Is it necessary to insist on the employment of the spouse? Bashny.Net

Despite the almost equal opportunities for building a career for men and women, it often happens that the head of the family takes on the role of a money earner. wife She remains the guardian of the family home. But is everyone happy?

Today's edition. "Site" He will share the cry of the soul of a successful (at first glance) man who manages to support his family alone, but he is not happy at all. And as long as the loved ones are totally dependent on him, he is totally dependent on long-hated work. A closed circle, but can it be broken without destroying the family?





I remember worrying the first time we met when we went to law school. You seemed like a ray of sunshine illuminating the nervous faces of people standing next to you. Your charm, kindness, friendliness could not leave me indifferent.”

“By the end of our studies, we were inseparable, and later we obtained a lawyer’s license and got married. The future seemed hopeless: two young, ambitious lawyers are building a strong family.”





“I set out desperately to build a career and worked hard. Constant stress and work late at night, because it is different for novice lawyers. But despite all the expectations, you didn't try to find a good job. As well as any other”.

“In the beginning, you took small part-time jobs to pay back your student debts, but such earnings would be suitable for someone without education and much stupider than you, and paid pennies for it. And then you got pregnant.

“We both wanted a child. And you did the most important thing in the world. Then we had our second child. You never got back to work. Even today, when our children are going to school, and the elder is already going to become a student, you continue to stubbornly preserve the family hearth.”





“We can relate ourselves to a middle-class family. We have a spacious house, we can afford to go on vacation every year. The children are fed and shod, and we have money set aside for their education. But at what cost did it come to me?

“I have more responsibilities and continue to put myself under tremendous stress. Those who have not seen me for a long time are amazed: they are even embarrassed to note how much I have aged. I don’t think I’ll be able to do that for another 20 years. I often dream of moving to a less responsible and calm position, and you can compensate for the difference in income by getting at least some work.





“I manage to help you around the house and participate in the upbringing of children. I think it would be fair for you to contribute to the financial well-being of our family. It would be easier if you helped me a little bit.”

“But you don't care. Even if the job destroys my health, you don't care. The main thing is not to work yourself. You go to the gym, spend time volunteering and questionable hobbies, gossip with girlfriends who lead the same lifestyle. I heard you complaining about financial problems. But what are you doing to help your husbands? ?





“I know that our family is better off than many. Millions of people work harder than I do, and many work harder than I do. But I'm not asking you to make millions. I only want to leave for a less paid position, but to maintain a comfortable standard of living for our family.”

“I don’t want to wake up at night thinking that if I suddenly lose my job, we will go broke. I want to feel the support of my wife, and not just in words. I'm tired of being a crowbar horse that drags both children and you on itself.”

“I want our daughter to have an example of a successful and self-sufficient mother, so that she takes care of her career and in the future does not depend on her husband as much as you depend on me. And most importantly, I want to wife began to work I’ll feel like I’m being loved, not just used.





Such a cry of the soul is familiar to many men. Some wives are so addicted. home-buildingThat unnoticed even for themselves turn the spouse into a kind of barrel of firewood: while there is something to sink, there is a hearth.

What happens to my husband? What if he, tired of such a life, went to look for another woman, more understanding and independent? Often, after the birth of a child, a woman lags far behind in professional terms from competitors in the labor market, but ambitions do not allow her to go to work. less-paid. Even temporarily. But stay at home, please!

Surprisingly, instead of a serious discussion within the family, the man writes a letter to the editorial office. The level of trust between spouses is so low that even a normal dialogue is impossible. What does it mean for these people, other than two children?