I got burned in my first marriage, and now I'm wondering if I should get married at all.

Growing up is part of life. A time when you need to learn independence, success, responsibility and hard work. Only then can anyone really come out of it. self-sufficient. But the irony is, if it were that simple, we as a society would be much more successful than we are now. So what's stopping us?! The answer is simple: individual problems and personal problems.



Someone can't make money. Someone has a fundamental aversion to starting a family. Some people don’t see themselves as parents and talk about it. Well, what can you do, not really force. The public today does not blame anyone for this, at least we do not accept it. They say in China, yes. These issues are treated a little differently. But how to determine who is right and who is not in this situation? People living as they want? Or are they trying to live as the state demands?

I first got married when I was 19. She was young, naive. But it came out, you could say, for love, too. Although, 90 percent of my actions were actually directed from my mom's side, yes. Jacob was not a bad man. He was also young and inexperienced in many things. I tried to sit on two chairs: I listened to my mother’s advice and tried to obey my husband in everything. And nothing good came of it. However, it was clear from the beginning.

Naturally, my mother did not like the fact that my young husband was very far from some of the realities of life. Imagine, when he came after a day at work, he didn’t want to just change clothes and hammer nails into the wall or make something in the garage like his father. That's the news. And for this reason, my mother often called us and expressed her displeasure. In short, she went where she shouldn't have gone.



On the other hand, Jacob was not a saint either. At first, we lived like a movie. Walking, courtship even after the wedding, gifts. But then, gradually, the husband began to turn into a typical man who just hit the wall with his forehead. He had a job, but climbing up the career ladder somehow did not arise. Lying on the couch or meeting with friends, he was not against, but otherwise - pass. Well, you know men like that.

Our divorce was not long in coming. We've held out for two years, even though a well-known writer claims that true love lives a year longer. Fortunately, we didn’t have enough children. I'd be the only one in that case. Oh, it's not easy. I started living in the same apartment as before.



It’s been 12 years and I’m still there. I wouldn’t even notice it if it wasn’t for a friend who gave birth to a second child. And she's a year and a half younger than me, like that. How is it that over time I have disappointed my parents and never had a serious relationship? I think my first and only marriage left its mark, that's for sure. And otherwise... I just didn't get my hands on it.

At the moment, I am in a good position and financially independent. The apartment I got from my parents has been renovated up and down. I might even move somewhere else, but I really like the neighborhood and the magic of an old house with high ceilings. And the pictures on social media are just amazing. Seriously!

I go on vacation every six months. That's right, by the standards of girls talking about their type of successful life. Traveling is relatively and not expensive. So I don't see any special merit in that. I bought a car and got my license. On the contrary, I had to deal with my rights first. I am the first person in my family to drive a car. I can ride my dad, even though he always refuses. I follow my diet and I try to be athletic. Well, that's just girl standards. It has nothing to do with my celibacy.



So tell me, why do I need a man, except for occasional meetings, so to speak, to improve my health? To pick up socks behind him or listen to his snoring and other often-published male sounds? No, thank you. Maybe it's about children? Well, I admit I've been thinking about that, too. But I came to rather contradictory conclusions.

Take the same friend of mine. She now has two children. Which means even more bags under the eyes and deposits on the sides. Vika, and I know her well, doesn't seem like a happy woman to me. Moreover, I only see a smile in front of her when I tell her about some news or brag about shopping. With regard to her husband, she has only sad sighs and even her own children do not bring her joy. I can see that, no one's going to convince me, not even Vic herself.



And even if in the future her children will grow up and will not constantly cry and demand attention, what next? They will learn, grow up, go to live somewhere else and from there begin to demand constant handouts from parents. Don't I know that? Or has it ever been different? Then what's the use of all this theater if you don't personally get any benefit from it? Heirs? Oh, come on.

My mom and dad also hummed my ears with their heirs, as if we were some kind of crowned personage or genetic uniqueness. No, people like us are like dirt. And every year there will only be more. Isn’t this a reason to throw away these selfish thoughts about descendants and live for pleasure? Someone is ready to breed poverty every 9 months, but I prefer a decent life without stress and negativity.



As you can see, I have no regrets, I chose this life. Today I can think of something that would never happen to a married couple with kids. Why? Why not? It seems to me that a person should be this: mobile, active. Having an interesting life. And a glass of water, let the robot serve me, because when I get old, this good will definitely be bulky!