In my books I have often described the features of neurotic personalities, their problems and difficulties. What sort of characteristics are absolutely normal people psychologically? What is the set of characteristics of successful, self-confident person? Let's understand.
Neurotics often see the world distorted through their feelings and experiences, formed in childhood. The neurotic does not like change and spontaneity, it is easier to live in a fantasy world, but it is very dependent on other people's opinion.
Psychologically healthy people - happy, busy in favorite business and develops. This happens when the natural - the body's basic needs are satisfied. Determining the needs and levels of Maslow identified, let's take a look at them.
1. Physiological needs - is the primary human needs for food, hunger does not think about anything except how to get enough
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2. The need for security - the desire to feel more secure. With insufficient satisfaction of this condition, a person delves into creating comfort at home, at work. He is afraid of change and permanence wants, fears and dangers of the world.
3. sexual needs - to satisfy this need - one of the pillars of human happiness. It is already apparent in adolescence, when, of course, the first need is normal. But often people are saturated with the need for food security, and with the help of other people - and there may occur a number of problems
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4. On the human level quad overtakes the need for love - each needs its own cell of society, family and loved ones who appreciate and accept. Man without family fills the loneliness and anxiety.
5. For a man it is important to be confident in yourself, it provides a realization of the need for recognition, which is divided into two levels - the need for awareness of its importance and prestige of the powerful and thirst. If a person loses self-confidence, he feels humiliated, perplexity, is also very bad for the health of dependence on other people's opinions, especially if it is the foundation of self-esteem.
6. Implementation of embedded in a person's ability. Maslow called self-actualization. The need for self-actualization helps a person to understand that he does not in the business, is not intended to him. And the man begins to look his way, because the musician has to create a song, the artist - painting, etc.
7. The need for understanding and knowledge - a human craving for new information. This need is not as expressive as the others, and her dissatisfaction also did not immediately evident, but can lead to big troubles. For example, if the intellectual development of a person engaged in a boring job, which does not develop his abilities and does not meet the need for new knowledge, sooner or later it will happen to be ill or nervous crisis.
Curiosity and a thirst for new most noticeable in children, and it is important to maintain this desire, rather than oppose it. In meeting the needs of the knowledge of the person realizes himself happy, involved in what is happening in the world and in life in general, if he touches the truth. Knowledge - is a kind of enjoyment from them increases mood, learning something, we become more developed and better, so you need to constantly feed your intellect a new piece of information
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The requirements are divided into lower and higher, Maslow identified the following differences between them.
High-level requirements are beginning to stand out from the development of the individual, that is, a number of needs peculiar to man, as he has intelligence. Physical needs are present in animals - in the food safety and sex, but the satisfaction is very different from the human - animals pounce on the food, dig burrows themselves wherever convenient. Man, however, is learning to work, earn money to feed themselves and to buy a house.
When individual development occur first lower and then higher demand. Newborn concerned only physiological needs, later appears the need for security, a few months later - the need for love. When these needs are met, there is a need for self-actualization, usually in children, it is detected early. It is important that the child did not try to remake the parents and teachers, because if the child wants to be an actor or an artist - so it should be
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Lower demand - it is just our physiology and the work of the body, so they dominate their dissatisfaction immediately noticeable. If the demand is very high in the structure of demand, it is not very important in the process of survival, and may long remain unfulfilled, with no threats to life arise.
The implementation of higher needs is the greatest joy and a large number of endorphins. If a person lives, considering and satisfying higher needs, he is less ill, quality of life is improved and its duration increases.
Recognize their higher needs - a difficult task, because they are not as obvious as the lowest. Therefore, to understand and identify them - this is a great achievement. When a person meets their higher needs, it is close to a state of harmonious personality, finds happiness and peace of mind, he feels that his life is so, what and should be.
If a person seeks to find and meet the higher needs, it leads him to psychological balance and health. To realize higher requirements need much more effort and training than the lower saturation. To a man thought to satisfy higher needs, requires a favorable environment.
All of us in childhood dream to be somebody, but if a child does not think about what he will be when he grows up, it means that all his desires and dreams so easily carried by parents that the child is deprived of his motive for the future. And it's very bad. Or other adverse conditions - when parents force the child to go to study for a utility, in their view, specialty, and people end up not getting what he really should be
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For the realization of the highest human needs - the most significant and for her sake he is willing to undergo various difficulties. As the level of the higher demand - in the person increases the amount of love. He is happy, and the number of loved ones is growing. And here we have in mind is love, not seks.Vysshie needs unselfish, it is their major difference from the lowest. The need for love leads to communication and relationships with people. Therefore, the realization of higher needs does the person better - and in civil and socially
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Implementation of higher needs - an important step toward self-actualization. Samoaktualizirovanny people happy and harmonious lives in peace with itself. Individualism - a consequence satisfy higher needs, the ability to love themselves, their lives are much more receptive to the psychological impact ney.Chelovek in high-needs
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A hungry man can not perceive psychotherapy. Lower demand has limited and clarity, and the need for them to satisfy the more visible and obvious than the realization of high-level requirements. Hunger is satisfied with food, but the need for knowledge is not filled with a certain amount of information, it is infinite.
Identify your highest requirements - a complicated process, but necessary, because of this depends on our health. It is important that people hear and know yourself, so before psychotherapy task is to help the person get to the truth, remove the clips and internal borders, a framework which we impose education in schools and institutions.
Author: Michael Litvak