In general, this is an apartment on the ninth floor, in the next entrance. Two rooms, no repairs, panel walls, last floor. There's an elevator, old neighbors too. There's a road and a tram junction. 20 minutes to the center by car.
I didn’t even know how tears were coming from my eyes. My husband saved me: he said that because of hormones, I have this, lately, often happens. And then the hormones actually worked and I started shaking. I calmed down only ten minutes later, going out with my husband on the balcony. He hugged me and stroked my hair, trying to comfort me. And I saw only perennial pits on the pavement and thought that now this landscape will be outside my window too.
At home, even in a rented apartment, I calmed down. I took a bath, put on relaxing music, lit candles. I think the stress has gone. And even though I felt terrible somewhere inside, I had to talk to Igor.
I realized he wasn't going to argue with his mother. It is not necessary to wait for an adequate solution from both of them. So I gathered all my confidence and, if you will, impudence in my fist, and gave him an ultimatum. Or we move to another, normal apartment, in a normal area where you can and want to live. Or divorce.
I want everyone to understand me correctly. I can't live in those conditions. Accordingly, the child will also be ill. Then why even start a family? Did my mother-in-law want to save money on her own son? It's her decision. I made my decision to my husband. And bargaining for a normal, normal life is below my dignity.
So far, my husband says he'll sort it out. But it's been a few days. I understand he doesn't want to upset his mom. However, myself, and even in the situation, I will not offend. Then he will be grateful. I think now you just have to be strong to get your way. In the future, we will visit each other again. With joy and a smile.
I don't mind seeing those pits on the road again. But only on the condition that after that I will return to a good apartment with repairs, air conditioning and everything. Only one way or another. Period.
The problem gets worse if your mother-in-law always knows exactly when you are at home. It will be difficult to avoid her visits. You will either have to change the apartment or find out the relationship. And this, statistically, almost always leads to more and more conflicts. Getting out of this situation will not be so easy.
Immediately I want to ask all readers to understand me correctly and not to make loud statements. I believe that life is given to us alone and we need to live it comfortably, if it does not bother anyone. That is, my dear ones, of course, it is necessary to live in such a way that there are no excesses in either side. Maintaining a balance between work and rest. So that conscience does not torment at night.
Now to the point. I'm 21, my husband is 23. We got married about a year ago and now we are living an adult life, as always. My husband works at a consulting firm. I go to school and do some work at home. But, of course, there is not enough money. And all because the lion’s share goes to communal and rent.
Let me tell you a little bit about myself. All my life I lived with my parents and younger brother in a two-bedroom apartment, which was bought in the early nineties. We never had enough space. Yes, and repair in Khrushchev, you know, nothing, does not particularly affect. As they say “from the rotten forest for a short time hut” or what other sayings there are. In general, I dreamed of a beautiful apartment since childhood.
In fact, we pay so much for housing. New building, high ceilings, brick walls. A floor that even feels good to wash. And big, bright windows. A place that brings pleasure, but takes away your last penny. What can I do?
I have always known that my mother-in-law lives and works abroad. I don’t know how much they pay her, but in 17 years, you can already save for anything. And my husband is her only son. So for the wedding, I expected to get at least a one-bedroom apartment from her as a gift. Preferably in a neighboring, actively developing area. Many of my friends dream of living there, including.
But no, my parents gave us money, and my mother-in-law also decided to hand us a tentacle envelope. A relatively small amount, if anything. Igor and I didn’t even know how to spend it. So we decided to just put it in the bank, maybe later it will be useful. That's pretty much it.
As time passed, I noticed that as a family, we stopped moving forward. The husband's salary is enough only to pay for housing and buy food for a month. Maybe he's also spending something on gas. I pay for everything else. And I spend almost half of my income on that. That's not acceptable to me.
Now to the main thing. It’s the second month since I’ve been in position. Nerves gone, fear of the unknown, too. I calmed down and my husband and I decided to share the news with our family. To which my mother-in-law said that for the sake of such a business she is ready to provide us young people with a good apartment. The time has come, so soon we won’t have to pay that much money. That's great!
Imagine that. I took the day off, asked my best friend, a busy, knowledgeable person, by the way, to come with me, to watch apartments in that new neighborhood. We ran around so many floors, can't count. The options are the sea. I didn’t want to leave two or three apartments. They were so cool. But it's time and it's fun.
After talking to Igor, we decided that we would not put too much pressure on his mother. Too luxurious options were immediately removed from the list, since we are still young, we will earn our own. But there's no shack for us either. Therefore, a nice two-bedroom apartment with a covered parking space will suit us. And we will buy the equipment ourselves. I think it would be fair.
And so, me and the cake, beautiful, scented, come to visit the father-in-law. She welcomes us joyfully, takes out some fruit, candy. She says she's done everything she's done and she wanted to call us in advance. Looking at our mute, incomprehensible look, she clarifies: the apartment has already been chosen, the seller is her good friend, and part-time former neighbor moving to Israel.
In general, this is an apartment on the ninth floor, in the next entrance. Two rooms, no repairs, panel walls, last floor. There's an elevator, old neighbors too. There's a road and a tram junction. 20 minutes to the center by car.
I didn’t even know how tears were coming from my eyes. My husband saved me: he said that because of hormones, I have this, lately, often happens. And then the hormones actually worked and I started shaking. I calmed down only ten minutes later, going out with my husband on the balcony. He hugged me and stroked my hair, trying to comfort me. And I saw only perennial pits on the pavement and thought that now this landscape will be outside my window too.
At home, even in a rented apartment, I calmed down. I took a bath, put on relaxing music, lit candles. I think the stress has gone. And even though I felt terrible somewhere inside, I had to talk to Igor.
I realized he wasn't going to argue with his mother. It is not necessary to wait for an adequate solution from both of them. So I gathered all my confidence and, if you will, impudence in my fist, and gave him an ultimatum. Or we move to another, normal apartment, in a normal area where you can and want to live. Or divorce.
I want everyone to understand me correctly. I can't live in those conditions. Accordingly, the child will also be ill. Then why even start a family? Did my mother-in-law want to save money on her own son? It's her decision. I made my decision to my husband. And bargaining for a normal, normal life is below my dignity.
So far, my husband says he'll sort it out. But it's been a few days. I understand he doesn't want to upset his mom. However, myself, and even in the situation, I will not offend. Then he will be grateful. I think now you just have to be strong to get your way. In the future, we will visit each other again. With joy and a smile.
I don't mind seeing those pits on the road again. But only on the condition that after that I will return to a good apartment with repairs, air conditioning and everything. Only one way or another. Period.
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