Psychologist Oleg Silyavsky about proper roles of men and women, the immutability of human nature and why pay for a lady of 40 sheep - it is right
Many couples today do not experience any pleasure from their relationships. Instead of enjoying life, people are trying to find out who should pay for what and why one has to earn more.
"Where is the justice?" - Miners male asked. "These characters have long disappeared", - complain of the fair sex. Correspondents Onliner.by talked to a coach, trainer, psychologist, teacher of the true essence, the director of consulting company "Workshop" Oleg Silyavskim about proper roles of men and women, the immutability of human nature and why pay for a lady of 40 sheep - it is right
A man should fully support a woman, otherwise it degenerates
- What should be the role of men and women in the ideal
- On their training, I often suggest that people imagine simple biological model. For example, is a house in the woods, live in it a man, a woman and five children - as it once was. And this implies all the roles, functions, investigators who as who should be treated, who is supposed to do.
Yes, in the material and social terms, everything has changed: people live in comfortable homes, do not have to chop wood, carry firewood. But at the same archetypal human nature remains the same. If people do not follow it, then the problems begin, certain defects:. Psychological, social
Generally, in the world today there is a clear distortion of the roles of men and women, this is for sure. Painfully people broke away from their true nature, they do what they want. Men forget their roles and responsibilities, women lose their ... In this sense, today is really a mess.
- If you follow your model, it turns out, the man should fully support a woman
- Of course, a must. Definitely. Otherwise he loses his masculine essence and degenerates. There is such a thing as a spiritual path, and everyone he should, he knows it or not. If a man does not realize his true biological function, its path, its psyche are distorted. It is the same with the woman.
- But is not a man that's got a woman
- If he's a man, he must first himself, his masculine nature and his spiritual path. The duty of man, his natural nature - is to be a warrior, defender, protector. And if he does not, he is not a man. Of course, a person can do otherwise. He's really owed nothing to anybody. But then let them accept the consequences of what he was doing, that he did not fulfill its specific purpose. And the consequences will be sad - both for men and for women who do not want to go the natural way
- What are the consequences
- For a man it is the destruction of business, loss of sense of life, depression, alcoholism, impotence. Options that nature has prepared the mass. In women, a violation of his nature and the correct spiritual path lead to the loss of beauty, weight gain, women's oncological diseases.
At first it all seems fun, especially at a young age. It is not yet caught up with these consequences ... Here in Hinduism and Buddhism confessed such a thing as karma. This is an excellent law in fact - the law of karma, or, as they call it, the law of universal justice
But even if you remove the mystical aspect of the question, the law of karma really exists. And there is not even necessarily result in all these stories about the Buddhist reincarnation. The law of universal justice works in this life. The essence of this law is very simple: the choices we made yesterday, define our lives today, the choices we make today will determine our lives tomorrow
Therefore, those people who today make choices against their true nature, can enjoy first, get a lot of pleasure. They think that they got rid of unnecessary obligations: provide a woman or support a family - a woman - be a man, maintain focus, to raise children. But a person can enjoy a year, two, three, and five it will catch up with him.
And eight is it so catch up, he will not find it. I have been practicing for twenty years, and as many destinies seen! It works like a clock actually, and people do not even suspect. They think the world is so, you know, do what you want in it. And it is not as simple as it seems.
- So, what is the true way of the men
- He's in the first place should be the case. For a man, it plays a crucial role. If he does not care, then it is deemed not to man. To say "profession" here is wrong. Is a businessman - this is a profession? Or an artist?
Again, in a simple biological model of the head of the family has to go hunting every day, or plow. Then he survives, his family survives. Therefore, the main way of men, spiritual development associated with just the same thing. This is the first priority.
A second priority - a woman. Because of the fruits of the business man should be, how to say it, get rid of. If men do not have a loving woman, then he begins life in complete nonsense. For example, he begins to reinvest the fruits of their labor.
So do many businessmen who have relations with the disorder. That is done by one business received dofiga money. Where to put them? It is necessary to invest in the next business. I invested in the next. Now, where to put them? After all, if a man is successful, created a business, then it makes two, and ten.
I thought I'd get rid of the attendants, and they became twice as large. It is necessary to do the third business! He bent all his life in these businesses survive, and then to 70 years will find that everything went by. The success was, and happiness-how was not, and no, he has built a career, something else did.
Therefore, every man should ideally have a woman who would let down his money away.
- That's a really down the drain
- Yes exactly. Women are drained of money, obviously. Only the first man to be earned. And it was in the traditional cultures are always indicated. Unfortunately, most of the traditional practices are lost in the modern world. But in some places there are still such a culture. For example, the East is still preserved the phenomenon of dowry. And rightly so, I tell you. This is very correct. Because if you can not pay the 40 sheep - you can not trust a woman
- And if a woman does not want it you pay for it 40 sheep
- And they have no such thing that a woman does not want. There's a different background. And man also sure that if he had paid 40 sheep, he knows exactly what a woman wants him and his children, and a kitchen. I saw it all with my own eyes.
- And the man, whether that gets pleasure from the fact that the woman pulls his money
- Of course, it's obvious. The ideal family - a family in which the woman does not know where the money comes from, and the man does not know where they go. In terms of money this is an excellent sample of the pair. The woman always have a lot of great ways to spend money.
