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10 secrets that men and women should know about yourself and each other
That men and women do not know about each other? This article, which is a deeper reading will help the reader understand why he / she has appeared / familiarize close partner and what to do with those feelings which now emanates at the beloved (or not very beloved)
"To get the love ... fill yourself with it, until you start to attract love like a magnet».
~ Charles Enel
0. The men and women there to each other a sense of love when they are invisible ancestors brings them together to solve their outstanding issues.
Mystery numbered zero. I assigned it to her room, because I know from experience how frustrating to hear people that their choice of a loved one is not blocked. Only when the severance of relations the people are willing to accept, "yes, it's slipped my ancestors is a walking torture. That's just what I do not understand! "
I will try to briefly explain why fathers need this trick with your choice.
In the beginning, men and women are lovely and friendly with each other. Between them there is a spiritual affection, spiritual stress. Both joined the desire to show their best side.
For what? As they say in the old days, to showmanship. We all understand that, but over time, when the package is opened, it turns out that the goods are not so good, and instead of sympathy Now - rejection ...
Where does love, and why there are claims? Complaints are always based on unmet needs. Need - is the need for something necessary. About Maslow pyramid, I think, you know. It begins with the basic physical and ends the need for self-realization.
Requirements that lovers can not meet each other - it peeped experience of their parent families. As parents, for example, the need for love, attention, respect, and their children (our love) are in need of the same.
But parents have failed at the time to address these problems by looking at their elders, who may have died in the war or, for example, themselves suffered heavy losses (collectivization, emigration).
Information on losses and unmet needs recorded in the DNA. The ancestors gave it to us through the blood and experience. From it can not escape. It can only recognize and satisfy the needs of those who failed to meet the ancestors.
Here for this and given the beloved. But one that is in their DNA records of unmet needs that are similar to yours. Because after the honeymoon relationship start times of discontent.
Figuratively speaking, invisible ancestors stand for love and waking up, rubbing his hands, saying: "Well, darling! Povorkovali and waking! Tapericha poser our time to deal with! "
Will the lovers of wisdom to meet the needs of their ancestors and begin their happy life depends on how they can solve the problem, concluded in the first secret:
1. Men and women are looking for in a relationship attention. Any dissatisfaction in relationships arises from the fact that a party receives less attention from the partner.
It may seem that relations are suffering from the collapse of the complex nature, bad habits, obscene acts of one or both partners, but if the partners give attention to each other, these factors can not lead to a break.
But when one partner ceases to give attention to the other, then the battle begins, there is a place where all the negative feelings.
Men and women operate differently attention. The idea is taken from George Subordina:
In fact, there are two attention. Women form of attention when a person listens to the other party completely, ie without resistance takes, shall be submitted to him conversationalist and male form of attention - involvement in any process. In this case, the person is completely involved, and not diverted to anything else.
Man longs for a woman to fully listen to him, his mouth open, and agreeing with all of its arguments. I accept it without reservation information. In other words, it shows to the female form of attention. Like this man expects a woman will always be ready to ... him.
And she listened to him, a man applies his receiving treatment for attention. He draws it (or those in whom an interest) in the process of formation of new experiences so that it (they) opened and started to listen.
The man in the relationship always sets the direction, ie It offers to show interest in something new, where, in his opinion, there may be a new experience, and thus he will listen to, for example:
- Honey, let's go to the movies!
- And you do not want to Antalya for a week to give up ?!
- Today, Pauline invited to dinner, you're ready to seven?
But from a woman depends on whether it would support the initiatives of men. After all, she can refuse to listen to his suggestions:
- No, dear, I tire of these militants. I want to sit at home.
- And I'm lost in the Turkey! There's always do not know how their all-inklyuziva escape!
- Pauline? These tedious intellectuals? Let them say thank you for all that we visit them!
The woman, not the man in the long-term maintenance of its involvement, becomes a source of discomfort and gradually he stops to win her attention.
A man who stopped to involve women in their interests, not giving her a new experience, it is disappointing.
The woman said that a weak man, who could not convince her to listen to him, the man said the woman bitch, which is not involved in his proposal.
However, if the attention and involvement existed between men and women at least for a while, there is a bond that lives on its own and is the second secret.
