Psychologist Oleg Silyavsky about proper roles of men and women, the immutability of human nature, and why pay for a lady of 40 sheep - this is correct!
Many couples today do not experience any pleasure from their relationships. Instead of enjoying life, people are trying to find out who should pay for what and why one has to earn more. "Where is the justice?" - Asked the male miners. "These heroes have long been gone," - complained the woman. Correspondents Onliner.by talked to coach, trainer, psychologist, teacher of the true essence, the director of consulting company "Workshop" Oleg Silyavskim about proper roles of men and women, the immutability of human nature, and why pay for a lady of 40 sheep - it is right.
What should be the roles of men and women in the ideal?
- On their training, I often suggest to people to provide simple biological model. For example, the house is on the edge of the forest, there lived a man, a woman and five children - as it once was. And this implies all the roles, functions investigation, as someone who should be treated, who is supposed to do. Yes, in the material and social terms, everything has changed: people live in comfortable homes, it is not necessary to chop wood, carry firewood. But this archetypal human nature remains the same. If people do not follow it, then the problems begin, certain defects: psychological, social.
Actually, in the modern world there is a clear distortion of the roles of men and women, it is for sure. Painfully people broke away from their true nature, they do what they want. Men forget their roles and responsibilities, women are losing their ... In this sense, today is really a mess.
If you follow your model, then, it turns out, the man should fully satisfy a woman?
- Of course, should. Definitely. Otherwise, he loses his masculine essence and degenerates. There is such a thing as a spiritual path, and each he should, whether he knows it or not. If a man does not realize his true biological function, its path, its psyche are distorted. It is the same with a woman.
He is a man that's got a woman?
- If he's a man, he must first himself, his masculine nature and his spiritual path. It is the duty of man, his natural nature - to be a warrior, defender, protector. And if he does not, he is not a man. Of course, a person can do otherwise. He's really owed nothing to anybody. But then let them accept the consequences of what he was doing, what he does not fulfill its specific purpose. And the consequences will be sad - both for men and for women who do not want to go the natural way.
What kind of consequences?
- For men, the destruction of business, loss of sense of life, depression, bezsilie. Options that nature has prepared mass. In women, a violation of his nature and the correct spiritual path lead to the loss of beauty, weight gain, women's oncological diseases.
At first it all seems fun, especially at a young age. It is not yet caught up with these consequences ... Here in Hinduism and Buddhism professed such a thing as karma. This is a wonderful law in fact - the law of karma, or, as it is called, the law of universal justice. But even if you remove the mystical side of the issue, the law of karma really exists. And then you do not even need to give these Buddhist stories about reincarnation. The law of universal justice works in this life. The essence of this law is very simple: the choices we made yesterday, define our lives today, the choices we make today will determine our lives tomorrow. Therefore, those people who today make choices against their true nature, can enjoy first, get a lot of pleasure. They think that they got rid of unnecessary obligations: to provide a woman, a family, or - for women - to serve man, to maintain focus and raise children. But a person can enjoy a year, two, three, and five is his catch up. And after eight it will catch up with him so that he will not find it. I have been practicing for twenty years and have seen so many destinies! It works like a clock actually, and people do not even know. They think the world is so, you know, do what you want in it. And it is not as simple as it seems.
What is the true path of a real man?
- It should first be the case. For a man, it plays a crucial role. If he does not care, then it's not considered to man. Saying "profession" here would be wrong. Is businessman - this is a profession? Or an artist?
Again, in a simple biological model of the head of the family has to go hunting every day, or plow. He survives, his family survives. Therefore, the main path of the male, spiritual development associated with just the same thing. This is the first priority.
A second priority - a woman. Because the fruit of their men do not, how to say it, get rid of. If men do not have a loving woman, then he begins life in complete nonsense. For example, he begins to reinvest the fruits of their labor. So do many businessmen who have relationships with the disorder. That is done by one business received dofiga money. Where to put them? We must invest in the next business. I invested next. And now where they do? After all, if a man is successful, he created a business, then make two, and ten. I thought I'd get rid of the attendants, and they became twice as large. It should be the third business to do! He bent all his life in these businesses survive and then to 70 years found that all passed by. The success was, and happiness-how was not, and no, he has built a career, something else did.
Therefore, every man should ideally be the woman who would later his money away.
That is downright to the wind?
- Yes, exactly. Women are drained of money, obviously. Only the first man to be earned. And that in traditional cultures has always been indicated. Unfortunately, in today's world, most of the traditional practices are lost. But in some places there are still such crops. For example, the East is still preserved the phenomenon of dowry. And rightly so, I tell you. This is very true. Because if you can not pay the 40 sheep - you can not trust a woman.
And if a woman does not want it you pay for it 40 sheep?
- And they have no such thing that a woman does not want. There's a different upbringing. And the man, too, is sure if he had paid 40 sheep, he knows exactly what a woman wants him and his children, and a kitchen. I saw it all with my own eyes.
And the man, whether that gets pleasure from the fact that a woman pulls his money?
- Of course, it's obvious. The perfect family - a family in which the woman does not know where the money comes from, and the man does not know where they go. In terms of money it is an excellent example of the couple. A woman always has plenty of great ways to spend money.