The man does not know how to lower the cash just like that, he always said, thinking of how to invest better. It strives to ensure that all the time there was a profit to invested capital. A woman is easy to spend. Ring bought for 9000 dollars, for example. And it's still a little caught, should be 25, so that was a little more Brilliantik. Time - and 25 thousand there, flew on the wind
Money in this case - it is the continuation and implementation of male love. Gifts, flowers, houses, cars, fur coats, and specifically cash. If a man loves, he gives this woman.
- Why else would a man need a woman, but to lower the money
- In general, the woman for the man - one of the best sources of investment. Provided, of course, that it is a real woman. He was in it all the time something is investing, and she had all the time that something turns out. Once something is put - the children received, another time invested - the house turned. On the material level this is important.
At the social level - the status of, say, I have a woman, and the best and most beautiful. In addition, it gives the feeling of a reliable rear.
And what is the spiritual level? It is also very important. On the spiritual level, a woman helps a man in a very fundamental fact - in search of the truth. Men are always looking for the truth, all of them itching to do. That's why so many men of science, including Nobel Prize winners, for example?
Because they have this feature: they want to know how the world works, they want to find the truth. Academics, religious, even politicians and those in some way want to know, how this world, that they command. This is for men is crucial - the truth. And the main thing - the truth about himself. Find out who I am in this world. And this is a woman can tell. It speaks directly to words, who you are. Goat, for example.
And if you are lucky, he says. "You're my hero" And yet, the man immediately comes enlightenment. Only a real woman can give a man a true image that he is looking for. And give it in the way in which it should be, and I am a hero, I'm a winner, I'm the best in the world, because I love this woman, and she tells me about this
- Still, much has changed. Previously, the gentlemen got up, when the lady entered the room, and now is not accepted to give the girl a place in public transport.
- The fact that the classes are strongly moved. Who were these men in Russia? Basically officers, nobles. As Tsvetaeva "fierce one will you take the heart and the rock" ... and they behaved accordingly. But it's really been a man!
And then we have in Russia, almost all the men killed. For about a hundred years there was total genocide of the male population. See. The First World War, followed by the October Revolution and the Civil War - the destruction of all colors White Guard, the nobility. Those who were not killed, expelled from the territory of Russia.
But they were the best men are not only Russia - the world actually! Farther. Dispossession of kulaks - the destruction of the men in the village. Those who really could do something, to create a product to keep farming. Then after the Stalinist purges destroyed the Red commanders, I think the intellectuals and in general of all abilities. World War II finishes of all the others, who were the heroes and go to defend their homeland.
As a result, our women remained with anyone. Well, if the village was one man after the war. Women are accustomed to, it is necessary to do everything themselves. It's like in the post-war proverb: "I and the horse, ox and I, I and a woman and a man." After that, the next generation brought up in a distorted field: boys - in (also next to no men) infantile feminine way, and the girls - as a dray horse
And then this script is passed from generation to generation. And he is still in effect. Our women strive to be self-reliant. That Facebook has read recently. How to find a real Russian woman? Three step procedure. Set fire to the hut, disperse the horse, wait. [Laughs - approx. Onliner.by.]
Russian woman still strives for all to grab itself. "Can I have your bags brought it?" - "No, no, I myself." And there is nothing that man left, she would earn, she would raise the children. And he believes that it should be for it to applaud. In the past, yes, when there was no other choice, it was heroism.
But now the situation is different, full of men. And here we must not applaud, and tomatoes to throw it for what it is crippled children to life, because these boys are brought up without a father, do not know how to be a real man, and the girls do not know how to deal with the opposite sex. A vicious circle.
She did not need to applaud and say: "Listen, you sick, get rid of his idiotic script, attracting into our lives a normal guy. Do not you work three jobs and raise children. Learn to be a woman, learn to obey, obey, worship a man to admire him, and all you'll be fine. »
- That is a woman does not need to build a career, and should deal only with soup
- A woman can not build a career. This is not a woman's life. And a woman can not work. Female body is simply not designed for the load. Well let's see. Take here this box that you have in the editorial is worth, and Razikov 20 will walk with her along the corridor. At first I, then you. You will see what will happen.
Well it is not designed for the female body workloads. This woman should not work, it must be occupied, and the favorite. If it will bring her good profit, I'm all for it. [Laughs - approx. Onliner.by] But if it is not profitable -. It does not matter. A woman should not earn!
I do not mean that a woman can not receive money or other dividends - glory, respect, recognition - at the expense of social merit. Please, for God's sake, let him do whatever he wants. The main thing that it did not work for her. Because really know how to work, and only men can.
And women have not been established for this case. They have the body and the mind sharpened quite a different lesson. Primarily, this soup, you rightly said. Just do not to this so skeptical. Borsch - is a great thing. But here it is necessary to look wider. Not only soup.
It's like saying, if a man is projected only a hammer. Only narrow-minded cynics say so, that on the part of men, by women. Each has its own greatest role in this world. Borsch and a hammer - it is only the tools of the greatest role. The most important function of women, which includes soup - it femininity and motherhood, in the broadest sense
First you have to be a woman, and then, if it is able to attract and keep a man to start a family, it comes to motherhood. And if it is bad as a woman, and that a good mother would not. A femininity - it is primarily the beauty, the one that will save the world. In other words, a woman has two main functions: beauty and care, femininity and motherhood
By the way, they also can be constructed of any business. Women work out the best careers that are related to these fields. For example, the modeling business. Or restaurant, all kinds of clubs - where it is necessary to take care of customers. And when women begin to manage plants ... For this, I would say that we should have, but I will not with you. A woman of no.