2. Between man and woman there is a relationship channel, sensual relationship.
When you break the relationship connection remains and is suffering from one side and the pumping power for the second. As long as the connection exists, the partners alternately change the direction of energy flow through this channel. Therefore, one and then the second feels better, then worse partner.
Any relationship is a certain process of energy and feelings, emotions, behaviors - the result of his.
The fact that relationships can be represented in the form of a pipe between a man and a woman, for which pumps feelings and emotions from one partner to another, considerably simplifies the explanation of why the rupture of relations with the one of the partners is bad, and the other, as they say, luck itself is in the hands of .
Communication, trumpet, binding - call it what you want. She can not see, but in fact there are discomfort. It is not seen waves that come in your mobile phone, but the sound in the tube - a reality.
Many of you have often felt long, exhausting periods of ill health when he wanted to support even a small partner in the form of SMS, call or kind words.
But there no sound, no wiggling.
And when hear rumors that the partner carries ?! Inside begin boiling resentment, revenge, desire to rant and rave!
What to do?
A) Understand that your connection - an independent unit of the universe. Just as you pipe cleaner. The pipe is and she will join you. Communication in the form of a pipe will always look for a moment to let you know about yourself. To do this, the pipe will cause negative feelings and energy drain.
B) Once you realize it, use a pipe intended for the last time. Take your partner through it all belongs to you, and give him what belongs to him. Thus, the need for pipe disappears. She dissolved.
B) Thank partner because it was in your life. Give him a place in the heart.
C) Do you remember the mystery of Zero? In these respects, you have satisfied the need for ancestors? If not, then this place will come the same partner.
To the relationship did not come to rupture and suffering, you need to know about the Third Secret:
3. A man should divorce his mother before decides to marry a woman.
A man always has its first woman. It's his mother.
As a boy he was fond of her first twelve years of life. Then the connection is weakened, but she always breaks?
If the mother - a self-sufficient, mature personality, it is easy to let his son into the world.
His mother sends his son into the hands of his father. Now, the man responsible for the man. So manhood passes from father to son.
But these days, is not always so smooth.
Often the mother herself is a little Inner girl, full of fear and mistrust. And then she could not trust his son to anyone else. Neither the father of the child, which may not be together for a long time, let alone a girl laid eyes on the most precious thing in her life.
Mother does not give freedom son is everything for him. If she knew that turns it into his own Jonah!
But she does not want to know - she's a mother, and most of all loved his krovinochku!
Subconsciously, she wants to be desired and demanded at least to him, because he feels like a complete jerk. And grow their own kind.
So what! - She says. - As long as I'm alive he would be under my protection, and is fully provided.
So I want to ask, and when you will not, it is also up to you to go to the other world?
Mom, please, the country needs men! Release them - let them become a man! I love them for real, and not out of fear for his tear-stained Inner Child.
Mom, that the man remained in a state of maturity of your ward, or worse "psychological man", he would have to drink. Only there, in a drinking bout, he will be able to fulfill your parental message: "Do not grow!"
Men do not marry until he divorced her mother. Anyway, Mom, as "the first and the Law" discourage you from his wife.
After a man to divorce his mother and him, according to the Bible, united wife, there is that lurking in the Fourth Mystery:
4. Women will always want to deprive a man of manhood that he has not got another.
Masculinity - the ability to penetrate into the unknown, into a world where nothing is yet known and where you need to create order. The universe has assigned this responsibility to the men, causing them to expand their masculinity, overcoming obstacles and opening the mysteries of nature.
A man should be involved in the new master this new production and bring knowledge to the feet of their women. Wife or mother. (Let's assume that our man has divorced his wife and brings trophies).
So increasing his manhood.
And his woman? It is the very universe that wants to be explored her man. She then revealed to him, he hides some its secrets in order to call his interest in the new knowledge it itself.
And when he wants to start learning another universe, then it appears at first puzzled, then resentment, "How? You still did not know me! How can you learn something different? I can not forgive you for this! "
Seeing his purpose - to learn new things, she invites him to her "ideal":
Sit at home and hunting EXPLORE HERE!
So it deprives him of courage, because now he can not deny it - would be a scandal, "How? You want me to change? Then get out for good! "
He agrees to stay close and slowly becomes a son to her, and she to him - his mother.
Their relationship come to naught, but the main thing for her is achieved - a number is the one who will always be to study the universe and serve it.
