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The day I no longer rush
When you live a crazy life, every minute counts. Always I feel that you should consult the list and run somewhere. And no matter how you tried to allocate their time and attention, and how many different problems they try to solve - you still will not have enough time to do everything.
Such was my life for two crazy years. My thoughts and actions are controlled by electronic notification and jam-packed schedule. And although every fiber of my heart I would like to find time for all cases in my overloaded plane, I could not get it.
But 6 years ago dawned on me the blessing in the face of calm, carefree, stop-and-smell-rose baby.
When I had to leave, she began to look shiny crown in my bag. When I needed to be somewhere five minutes ago, it required to fasten her toy animals to the seat of the car. When I had a quick lunch in the cafe, she suddenly stopped to talk with an elderly woman who looked like her grandmother. When I was thirty minutes to reach somewhere, she He asked me to stop the wheelchair, to caress every dog we passed. When my day was completely painted, starting at 6 am, she asked me to break eggs and very slowly and carefully began to stir them into the bowl.
Whenever my child made me deviate from the schedule, I had an excuse: «We do not have time for it»
I started with these suggestions:
Come soon, we're late. em>
And ends offer them:
We all miss if you do not hurry em>.
I start my day with them:
Hurry up and eat your breakfast. Hurry up and get dressed. em>
I ended the day by them:
Hurry brush your teeth. Hurry go to bed. Em>
Although the word "quickly" and "hurry up" little or no way affect the speed of my child, I told them anyway. Even more than the words "I love you».
The truth hurts, but the truth is ... treats and helps me to become a mother, which I want to be.
But one day everything changed. We took my eldest daughter from kindergarten, come home and out of the car. This was not as fast as I would like my elder, and she said to her little sister: "What do you sluggish!" And when she crossed her arms and angrily breath, I saw it myself - and it was a heartbreaking sight .
I constantly pressed, pushed and hurried small child who just wanted to enjoy life.
I opened my eyes. And I suddenly saw clearly what harm my hurried existence causes both my children.
My voice was trembling, I looked into the eyes of my baby and said: "I'm so sorry that I made you all the time to hurry. I like that you're not in a hurry, and I want to be the same as you are ».
Both daughters looked at me, and his face shone younger approval and understanding.
"I promise to be more patient," - I said and hugged his curly little girl who beamed at the unexpected promise of his mother.
Remove from your vocabulary the word "hurry" was pretty easy. It is much harder to be patient to wait for my child leisurely. To help both of us, I started to give her a little more time to get ready, when we had to go somewhere. But sometimes, in spite of this, we will still be late. Then I persuaded myself that I will be late only these few years, while it is still small.
When my daughter and I walked and walked into the store, I let her set the pace. And when she stopped to admire something, I cast thought about my plans out of your head and just watched her. I noticed her expression, of which I had never seen before. I studied the dimples on her hands and the way her eyes squints while smiling. I saw how other people respond when she stops to talk to them. I watched as she learns interesting insects and beautiful flowers. She was a spectator, and I realized that contemplatives in our crazy world - a rare and amazing gifts. My daughter was a gift for my restless soul.
I gave promise to slow down almost three years ago. And until now, I have to make considerable efforts to live in slow motion, not to be distracted by the daily hustle and bustle and pay attention to what's really important. Fortunately, my youngest daughter constantly reminds me of this.
Once while on vacation we had to ride a bike for ice cream. Having bought popsicles, my daughter sat down at a table near the tent, admiring admiring the ice tower in her hand. Suddenly her face appeared anxiety: "I have to hurry, Mother?»
I almost cried. Perhaps scars last hurried life will never disappear completely, I thought sadly.
And while my child looked at me, trying to figure out whether you want to rush her now, I realized that I now have a choice. I could sit and sad, thinking about how much time I customized it ... or I could celebrate the fact that today I try to do differently.
I decided to live for today.
"No need to rush. Just take your time, "- I said softly. Her face brightened instantly, and shoulders relaxed.
And so we sat side by side, talking about what they are talking about playing the ukulele 6-year-olds. There were even times when we sat in silence, just smiling at each other, enjoying the surroundings and the sounds around us.
I thought that my baby was going to eat every last drop, but when she got almost to the end, she handed me a spoon full of ice crystals and the sweet juice. "I kept the last spoon for you, mom," - said my daughter proud.
I realized that I had just made a deal of a lifetime.
I gave my child a little time ... and in return she gave me her last spoonful and recalled that the taste becomes sweeter, and love often comes when you stop so-carried through life.
And now, whether ...
... Eating fruit ice;
... Picking flowers;
... Putting on a seatbelt;
... Breaking eggs;
... Search for seashells;
... Viewing ladybugs;
... Or just walk ...
I will not say: "We do not have time for this!" Because, in essence, that means: «We have no time to live»
Stop and enjoy the simple pleasures of everyday life - it means to live in the present.
Believe me, I learned this from the world's leading experts on the joys of life.
Author: Rachel Macy Stafford
Translation: anna-psy
See also: Habits are very happy people
Rules of Life Moomin
5 most common regrets
via www.adme.ru/psihologiya/5-samyh-rasprostranionnyh-sozhalenij-412205/