I broke up with my mistress and can’t get her out of my head, even though I didn’t think I was attached to her. Bashny.Net

Finding a reason to leave a woman is a dilemma for millions of men around the world. It is relevant not only because of the fact of numerous betrayals. A man who regularly cheats on a legal spouse with the same passion often underestimates the serious risk. For a long time it seems to him that he will not become attached and will not fall in love. But reality hits him on the fingers with a pointer, and a nightmare begins.



What happens after the first serious quarrel and parting with a mistress? A man suddenly realizes that he is not so strong and unshakeable. The conflict puts him in his place and shows that he can no longer live as before. Love turned into a short leash with a spiny collar. Losing a woman who was good in bed with hurts.

After such stories, some macho begin to obligingly fulfill all the whims of their motherfuckers. They give jewelry and promise to divorce their wife. Others stare sluggishly at the exit. What if this is the right time to run away from this lady?



In the male Internet community there is a myth that you can end a relationship with a mistress in one hundred percent way. You just need to gradually cut off the oxygen. Less likely to meet, call and send messages. No more going to the movies, restaurants or mutual friends. Do not plan joint trips. Exclude deep spiritual intimacy, do not be interested in the state of health and affairs of each other.

Or the opposite: to become not apathetic and lethargic, but aggressive jealous. The man is sure that the mistress herself will do all the dirty work. For example, go to another partner, and the old relationship will come to naught.



Psychologists trumpet with one voice: none of these schemes work! They lead to suffering and suffering, mock the feelings of people. And the game of jealousy only inflames passion and further strengthens the bond. Such actions destroy the self-esteem of both sides. Especially for those who act through force and “kill” relationships. In fact, man is practicing self-destruction.

Why is jealousy not effective? There is nothing more repulsive than anger and rudeness. Because a rare man will be able to normally accept the fact of the connection of his partner with another. I mean, it's better than that. And even a conditional desire to leave the mistress here will not help. Hence the explosion of jealous anger. The result is even more attraction and a keen desire to return the fugitive.



Often such sudden changes in the behavior of a man with horror notices the wife. From this point grows 50% of cases when the spouse decides to go to another. The one who's already having an affair with another man. The family is on the verge of collapse. In the end, we have at least two unhappy people.

Let’s assume that a man was able to cope with himself and allowed his wife to leave his life. Unfortunately, such stress will affect his mind and body. First, the immune system will fall, then it will roll the blue and apathy. Against the background of psychosomatics, pressure will begin to jump, asthma, ulcers, skin diseases will decimate. Chronic diseases are worsening.



Even if the spouse manages to heal, his relationship with his legitimate wife can crack. Further events: depression, rescue in alcohol, the destruction of a career or the search for new mistresses. It’s a vicious cycle where nothing changes.

According to statistics, attempts to tie up with love on the side under the scheme of “slow distance” or “let him sleep with another” take years or even decades of life from men. And also provoke heart disease, strokes, chronic problems with alcohol and even thoughts to end life.

Male lovers who have tried several times to gradually “strangle” the connection on the side are the most difficult patients of psychotherapists. They resemble people who tried to get a splinter from a finger with a screwdriver or chainsaw.



Let’s assume that the husband decided in principle to stop all adultery – at his own will or at the request of his wife who learned about everything. To make this decision a reality, it is important to cut the connection abruptly and permanently. No implied agreements. We are not strangers, so we will sometimes write off, help, be interested in each other’s lives and jump into bed over old friendships.

It is extremely important to withstand complete non-contact with your ex-lover for the first three months. This is the most difficult time for the psyche. The brain begins to build new neural connections, develop new habits. That's why it's so important not to break.



Psychologists advise men not to waste their lives on dubious experiments with their psyche. Of course, it is better to avoid betrayal by the side. But if that happens, don’t reinvent the wheel. Millions of husbands who tried to part with their mistress according to their author’s method, lost their jobs, family, money, health and left this world prematurely.

Reasons to leave a woman on the side with a child Of course, it is not so simple. What if a man has not only a long-term stable bond with another woman, but also a shared child? We are no longer talking about adultery, but about the second family. Although unofficial, the mistress actually plays the role of another wife. At the same time, people are often convinced that the mistress is the real spouse.



In this case, throwing the mother of her child out of life is immoral. The child is not to blame for anything. He also needs care, education and financial assistance. We should cut off contact with his mother. At the same time, maintain a stable father-mother-child relationship.