What is the way out of this impasse? It is in the Fifth Mystery:
5. Man is growing in status only to the love of his woman. These women had two: my mother and wife. If a man does not grow in status, it means that there is no love for him.
What all men want? Correct, development, growth!
Growth in human daily life appears as a transition from one state to another.
For example: the student wants a thief in the student, the student - the rich, the rich man - leave his name in history (historical figure). She wants to be a wife, a wife - to shine with pride and happiness for themselves, their children and husband.
To grow in status, need resources, we need support. Who provides this support? Anyone who believes one who loves!
When a couple for a long time can not go out of his status in the higher rank, for example, can not be a long time to save up for the expansion of living space, this means that man as miners and hunters, not strong enough. He needs support.
Support it can take only a woman who force their faith will show him that he is strong and classy.
A man is not strong woman. The man becomes stronger when it allows a woman to feel strong.
Women are not weaker than men. She just knows that it must be a man feel like a hero when he travels across the expanses of it is still unexplored universe.
Woman ready to give a man power to it involved his attention to her person, to its interests. Woman gives energy, remember, through their attention and love for man.
Her love, he feels stronger and has the ability to grow in status, to refer the woman to the status of his (or her mother).
As soon as a woman stops to give love and attention to the man, his rise in status is stopped. There is much to blame for the lack of growth of man and money, but the reason is a woman who does not love him.
What is love to find out from the Sixth Mystery:
6. Love - is the desire to develop their partner. If your partner does not want development, he does not love you.
It is often heard such remarks: "Why do you want these books, training, seminars? Stay at home, take care of children! "
I want to say this person uttering it? He asks for attention.
Attention If it gets much, but still continues to hold a partner in the "golden cage", he does not want growth and development to a close.
Why did these people next?
Because both of them remain profitable wounded children and to play the role of their ancestors unfulfilled:
One -zhertva, the other - the executioner. One - a nonentity, the other - the superiority.
One of the two who are in the top position, in a position of superiority over the wounded man, but hides the truth from him. His strategy: not to feel your pain, you have to be steeper than others. Towering over the victims, I would not notice that the very same poor as they are.
This strategy leads to its decision not to allow the partner to develop, or partner escape from his slavery.
Wakes up, he sees that the path to freedom is opened and run away!
But the growth does not stop, and then slowly, slowly, through the role of the executioner, the tyrant, the partner begins to independently set up within the "golden cage" to pull out of it wounded his victim Internal children. Process and tormenting he concluded in the Seventh Mystery:
7. The man is the woman his every action, even the negative: idleness, beatings. Man - woman a mirror, which reflects everything that she does not want to know.
Even in the most difficult relationship, in so-called dysfunctional families, men and women are to each other. They - a mirror of what we ourselves do not want to admit.
The two are always together, until they have something to give to one another. And, perhaps, they give each other the pain, humiliation and suffering. But they did not disperse. And the reason is only one: The history of the ancestors.
Two repeat the history of their ancestors, showing their love is not a partner, and to the ancestors grandmother, great-grandfather, or to abort the child mother.
I wrote a lot about it on his blog, but now I just want to repeat an old idea with new words:
If you do not disagree with those who have not developed, and causes suffering, you, thanks to the tyrant, and gradually realize remove yourself from the Internal wounded children that were created during the time of your ancestors.
Sorry, but it's so ... Thank tyrant, because his family the same story as in yours. Because you and the couple.
Two fighting for love, but you can win, just knowing the Eighth Mystery:
8. To the man to beat a woman, he has to win the battle in her eyes, beat a man to a woman, she should lose him.
Taoists say, "Woman - wide, and the man - deep".
This means that a woman feels good when his soul can open the wide, wide, and for this she needs to afford to trust the world to accept it, not wanting to change.
This state is in the field, when you lie on the grass and to let a sky, sun, air, grass, ants and sun. And all-all-all.
The female energy flows horizontally, it is like the Earth.
A male energy is vertical, and the man feels great when, towering like a strong tree, the roots penetrate deep into the ground.
The man is powered by the female energy, as wood is fed from the ground.
In a relationship, if a woman stands on a man she feels a victory, but in the end loses, because the tree under the ground is an earthquake.
