Count in half. Do we want equality? Bashny.Net

Girl, let me pay your bill.
- Oh, wait, I'll get you some utility bills right now.



We fly into space, and we still cannot come to at least some clear decision about paying the restaurant bill.

- In fact, everything is simple here, we explain in a number of materials devoted to this topic, either the bill is divided in half, or the one who invites pays. But with only one caveat – it is highlighted in fat and burned with hot iron – if the invited party is a man, then the woman pays only for herself, because paying a woman for a man is unacceptable. I mean, the person who invites, unless that person is a woman, of course.





Or so: on first dates, a man should always pay, they advise us, and then, when the relationship becomes more trusting, you can already divide the accounts in half. While in fact it would be more logical to assume the opposite, because you should not accept such gestures from an unfamiliar man, while it is not clear who he is, what he is and what he has in his head.

But this kind of advice, implying at least some appearance of equality, is rare. The most popular opinion is that a woman should never insist on paying her half of the bill because a man should feel like a protector. Although again, the connection between protection and a cup of coffee is not quite clear, especially when after paying the bill, a man considers himself entitled to unceremoniously climb under your skirt.

I remember a year or two ago, the Belarusian Internet stirred up the news that in one of the capital’s restaurants for women there is a special menu – without prices. That is, a man receives a full menu, and his companion seems to have no reason to hammer his charming head with some numbers, because paying by default is still not her.

- If a man is decent, he won't let you pay the bill, we're usually told. - And miserly gentlemen should be avoided.

Look, it would seem, just some account there – not on the rabid thousands, probably, but what a rich topic. The score is like a check. The score is an indicator of generosity. The measure of greed and avarice. It's a test score.





- Paying the first bill is a turning point in a relationship, the website of a popular psychological magazine writes. The slightest hitch, the wrong gesture - and the date can end in disaster. The material is supplemented by a small public opinion poll. “He’s slow, I take out the card and pay the bill myself, there’s no question of continuing the relationship.” They brought the bill, he asked what we would do, and the charm of the evening was gone. If a woman insists on paying her half of the bill, the beauty of the moment vanishes. When I pay in a restaurant, I am always a little jealous of a woman – sometimes I want to be in her place and afford to buy as an expensive thing.

It’s hard to believe, but even today there are people who believe that girls see dating as a way to eat for free. And for a bowl of soup, you're ready for a lot. Oh. Even the well-known journalist and popularizer of science in her book about the brain writes that “in our psyche there are some mechanisms that contribute to the tendency of women to have sex for money or other valuable resources.” It’s like a woman’s nature to sell herself for food.

In general, commodity-money relations “you are for me material goods, I am for you love”, gold-diggers, this is all that was and is. There have always been women predators, hunting for other people's wallets, well, and alphonse in nature a lot. So should we draw far-reaching conclusions from such a non-representative sample?

I know a lot of bad things about paying the bill. When the girl did not like the guy and in retaliation it is unclear why she decided to eat him a huge amount. When men, having fun, waited for the girls to order fatter and thicker, and then paid their half the bill and left laughing. When the girl ordered coffee with cognac, and the man said that he pays only for coffee, and for cognac pay yourself. When a young man asked to take a friend with him to dinner to join a lonely friend, and this lonely friend later resented that they refused to go with him to rooms that he had already, incidentally, carefully rented in advance.

Maybe that’s why there are enough women who have long understood that self-payment of the bill will help to avoid many unpleasant moments.





Men also do not quite understand how to behave with women who snatch the bill from their hands. Many people perceive this as a personal insult, someone begins to suspect a feminist in you, from whom, just in case, he was advised to stay away, for someone it turns into a tragedy, since the automatic disables the option “who eats a girl, dances her.”

Only once in my life did a man seem to calmly take the phrase from the series “Today I will pay, because last time you paid.” In other cases, trying to split the score in half was perceived with great negativity - from a surprised-irritated facial expression to an aggressive hissing of "don't shame me in front of people."

The subject of money itself is quite delicate and taboo. It is not customary to talk about everything related to finance, we do not know how to do this and condemn ourselves to suffering and torment. The girl thinks about whether to pay her half of the bill or not, because either she will offend, or she will expose herself as a selfish lover of free food, she is afraid to order a lot and expensive, the man expects her decision with internal panic: suddenly she will order now, and he will not have enough money. And then, in front of the waiter and others, bickering begins, who pays for what, and again everyone is uncomfortable. There is no practice of prescribing all these things in advance to make everyone relax. And by default, a man should.

And here we have a career, achievements, salary and bonuses, but a man still owes more. Only on the simple ground that he is a man, as the notorious Gosha said.

In fact, today men can ask quite a legitimate question: If we have equal rights and earn the same, why should I pay the bill?. It's like thin ice here. You won't be jealous.

Or a vacation. Here I want equality, and here let the man pay the vacation. What do you mean, in half? A couple of months ago, the topic was heatedly discussed on the Internet: a man invited a girl on a trip, there his card did not work at his hotel, he borrowed money from the girl, and he never gave it away. The discussion showed that most women still want to be princesses. But you can't combine equality, partnership, paid bills and a princess. It turns out that, accusing women of inconsistency, men are right about something, because very often, on the one hand, we have equality, I am such a strong and independent woman, a woman power, all things, and on the other, here, pay my bill. To the restaurant, the hotel and the utility. You're a man.

And here we come to the question: Do women really want equality? The centuries-old spell “a man must” is very difficult to eradicate, and it is only necessary to dig a little, it turns out that every second woman is ready to pay the bill by herself, but... And then there must be a bunch of all sorts of “buts”: a man is a knight, a man is a protector, a man is a shoulder and guarantor, a man must take care and care.

I'm not a feminist, but I'm for equality, and paying the bill is a man's prerogative. What a porridge.



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- The fact that men began to pay for women less and less, feminists are to blame, the girl recently resented on the Internet. Another accused feminists that we, they say, because of them now have to work, and so would sit comfortably at home and babysitting. “Well, let there be two or three strong women in a million, since this is how their body works.”

And the other princesses.

Nobody wants equality, which is what you mean. There’s a lot of talk about patriarchy being eternal because men won’t give up. Women don’t seem to be fighting too much.published



Author: Anna Petrova




Picture: lady.tut.by/news/relationship/519412.html