In fact, why it often happens that the man who is indifferent to you, starts to behave this way? It seems to be you, and it is clear that he likes you, but it does not change the situation – he remains a distant, if not ignores you.
But, before we proceed to consider the main reasons for this neglect, you need to think about. Do not allow to you the thought that your question itself is fundamentally wrong?
You ask yourself, "Why is he ignoring me because he likes me?" Ie you obviously believe that have reliable information about his feelings. You are sure that the interest he has.
However, this is not always the case, so I suggest you to think well, to not to ask ourselves – self-deception, when you consider that I like him, and you he did not like or did not like in principle.Only when you will be sure that something between you is, there is a sense to consider the causes of neglect.
Otherwise, everything is crystal clear: he ignores you because you do not like him.
Only by excluding this option, it makes sense to move on and look for reasons.
But these reasons can be the following.
Consider first the two more rare variant, and then two more frequent.
1. He was not ready for a serious relationship in principle
This is one of the possible reasons, but to call it common impossible.
The point is, the man realizes that if he starts to actively Express their feelings to you, it is fraught with serious consequences
. And he didn't think it important enough in my life. At least for now.
Yes, somewhere in the distant future, it admits the possibility that he will want to build a serious relationship based on mutual commitment and trust, however, now and in the foreseeable future, he's not even thinking about it.Question: do you need such a friend?
2. He believes that a woman too good for him
Another rare variant, which is still sometimes encountered.
Its essence is that a man really thinks you are too good for him and is afraid to clearly Express your sympathy for fear of your direct or indirect failure.
This is exactly the situation that plays out everywhere in all sorts of romantic melodramas. She is a brilliant beautiful girl from a noble family, well educated, well kept community, etc, etc... He is a regular guy, nothing special, not remarkable, which is, of course, fell on the ears and nothing to do with me can not and can not leave, and the convergence to go also not ready.
In the movie, this very often (because the girls want so badly to believe that he's just a little shy), but in life it happens infrequently.More often you will find not modest and shy, brash and straight men who have no idea that they are unworthy of you.
Moreover, be sure that those who actually believe that you are too good for them – it's a rare male self-esteem which greatly reduced
But what the man with low self esteem? If fate has made you such a man, it is unlikely that you will want to repeat this experience...
Behind were two more rare option, and now it is time to disassemble the two more common reasons why a man can ignore you, despite the fact that he likes you.
3. Throwing responsibility
This is much more common variant than described above.
In this case, the basis of the behavior of the man lies the desire to "give" you the responsibility for the development of relations.
What does it mean? This means that man is set to play the female role relationship, and you want to take the role of men
In other words, he wants to see you as a leader who can go. To go down the road that you've already thought about.
Instead of having to get yourself "in charge" and take an active role, the man "surrenders" and gives "ship's wheel" relationship in your hands.Reasons why this can happen, usually only two:1. The man watched a similar model of relations among people close to him (e.g. parents), and so subconsciously seeks to repeat.
Simply put, he's not doing it on purpose, he had no malicious intent, "Aha! I now it will shift all the responsibility, and I will quietly follow her trail..."
No, as a rule, this does not happen, and men do it because of inadequate assimilation for them behavior models (female).
2. As for the second point, that the reason may be you.
Every time you do not give the man to show initiative and hinder their performance with the introduction of some idea, do not give yourself to make a decision (even the most insignificant), you thereby contribute to the development of it female behaviors, one of which is indecision. And, as it is easy to understand, indecision is not selective and applies perfectly, and to build relationships.
Each time little by little stepping on the throat" of male initiatives, you can easily bring the situation to the absurd, when all the issues will be solved only by you, and the man is the very embodiment of passivity and the lack of initiative.
Moreover, you can even not to disturb the man and not "crush" his initiative and the beginnings of responsibility, but at the same time will just do something he should do. It was he, and no other.
A typical example of this approach can be considered as any situation when the woman takes the initiative in establishing and maintaining contact with a man.As you begin to attack him with texts, calls and endless messages Vkontakte, you can assume that you have successfully coped with the task and transferred the man to another "mode".
Unfortunately, this mode is unfavorable for you because now you are the "locomotive" of your relationship, and it will be a passive passenger in the trailer you are pulling.
Here in this simple, uncomplicated way you can change a man for the better and he himself to this not trying, to throw the responsibility on you.
4. A tactical move
Finally, let us examine the fourth reason why a man can ignore you, even if he likes you.
The reason for this is however simple, equally insidious and it consists in the fact that the man is considering his indifferent behavior as a clever tactical move
What is the idea of such a move?
It's very simple. The task of man in this case is to devalue you as a woman. In other words, he wants to give you a feel for what "Not very much I need you...".
For men, unlike women, it is not so difficult task, because the dependence of men from relationships, as a rule, much lower than in women. It gives him the strength to intentionally show you that you would not need.
Using the fact that focus on relationships among women are much higher, many unscrupulous comrades to play with them in a very cruel, heartless game. They just devalue the woman, letting her know (through neglect, alienation and indifference), I don't feel interest in her.
It may take a while and you start to suffer from this, because you so wanted a warm, trusting relationship... And then your self-esteem naturally begins to fall, because you feel that nobody needs you, that he is indifferent to you, not much on contact, etc. Soul tears the desperation and the pain, and you start to think that you have something wrong that you are doing something wrong, if he behaves with you.
But it's just a cruel game with him. The goal of this game is to you yourself "hit the price". For example, to communicate with him did you rate it 95 points out of 100. And now, after I bought it ignoring? All right, you give yourself not 95 points, and, at best, 75.In this way men try to force women to lower their bar or, figuratively speaking, want to "roll them down" to your level.
The man does not want to develop and achieve you, because you have as many as 95 points – very close to the ideal. He understands that this is a very long, difficult and resource-intensive. And, a little, on reflection, chooses a much more simple way – "delete" your level at least up to 75, then to triumphantly turn up and get you at a "bargain price".
And, sadly, you are willing to give to this man, seeing in his face almost the Savior who came to "rescue you out of darkness", forgetting that it was he who cast you into that same "darkness". Just in order not to strain and feel like a hero, a liberator.
Sad story? I agree, however, I want you to stop and think.
Look inside yourself and honestly admit that the way it happens in reality.
It is not easy to accept and comprehend, but I sincerely wish that this knowledge fell into your heart and you will never "dump".Be for men high different ideal and help him gradually to rise to you, climbing higher and higher.
Two poles: the Arrogance and self-doubt
The effect of "soul mates" or be equal to itself
Don't you have to "fall in price", and the man should increase his value in your eyes – here is the correct prerequisite for building long-term relationships.
P. S. And remember, just changing your mind — together we change the world! ©