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11 Things to Do to Survive a Breakup
Breaking up is a stage that many people go through. Resentment, disappointment and sadness can not be avoided, but you can reduce their strength and reduce the time of action.
Website 11 things you need to do to make it easier to get through the end of a relationship.
Sometimes the pain of a breakup is so intense that we are willing to admit our guilt and ask for a second chance. If you are a few seconds away from this step, ask yourself a question: Do I really miss this particular person, or do I just want a partner? ?
To make it easier to understand, make two lists and analyze which one is longer. Include in one of the personal characteristics of the ex that you miss a lot. In the other – unpleasant, in your opinion, the consequences of life without a partner.
No matter how hard it is, do your best to refrain from calling or texting your ex for 30 days. If you urgently need to collect or transfer personal belongings, use the help of friends. That's the only way you can. quickly restore the emotional state and not get bogged down in the consequences of parting.
On the basis of love and other circumstances that can bind people in a couple, the need for one partner in the other develops. And if the relationship is over, then this need has disappeared. So you're no longer needed. It is more difficult to admit than the fact that love is over. But once you realize that fact, you take the next step. You know you don’t need someone who doesn’t need you.
Research has shown that giving makes the giver happier. Besides, If you give a person the thing he needs, you will feel needed.And that's probably an argument even stronger than happiness at the moment.
What and who to give? Think about what your best friend or close relative dreamed of. Even better, disassemble the rubble in the closet and give away things that you do not use. So you will not only be able to please more people, but also find something to occupy your free time.
Sometimes it seems that revenge is the only thing that will help your ex to understand how much suffering you are experiencing. It’s not worth doing – not even because of moral principles or because you might regret your actions in the future. Your goal now is to develop an indifferent attitude to the situation, andThinking out revenge, you amplify your own emotions, thereby interfering primarily with yourself.
Going on a trip immediately after separation is not always possible. And there is a possibility that you will not be able to feel the beauty of the trip because of the bad mood. As you plan your upcoming vacation, You will be distracted from unnecessary thoughts. Second, scientists have shown that even just thinking about a journey makes us happier.
You don’t have to force yourself to smile. Let the professionals help you. Watch or go to a favorite comedian, turn on the comedy. Follow the humorists on social media. A good joke, if not the first, then the second or third time will make even the saddest person smile.
Start running, dancing or boxing. The latter, by the way, is preferable, because this way you can give out negative emotions. An increase in the load will positively affect the appearance and, as a result, will raise self-esteem, which after parting is in a vulnerable state. In addition, any species Physical activity contributes to the production of endorphin – the very “hormone of happiness”.
Explain to friends what happened is an unpleasant stage after the breakup. A neutral answer is important here, because dirty statements about your ex are primarily defamatory. Of course, you want to talk without choosing words or controlling emotions. Do this in the presence of a very close person, and even better at a session with a psychologist.
Perhaps the most difficult and at the same time the most necessary stage. Here's what you need to know:
- Almost everything has the property of ending. And relationships. Just accept it as you accept the fact that spring is followed by summer.
- Relationships cannot be the mission of your whole life. A single person can also be happy.
- Memories of how good it was with the ex are more illusory. If it were really good, the relationship would not end.
- It doesn't matter who broke up. It's probably nobody's fault, it's just you weren't right for each other.
Buy or make a stop sign yourself. Place it in the place where you most often return to thoughts of the past. Add the aforementioned list here. Every time you’re going to be sad, look at the sign and then look at the things you need to be aware of. It does not help to completely abandon destructive thoughts, butBeing sad next to the sign will be much harder.
Based on Huffingtonpost, Reader's Digest, Psychologytoday
via www.psychologytoday.com/blog/emotional-fitness/201103/10-tips-survive-break