At this moment a woman shakes like mountains during the quake, and she feels deeply hidden trouble. With each victory over men-trees growing anxiety and this growing fatigue.
P.S.
"To get the love ... fill yourself with it, until you start to attract love like a magnet».
~ Charles Enel
0. The men and women there to each other a sense of love when they are invisible ancestors brings them together to solve their outstanding issues.
Mystery numbered zero. I assigned it to her room, because I know from experience how frustrating to hear people that their choice of a loved one is not blocked. Only when the severance of relations the people are willing to accept, "yes, it's slipped my ancestors is a walking torture. That's just what I do not understand! "
I will try to briefly explain why fathers need this trick with your choice.
In the beginning, men and women are lovely and friendly with each other. Between them there is a spiritual affection, spiritual stress. Both joined the desire to show their best side.
For what? As they say in the old days, to showmanship. We all understand that, but over time, when the package is opened, it turns out that the goods are not so good, and instead of sympathy Now - rejection ...
Where does love, and why there are claims? Complaints are always based on unmet needs. Need - is the need for something necessary. About Maslow pyramid, I think, you know. It begins with the basic physical and ends the need for self-realization.
Requirements that lovers can not meet each other - it peeped experience of their parent families. As parents, for example, the need for love, attention, respect, and their children (our love) are in need of the same.
But parents have failed at the time to address these problems by looking at their elders, who may have died in the war or, for example, themselves suffered heavy losses (collectivization, emigration).
Information on losses and unmet needs recorded in the DNA. The ancestors gave it to us through the blood and experience. From it can not escape. It can only recognize and satisfy the needs of those who failed to meet the ancestors.
Here for this and given the beloved. But one that is in their DNA records of unmet needs that are similar to yours. Because after the honeymoon relationship start times of discontent.
Figuratively speaking, invisible ancestors stand for love and waking up, rubbing his hands, saying: "Well, darling! Povorkovali and waking! Tapericha poser our time to deal with! "
Will the lovers of wisdom to meet the needs of their ancestors and begin their happy life depends on how they can solve the problem, concluded in the first secret:
1. Men and women are looking for in a relationship attention. Any dissatisfaction in relationships arises from the fact that a party receives less attention from the partner.
It may seem that relations are suffering from the collapse of the complex nature, bad habits, obscene acts of one or both partners, but if the partners give attention to each other, these factors can not lead to a break.
But when one partner ceases to give attention to the other, then the battle begins, there is a place where all the negative feelings.
Men and women operate differently attention. The idea is taken from George Subordina:
In fact, there are two attention. Women form of attention when a person listens to the other party completely, ie without resistance takes, shall be submitted to him conversationalist and male form of attention - involvement in any process. In this case, the person is completely involved, and not diverted to anything else.
Man longs for a woman to fully listen to him, his mouth open, and agreeing with all of its arguments. I accept it without reservation information. In other words, it shows to the female form of attention. Like this man expects a woman will always be ready to ... him.
And she listened to him, a man applies his receiving treatment for attention. He draws it (or those in whom an interest) in the process of formation of new experiences so that it (they) opened and started to listen.
The man in the relationship always sets the direction, ie It offers to show interest in something new, where, in his opinion, there may be a new experience, and thus he will listen to, for example:
- Honey, let's go to the movies!
- And you do not want to Antalya for a week to give up ?!
- Today, Pauline invited to dinner, you're ready to seven?
But from a woman depends on whether it would support the initiatives of men. After all, she can refuse to listen to his suggestions:
- No, dear, I tire of these militants. I want to sit at home.
- And I'm lost in the Turkey! There's always do not know how their all-inklyuziva escape!
- Pauline? These tedious intellectuals? Let them say thank you for all that we visit them!
The woman, not the man in the long-term maintenance of its involvement, becomes a source of discomfort and gradually he stops to win her attention.
A man who stopped to involve women in their interests, not giving her a new experience, it is disappointing.
The woman said that a weak man, who could not convince her to listen to him, the man said the woman bitch, which is not involved in his proposal.
However, if the attention and involvement existed between men and women at least for a while, there is a bond that lives on its own and is the second secret.
2. Between man and woman there is a relationship channel, sensual relationship.
When you break the relationship connection remains and is suffering from one side and the pumping power for the second. As long as the connection exists, the partners alternately change the direction of energy flow through this channel. Therefore, one and then the second feels better, then worse partner.
