My wife found out about my little affair, and now she's given me conditions.

If a married man mistressIts future may develop as follows. First, divorce. Obviously, few modern women will forgive treason. And finding a new man today is not so difficult. The second option is to continue the marriage, but with conditions. Of course, the termination of the relationship with another woman and, possibly, taking a joint course with a family specialist in such cases.



However, there are exceptional options. When a couple stays together, at least officially. But in fact, the changes in their relationship occur at the most basic level, invisible to others. The alien family is dark, but sometimes, very rarely, through this veil, others manage to break through. Often these situations are unique and the most interesting.

There was a mistress I had somehow stumbled in my life, and in a big way. As a forty-three-year-old man, he met a girl in a little twenty-five. Here and there, we started our relationship. That's how I got a mistress. And it's against the background that I'm kind of married, a father of two sons, a loving husband. But then I didn't care about my family life, I just wanted to feel like I was on top. And for a moment it really was, until my wife found out about my adventures.

I will not talk about scandals and tears, it will take too long. I know that Lera thought a lot about our situation, what to do with the kids, how to share property and so on. I know because I have the ability to access her personal laptop, which means I'm aware of all the websites she visits and all the search queries in general. Believe me, this is easier than asking her friends about everything. Modern realities, so to speak.



Stable life. We live well. I have a stable job, a good position, a large number of subordinates. I provide for my family well and almost never refuse anything to my wife. But that's how it happened. “What now, to give up everything?” – so my friends told me, reassured me and promised that my wife would definitely not go anywhere because of such nonsense. “So what, that there was a mistress? Breaking up a family and giving up a good life? No, a woman would never do that.”

So I wasn't really worried at first. Giving gifts, flowers every day. In the mornings, he prepared coffee and a light breakfast, bringing it all to the door of her room (by this time Lera was living with the children in another part of the house). But it did not affect the situation at all, she did not want anything from me, but on the other hand, she did not go to dialogue at all. Soon, I began to hear her on the phone with some “specialist” about how best to arrange our divorce. Just like that.



Then we managed to talk normally, for the first time in a relatively long time. Discuss further actions and the future in general. My husband didn’t want to leave, I saw it. But either pride or a diminished sense of self-esteem prevented her from letting everything down. I tried to gently push the fact that in all the years of our marriage, this was my first mistake, and everyone deserves a second chance. Especially a confused husband. And then Lera offered me a deal that I readily agreed to. It was difficult to do otherwise at the time, because there was so much at stake.

In general, after six months of our contract and happy family life, I decided to tell you how everything is happening now. To be honest, this is a natural cry for help. Don’t sign business contracts you don’t read. And never promise the mother of your children something you may regret later. It's not a joke, it's not my rule to break my word. But I can't live like this.



In general, the first of my wife’s demands (and I fulfilled them all) was access to my phones. That is, she could literally ask me at any time to show her a list of the latest messages in social networks and instant messengers. Or ask what kind of person I have written under one name or another. Yeah, she never asked me about it in public, knowing it would hurt my status. But inside the walls of the house, I, as a man, very often had trouble. And it's just flowers.

Then we agreed to take some one-and-a-half-month courses with a therapist. Like, to understand how bad it is to cheat on a partner. I thought it would be typical nonsense like lying on the couch, staring at the ceiling and talking about your feelings. You know, right? Like they used to leave school after school. It was pointless and it took a lot of time. But in our case with the therapist, I didn't get off so easily.



Somewhere in the third session, he summoned some very thick thrower and made my wife and I listen to her screams about how she had been cheated and used by her ex-husband. And then I had to calm her down. In each of the following sessions, a new victim of male cruelty came. It's oblique, it's curved. They could not understand why they were cheating. And I had to pout for each of their exes.

Well, the last torture from my beloved wife, which will probably never end. I have to write her a few pages of text every week about my feelings for the two of us and everything I think about our marriage. I repeat, every week! And it must continue until Lera is convinced that I am 100% honest with her and realizes how low I have done. I mean, until the second coming.



I'm tired. I'm just tired of proving to myself every day what I'm still doing. For the sake of children, for the sake of marriage and the normal coexistence of two loving hearts. Mine and Lera. But maybe she stopped loving me a long time ago and just wants to torment me a little more? Otherwise, we live like a normal husband and wife, generally not bad. So why continue this abuse of a loved one, if I have already understood and understood everything? Are women so sophisticated that they just like to see us men like that? I think something needs to change. And fast.