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Peace in relationships: 3 main components
Twenty seven million four hundred seventy five thousand two hundred thirty seven
Relationship as a couple is a closed space, the system, because changing even one member will result in movement of the entire system. The following are the three main components, which are able to cultivate peace in your relationship.
1. The balance of the emotions/mind.
One of the most important skills in a relationship is to quickly switch from rational to emotional and Vice versa.
And for women more important skill to switch from the emotional to the rational. For example, anxiety is a huge emotional eater more energy. In order for it to prevent, it makes sense to learn to quickly translate the emotions flow in a logical direction. The simplest way is to ask yourself the question: "What exactly will change on my concern?"or "how can I help/influence in this situation?". When logic prevails, emotions often disappear, so you can do that with any excessive expression of feelings — jealousy, resentment, regret.
For men, on the contrary, it is important to switch to the area of the emotions when they after work or meeting friends back in the space of relations. From emotional intensity depends on the quality of time spent together and involvement in a common emotional space.
2. Balance to take/give.
Relationships require engagement and "contributions" in the form of attention, action and time. But it is very important to learn to feel the balance and not give more than until the other partner has not made its share of time, attention, action.
It is very important in such cases not requiring you to discuss your needs and relax for a while surrounded by the care, time, attention. Instead, it makes sense to devote this time to yourself, that is their own "fill in" the amount in arrears. This action will remove the tension, because the one who made a great contribution, and now expects "interest" back. It is unfair that the initiators of consumerism in relationships be kind and giving, not those who used to consume.
3. The boundaries of the individual.
It is the habit of "fill yourself" is not only the cause of restoring the balance of give/take, and encroachment on another's territory. When a person is not filled, he is inclined to take the missing from the other. Quick and relatively safe to do this with a loved one, that is the most open and vulnerable.
Therefore, it is important dialogue about how much time each partner you need for yourself. It is also important pronunciation boundaries that may eventually change, so it makes sense to clearly understand their needs: what of your time, attention, and actions leading to the strengthening of the common emotional space, and where the violation of personal boundaries of each of the partners.
As a close partner, any person will be returned to their needs. From the comfort of the internal state depends on a favorable climate in the pair, concern and respect in the relationship. published
Author: Elena Osokina
P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©
Source: osokina.com.ua
Relationship as a couple is a closed space, the system, because changing even one member will result in movement of the entire system. The following are the three main components, which are able to cultivate peace in your relationship.
1. The balance of the emotions/mind.
One of the most important skills in a relationship is to quickly switch from rational to emotional and Vice versa.
And for women more important skill to switch from the emotional to the rational. For example, anxiety is a huge emotional eater more energy. In order for it to prevent, it makes sense to learn to quickly translate the emotions flow in a logical direction. The simplest way is to ask yourself the question: "What exactly will change on my concern?"or "how can I help/influence in this situation?". When logic prevails, emotions often disappear, so you can do that with any excessive expression of feelings — jealousy, resentment, regret.
For men, on the contrary, it is important to switch to the area of the emotions when they after work or meeting friends back in the space of relations. From emotional intensity depends on the quality of time spent together and involvement in a common emotional space.
2. Balance to take/give.
Relationships require engagement and "contributions" in the form of attention, action and time. But it is very important to learn to feel the balance and not give more than until the other partner has not made its share of time, attention, action.
It is very important in such cases not requiring you to discuss your needs and relax for a while surrounded by the care, time, attention. Instead, it makes sense to devote this time to yourself, that is their own "fill in" the amount in arrears. This action will remove the tension, because the one who made a great contribution, and now expects "interest" back. It is unfair that the initiators of consumerism in relationships be kind and giving, not those who used to consume.
3. The boundaries of the individual.
It is the habit of "fill yourself" is not only the cause of restoring the balance of give/take, and encroachment on another's territory. When a person is not filled, he is inclined to take the missing from the other. Quick and relatively safe to do this with a loved one, that is the most open and vulnerable.
Therefore, it is important dialogue about how much time each partner you need for yourself. It is also important pronunciation boundaries that may eventually change, so it makes sense to clearly understand their needs: what of your time, attention, and actions leading to the strengthening of the common emotional space, and where the violation of personal boundaries of each of the partners.
As a close partner, any person will be returned to their needs. From the comfort of the internal state depends on a favorable climate in the pair, concern and respect in the relationship. published
Author: Elena Osokina
P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©
Source: osokina.com.ua