Any relationship is a certain process of energy and feelings, emotions, behaviors - the result of his.
The fact that relationships can be represented in the form of a pipe between a man and a woman, for which pumps feelings and emotions from one partner to another, considerably simplifies the explanation of why the rupture of relations with the one of the partners is bad, and the other, as they say, luck itself is in the hands of .
Communication, trumpet, binding - call it what you want. She can not see, but in fact there are discomfort. It is not seen waves that come in your mobile phone, but the sound in the tube - a reality.
Many of you have often felt long, exhausting periods of ill health when he wanted to support even a small partner in the form of SMS, call or kind words.
But there no sound, no wiggling.
And when hear rumors that the partner carries ?! Inside begin boiling resentment, revenge, desire to rant and rave!
What to do?
A) Understand that your connection - an independent unit of the universe. Just as you pipe cleaner. The pipe is and she will join you. Communication in the form of a pipe will always look for a moment to let you know about yourself. To do this, the pipe will cause negative feelings and energy drain.
B) Once you realize it, use a pipe intended for the last time. Take your partner through it all belongs to you, and give him what belongs to him. Thus, the need for pipe disappears. She dissolved.
B) Thank partner because it was in your life. Give him a place in the heart.
C) Do you remember the mystery of Zero? In these respects, you have satisfied the need for ancestors? If not, then this place will come the same partner.
To the relationship did not come to rupture and suffering, you need to know about the Third Secret:
3. A man should divorce his mother before decides to marry a woman.
A man always has its first woman. It's his mother.
As a boy he was fond of her first twelve years of life. Then the connection is weakened, but she always breaks?
If the mother - a self-sufficient, mature personality, it is easy to let his son into the world.
His mother sends his son into the hands of his father. Now, the man responsible for the man. So manhood passes from father to son.
But these days, is not always so smooth.
Often the mother herself is a little Inner girl, full of fear and mistrust. And then she could not trust his son to anyone else. Neither the father of the child, which may not be together for a long time, let alone a girl laid eyes on the most precious thing in her life.
Mother does not give freedom son is everything for him. If she knew that turns it into his own Jonah!
But she does not want to know - she's a mother, and most of all loved his krovinochku!
Subconsciously, she wants to be desired and demanded at least to him, because he feels like a complete jerk. And grow their own kind.
So what! - She says. - As long as I'm alive he would be under my protection, and is fully provided.
So I want to ask, and when you will not, it is also up to you to go to the other world?
Mom, please, the country needs men! Release them - let them become a man! I love them for real, and not out of fear for his tear-stained Inner Child.
Mom, that the man remained in a state of maturity of your ward, or worse "psychological man", he would have to drink. Only there, in a drinking bout, he will be able to fulfill your parental message: "Do not grow!"
Men do not marry until he divorced her mother. Anyway, Mom, as "the first and the Law" discourage you from his wife.
After a man to divorce his mother and him, according to the Bible, united wife, there is that lurking in the Fourth Mystery:
4. Women will always want to deprive a man of manhood that he has not got another.
Masculinity - the ability to penetrate into the unknown, into a world where nothing is yet known and where you need to create order. The universe has assigned this responsibility to the men, causing them to expand their masculinity, overcoming obstacles and opening the mysteries of nature.
A man should be involved in the new master this new production and bring knowledge to the feet of their women. Wife or mother. (Let's assume that our man has divorced his wife and brings trophies).
So increasing his manhood.
And his woman? It is the very universe that wants to be explored her man. She then revealed to him, he hides some its secrets in order to call his interest in the new knowledge it itself.
And when he wants to start learning another universe, then it appears at first puzzled, then resentment, "How? You still did not know me! How can you learn something different? I can not forgive you for this! "
Seeing his purpose - to learn new things, she invites him to her "ideal":
Sit at home and hunting EXPLORE HERE!
So it deprives him of courage, because now he can not deny it - would be a scandal, "How? You want me to change? Then get out for good! "
He agrees to stay close and slowly becomes a son to her, and she to him - his mother.
Their relationship come to naught, but the main thing for her is achieved - a number is the one who will always be to study the universe and serve it.
