How to survive someone else's success

I think it will not be a revelation to many people difficult for someone else's success.

When the other hard, sincerely sympathize with him much easier. And I want to help and support as I can (and this is also a kind of art).

But genuinely enjoy someone else's success without envy and feeling of inferiority, especially in an area where you are trying to achieve a result, is much more complicated.

No matter how far we've come — becomes more important how miles away another. Men/women today pay more attention not to me? From melancholy. Someone has collected more Facebook likes under the post? Longing and envy. Someone who happily talks about how well something turned out, and people congratulate him? You too, congratulate, laugh, and a pit in my stomach.

And then some people start to shame yourself for things that can't genuinely be happy for another.


Want to offer a little thought experiment.

Imagine yourself and another person in the form of two balls the same size. You are equal. You and this person have something in common that unites you. For example, you colleagues. Or two women who are in the "search". Or you brothers/sisters. Presented?

Now imagine that the second person/the Orb begins to grow and swell because he went doing, and he starts telling you about how he successfully implemented a project, earned money, found yourself a woman/man in General, he/she definitely is something that you don't have (and would like).

What happens to your "inner balloon"? You shrink, shrink, fail to themselves, or rolled back away from this growing ball of a neighbor? If so, what are you feeling in this moment, what feelings arise when someone else's balloon is inflated, and you deflate?

Now imagine such a picture: another person inflated and your "inner balloon" remains the same size. Don't be more and not cringe, and just remain what it was, same size. I feel in this case?

If you still can not "not cringe", that prevents it to make strongly expressed narcissistic personality traits. In the narcissistic picture in this world there's only room for one, and the success of one and failure of another person automatically means denying its right to exist.

In a more respectful world there is a place for everyone and someone else's "bloat" does not deprive me of my seat. You increase but I decrease, and everything that I had, did not disappear and stayed with me after. As well as other people who admire someone else, does not displace us from their souls remain where he was, not moving and not shrinking. People aren't communicating vessels in a closed systemwhere if you have arrived somewhere, somewhere necessarily departed. If it came of love or recognition, then we are not decreasing — no love, no recognition, no respect.

Another little experiment with balloons.

If you plagued by fears about how you'll perceive how to evaluate, approve or not — imagine all those concerns in a very bloated ball of anxiety (especially since all these experiences are literally bursting chest, squeezing the breath). Bursting?

Now I take a small needle and carefully pierce the ball — it bursts and deflates slowly. Will feel bloated this balloon is deflated and gradually its walls merge with your skin, and you become equal to ourselves, without trying to blow something suck otherwise. What do you feel?

I like these experiments. They are not a magic exercise, eliminate all negative experiences, but they allow you to remind yourself that I always remain equal to itself, regardless of what happens to other people. published

Author: Ilya Latypov


P. S. And remember, just changing your mind — together we change the world! ©

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