The biggest mistakes that we make in 30 years, and what do they teach us

One of the users of Quora asked a very important question: "What is the biggest mistake you made in their 30 years, and what she taught you?" The question provoked a lively and heated debate, the most interesting opinions of which today we want to share with you.

 

Do not move on the second life plane think one of my main mistakes is that I have too much time dedicated to work and career, pushing everything else into the background. Under all the rest, I mean family, friends, and even their own health.

After 20 years and until recently (I'm 35) I have lived in this mode: Wake up, go to work, come home, and sleep, and the next day to get up only for it to happen again.



I just didn't pay attention to how such strenuous conditions harmful to my health, and did not pay enough attention to relationships.Looking back, I can't remember something important and significant. These years were just an endless race for a false target, which then seemed the most important.

So now I'm going to catch up on all that missed. I spent a lot of time to understand, that for me is really important, but I'm glad I realized it too late and I have a chance to live life the way I want it.

 

Take care of your health. This is the first and most important priority. When you are 30 years old, and you already feel tired and weary life of man — it sucks, believe me.

 

You will work all my life. Youth is the only time in my life. Don't miss this time. Do not waste your time exclusively to work — communicate, organize your personal life, don't limit yourself to just home and work. Even after 20 or even 30 years you will have something to remember.

 

Don't waste time gneva not sure this is the answer you're looking for, but I will say: the biggest mistake I made in my 30 years, was anger.

I wasted too much of your time being angry at bosses, colleagues, politicians, girls who left me, and just at the people who lied to me.

My anger was justified. Even now, looking back, I realize that I had a good reason, but at the same time I realize that my anger was a waste of time. And the damage I inflicted only himself, not those people I was angry.

 

Appreciate the people who are in your jisne met an amazing girl that you really love. But very soon the fact that my life had truly loved one, I began to take for granted. Worse, my pride never let me show her how much I care about her. She has long fought for our relationship, but in the end left me. She is now married to another.

We are still friends, often communicate. It's like hell, but it's better than not seeing her at all.

What I made of it? Don't be idiots. Pay attention to your loved one, every day, every moment, show him how you love and appreciate him. And if you know what I did was stupid, spit on the damn pride and ask forgiveness.

 

Don't compare yourself to druginina the biggest mistake: I thought that when I turn 30, I'll be able to be on the top, about which dreamed all his life. But I started to constantly compare myself to those who were younger than me and turned out to be much more successful. I had nothing, while others had a house in San Francisco, a thriving business and family.

Now I understand that he wanted to give up in the beginning just because someone out there was successful than me. Do not compare yourself with others and don't think in 30 years you will be able to achieve anything. 30 life is not over but just beginning.

 

Sometimes the path to happiness lies through his stradanija 30 years, I made four fatal mistakes.

Mistake # 1. I keep putting off pregnancy for later. First was waiting for the right time, and when it is right, by my standards, the time has come, I was offered a good job with great career prospects. Of course, I agreed. And, of course, I didn't want to go on maternity leave immediately after I got a new perspective place.

A few years later I decided to get pregnant, but failed. This was followed by a course of long treatment, I still got pregnant, but I miscarried (words cannot describe how hard it was to survive). A year later I got pregnant again, and then made the second mistake that I'll never forgive myself.

Mistake # 2. As I have always been in good shape and tried to support her, the thought that I can continue Jogging and during pregnancy. On the sixth month of pregnancy during the run my water broke.

Mistake # 3. I didn't fight for her child. Neither I nor my husband didn't know what to do, and I'm still not sure we gave the right advice. We were told that our baby would not survive. They gave me morphine during childbirth. I don't remember what happened after that. I don't know exactly what happened to my child. It just took. I felt guilty, I felt bad and embarrassed and ashamed still.

Mistake # 4. I turned away from her husband instead go through it with him. I felt wild pain and guilt and didn't know how to cope with them. I pulled away from her husband (the man whom I loved and love still) and eventually we parted.

Life is normal only when I turned 40. After 40 I remarried and had a baby (43 years), and now we're a happy family of three. If I had to go through all this hell to finally find happiness? Yes, no, maybe. I have no answer.

 

Don't forget Trusau I had a few good childhood friends, with whom we grew up.

My wife got along very well with some of them, and after the wedding I started to distance myself from friends because I didn't want to upset her. I didn't call them, were not invited, did not go with them to clubs and bars, did not go with them fishing. That is not doing anything that we did together before.

At the time I didn't really think about it, I believed that doing the right thing, because they are like brothers to me, they should understand.

18 years later my marriage fell apart, and I miss his good old buddies. I tried to regain our friendship, but after all this time, in our lives, so much has changed, and even when we see each other, friends seem terribly distant. I still hope to regain our friendship, but I understand that it will take time.

My advice to you: do not think about friends as brothers. Your brother will always be your brother even if you hate it. Friend may not stay your friend forever. Friendship requires constant attention and participation.

The best time — cachamai error:

  • Spent too much money on shoes instead spend it on travel.
  • Did not continue their higher education.
  • Not studied martial arts.
  • Didn't do family photos every year.
And you know what I realized? Do not waste time on regrets — to start doing something that doesn't have time, NOW!

 

Trust your chuvstvami married not because they loved man, and because everyone around me (relatives, friends and acquaintances) said that he's a good guy and just loves me. He really was a good guy and loved me, but we were too different, with this person I lost my "I".

I'm not sure it can be called a mistake: now we're divorced and we have two children, without whom I cannot imagine my life. Thanks to this I understood the main thing: trust your feelings and never make important decisions based on the opinions of other people.

 

To make mistakes is not the worst. The worst thing — they are not ispravitelno admitted that I'm depressed, which is every day more and more progresses. Not asked for help. Missed an inordinate number of opportunities. Almost destroyed his career. Felt 20 years. Did not build a serious relationship, led a promiscuous sexual life, and organized countless parties and drank too much. Constantly hanging out with "friends" who only contributed to my deviant behavior and never taught me anything good. Have not used their free time in order to obtain the second higher education or to learn a foreign language. Instead, I spent it with my aforementioned "friends". Spent money on booze instead of having to invest in a profitable business. If I continued this way of life, for 40 years I would be poor, disabled and sick. Fortunately, I had the chance to reconsider their attitude to life and begin all over again. But I'm still sad to think of all the opportunities that I missed in their 30's. published

 

Author: Karina Shlapakova

  

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Source: lifehacker.ru/2014/10/18/samye-bolshie-oshibki-v-30/