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Is it ethical to return gifts after a breakup?
What to do after a breakup: return or not return gifts of the former partner? People live together for years, give each other gifts for holidays, go to the movies and restaurants. And then something suddenly changes. Different attitudes to gifts and the lack of discussion of the family budget lead to dire consequences.
“My boyfriend gave me jewelry for every birthday.” He was never verbose, rarely said compliments. But we often went to cafes, and Ivan was only happy to buy me something at his own expense. Vanya was always generous, he gave me money for a new dress and a trip to the beautician, often gave gifts without reason.
He explained such generosity by the fact that he did not feel sorry for a loved one. We had a fight recently. I caught him with another woman and told him I was leaving him. Vanya started counting everything he spent on me during our life together. He demanded to return everything to a penny – of course, the amount was too much for me, and I don’t know what to do.
Life together, divided into two, is a joint dinner, weekends, going to the movies, vacation. This is the time given by each partner to each other, care, attention, love. Money is only a part of what a loved one can give. While each partner is happy with his position and is satisfied with the behavior of the partner, he is generous with gifts, compliments and tries to allocate free time for the person with whom he lives.
Some people find it harder to show their feelings and affection for a person with words and deeds. Therefore, there is a substitution of concepts: when a man gives money to his woman for a beauty salon or a new dress, so he shows care and attention. A woman shows care differently: she cooks, cleans and brings comfort to a loved one in the house. Less often, men and women change roles.
But they exist in harmony as long as they are content with their situation. The ability to negotiate and find a compromise in difficult situations only strengthens relations. But when people see the situation differently and do not want to compromise, they diverge.
Assume that the girl has a job and has her own housing. Then, of course, she can leave gifts to her ex-boyfriend and break up with him. When a woman cannot provide for herself or her income is less than that of a man, a man takes advantage of it.
Money manipulation is a clear sign of narcissism. Narcissists always try to create situations in which a partner depends on them financially. We must not forget the fact that the partner gave the girl gifts on his own initiative. This means that she has every right not to give gifts to an ex-boyfriend.
It all depends on the possibilities of the girl. Surely, plush toys and jewelry will not bring happiness to a girl who found her boyfriend in bed with another. Everyone perceives financial investments in their own way. It is necessary to discuss this important issue at the very beginning of the relationship.
The editorial board of Esoteric insists that people get rid of things that cause them negative emotions. After a breakup, people want to get rid of all the things that connect them with the past. Demanding that you return gifts from someone you were good with is petty. The man did not make them give or ask for anything. So it's voluntary money spent. Would you give his ex back his presents?
“My boyfriend gave me jewelry for every birthday.” He was never verbose, rarely said compliments. But we often went to cafes, and Ivan was only happy to buy me something at his own expense. Vanya was always generous, he gave me money for a new dress and a trip to the beautician, often gave gifts without reason.
He explained such generosity by the fact that he did not feel sorry for a loved one. We had a fight recently. I caught him with another woman and told him I was leaving him. Vanya started counting everything he spent on me during our life together. He demanded to return everything to a penny – of course, the amount was too much for me, and I don’t know what to do.
Life together, divided into two, is a joint dinner, weekends, going to the movies, vacation. This is the time given by each partner to each other, care, attention, love. Money is only a part of what a loved one can give. While each partner is happy with his position and is satisfied with the behavior of the partner, he is generous with gifts, compliments and tries to allocate free time for the person with whom he lives.
Some people find it harder to show their feelings and affection for a person with words and deeds. Therefore, there is a substitution of concepts: when a man gives money to his woman for a beauty salon or a new dress, so he shows care and attention. A woman shows care differently: she cooks, cleans and brings comfort to a loved one in the house. Less often, men and women change roles.
But they exist in harmony as long as they are content with their situation. The ability to negotiate and find a compromise in difficult situations only strengthens relations. But when people see the situation differently and do not want to compromise, they diverge.
Assume that the girl has a job and has her own housing. Then, of course, she can leave gifts to her ex-boyfriend and break up with him. When a woman cannot provide for herself or her income is less than that of a man, a man takes advantage of it.
Money manipulation is a clear sign of narcissism. Narcissists always try to create situations in which a partner depends on them financially. We must not forget the fact that the partner gave the girl gifts on his own initiative. This means that she has every right not to give gifts to an ex-boyfriend.
It all depends on the possibilities of the girl. Surely, plush toys and jewelry will not bring happiness to a girl who found her boyfriend in bed with another. Everyone perceives financial investments in their own way. It is necessary to discuss this important issue at the very beginning of the relationship.
The editorial board of Esoteric insists that people get rid of things that cause them negative emotions. After a breakup, people want to get rid of all the things that connect them with the past. Demanding that you return gifts from someone you were good with is petty. The man did not make them give or ask for anything. So it's voluntary money spent. Would you give his ex back his presents?
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