What is the way out of this impasse? It is in the Fifth Mystery:
5. Man is growing in status only to the love of his woman. These women had two: my mother and wife. If a man does not grow in status, it means that there is no love for him.
What all men want? Correct, development, growth!
Growth in human daily life appears as a transition from one state to another.
For example: the student wants a thief in the student, the student - the rich, the rich man - leave his name in history (historical figure). She wants to be a wife, a wife - to shine with pride and happiness for themselves, their children and husband.
To grow in status, need resources, we need support. Who provides this support? Anyone who believes one who loves!
When a couple for a long time can not go out of his status in the higher rank, for example, can not be a long time to save up for the expansion of living space, this means that man as miners and hunters, not strong enough. He needs support.
Support it can take only a woman who force their faith will show him that he is strong and classy.
A man is not strong woman. The man becomes stronger when it allows a woman to feel strong.
Women are not weaker than men. She just knows that it must be a man feel like a hero when he travels across the expanses of it is still unexplored universe.
Woman ready to give a man power to it involved his attention to her person, to its interests. Woman gives energy, remember, through their attention and love for man.
Her love, he feels stronger and has the ability to grow in status, to refer the woman to the status of his (or her mother).
As soon as a woman stops to give love and attention to the man, his rise in status is stopped. There is much to blame for the lack of growth of man and money, but the reason is a woman who does not love him.
What is love to find out from the Sixth Mystery:
6. Love - is the desire to develop their partner. If your partner does not want development, he does not love you.
It is often heard such remarks: "Why do you want these books, training, seminars? Stay at home, take care of children! "
I want to say this person uttering it? He asks for attention.
Attention If it gets much, but still continues to hold a partner in the "golden cage", he does not want growth and development to a close.
Why did these people next?
Because both of them remain profitable wounded children and to play the role of their ancestors unfulfilled:
One -zhertva, the other - the executioner. One - a nonentity, the other - the superiority.
One of the two who are in the top position, in a position of superiority over the wounded man, but hides the truth from him. His strategy: not to feel your pain, you have to be steeper than others. Towering over the victims, I would not notice that the very same poor as they are.
This strategy leads to its decision not to allow the partner to develop, or partner escape from his slavery.
Wakes up, he sees that the path to freedom is opened and run away!
But the growth does not stop, and then slowly, slowly, through the role of the executioner, the tyrant, the partner begins to independently set up within the "golden cage" to pull out of it wounded his victim Internal children. Process and tormenting he concluded in the Seventh Mystery:
7. The man is the woman his every action, even the negative: idleness, beatings. Man - woman a mirror, which reflects everything that she does not want to know.
Even in the most difficult relationship, in so-called dysfunctional families, men and women are to each other. They - a mirror of what we ourselves do not want to admit.
The two are always together, until they have something to give to one another. And, perhaps, they give each other the pain, humiliation and suffering. But they did not disperse. And the reason is only one: The history of the ancestors.
Two repeat the history of their ancestors, showing their love is not a partner, and to the ancestors grandmother, great-grandfather, or to abort the child mother.
I wrote a lot about it on his blog, but now I just want to repeat an old idea with new words:
If you do not disagree with those who have not developed, and causes suffering, you, thanks to the tyrant, and gradually realize remove yourself from the Internal wounded children that were created during the time of your ancestors.
Sorry, but it's so ... Thank tyrant, because his family the same story as in yours. Because you and the couple.
Two fighting for love, but you can win, just knowing the Eighth Mystery:
8. To the man to beat a woman, he has to win the battle in her eyes, beat a man to a woman, she should lose him.
Taoists say, "Woman - wide, and the man - deep".
This means that a woman feels good when his soul can open the wide, wide, and for this she needs to afford to trust the world to accept it, not wanting to change.
This state is in the field, when you lie on the grass and to let a sky, sun, air, grass, ants and sun. And all-all-all.
The female energy flows horizontally, it is like the Earth.
A male energy is vertical, and the man feels great when, towering like a strong tree, the roots penetrate deep into the ground.
The man is powered by the female energy, as wood is fed from the ground.
In a relationship, if a woman stands on a man she feels a victory, but in the end loses, because the tree under the ground is an earthquake.
At this moment a woman shakes like mountains during the quake, and she feels deeply hidden trouble. With each victory over men-trees growing anxiety and this growing fatigue.
P.S.