The man does not know how to lower the cash just like that, he always says, thinking how best to invest. It seeks to ensure that all the time there was a profit to invested capital. A woman is easy to spend. Ring bought for 9000 dollars, for example. And it's still a little caught, it is necessary for 25 to Brilliantik was more. Time - and 25 thousand there, flew into the wind.
Money in this case - it's a continuation and implementation of male love. Gifts, flowers, houses, cars, fur coats, and specifically cash. If a man loves, he gives it all a woman.
Why else would a man need a woman, but to lower the money?
- Actually, the woman for the man - one of the best sources of investment. Provided, of course, it's a real woman. He was in it all the time something is investing, and she all the time it turns. Once something is put - the children received, next time invested - the house turned. On the material level this is important.
At the social level - the status of, say, I have a woman, and the best and most beautiful. In addition, it gives the feeling of a reliable rear.
And what about the spiritual level? It is also very important. On a spiritual level, a woman helps a man in a very fundamental fact - in search of truth. Men are always looking for the truth, all itching to do it. That's why so many men of science, including Nobel Prize winners, for example? Because they have this feature: they want to know how the world works, they want to find the truth. Academics, religious, even politicians and those in some way want to know, how this world, that they command. It is fundamentally important for the man - the truth. And the main thing - the truth about himself. Find out who I am in this world. And this is a woman can tell. It speaks directly to the words of who you are. The goat, for example. And if you are lucky, he says: "You are my hero." And yet, the man immediately comes enlightenment. Only a real woman can give a man a true image he is looking for. And give it in the way in which it is necessary and I am a hero, I'm a winner, I'm the best in the world because I love this woman, and she tells me about it.
Still, much has changed. Earlier gentlemen got up when a lady entered the room, and now is not accepted to give the girl a place in public transport.
- The fact that the classes of strongly moved. Who were these men in Russia? In general officers, noblemen. As Tsvetaeva "fierce one will you take the heart and the rock" ... and they behaved accordingly. But it's really been a man!
And then we have in Russia, almost all the men killed. For about a hundred years there was total genocide of the male population. See. The First World War, then the October Revolution and the Civil War - the destruction of all colors White Guard, the nobility. Those who were not killed, expelled from the territory of Russia. But it was not only the best men of Russia - the world actually! Next. Dispossession - the destruction of the men in the village. Those who could really do something, to create a product to keep farming. Then after the Stalinist purges destroyed the Red commanders, I think intellectuals and generally all abilities. World War II finishes of all others who were heroes and went to defend the homeland.
As a result, our women were left with no one. Well, if the village was one guy after the war. Women are accustomed to, it is necessary to do the job themselves. It's like in the postwar proverb: "I and the horse, I and the bull, I'm a woman and a man." After that, the next generation brought up in a distorted way: boys - in the infantile feminine way (as men near there), and the girls - as the Drudge Report. And then this script is passed from generation to generation. And it still works. Our women strive to be self-reliant. That Facebook has read recently. How to find a real Russian woman? Three step procedure. Ignite hut disperse horse, wait. [Laughs - ed.]
Russian woman still tries to grab for all by herself. "Can I have your bags brought it?" - "No, do not, I myself." And there is nothing that a man had gone, she will earn itself will raise children. And he believes that it should be for it to applaud. In the past, yes, when there was no other choice, it was heroism. And now the situation is different, full of men. And then do not have to applaud, and tomatoes to throw it for what it is crippled children to life, because these boys are brought up without a father, do not know how to be a real man, and the girls do not know how to deal with boys. Vicious circle. She did not need to applaud and say, "Listen, you sick, get rid of your idiotic script, attracting into our lives a normal guy. Do not you work three jobs and raise children. Learn to be a woman, learn to obey, obey, worship a man to admire him, and all you will be fine ».
That is, women do not need to build a career, and should only be engaged soup?
- Women can not build a career. This is not a women's lifestyle. And a woman can not operate. Female body is simply not designed for the load. Well, let's see. Consider here that box that you have in the wording is and Razikov 20 will walk with her along the corridor. First me, then you. You will see what will happen.
Well it is not designed for the female body workloads. This woman should not work, it must be occupied, the favorite. If it will bring her good profit, I'll be alone. [Laughs - ed.] But if it is not profitable - it does not matter. A woman should not earn!
I do not mean that a woman can not receive money or other dividends - honor, respect, recognition - at the expense of social merit. Please, for God's sake, let him do whatever he wants. The main thing that it did not work for her. Because really able to work and may only men. A woman for the job to be created. They honed body and mind quite a different lesson. Primarily, this soup, you rightly said. Just do not this so skeptical. Borsch - is a great thing. But it is necessary to look wider. Not only is soup. It's like saying, if a man is designed only under the hammer. Only the narrow-minded cynics say so, that from men that by the women. Everybody has the greatest role in the world. Borsch and a hammer - that's just the tools this great role. The most important function of the woman, which includes a soup - it femininity and motherhood, in the broadest sense. First you have to be a woman, and then, if it is able to attract and keep a man, a family, it comes to motherhood. And if it is bad as a woman, a good mother and would not. A femininity - it is primarily the beauty, the one that will save the world. In other words, a woman has two main functions: the beauty and care of femininity and motherhood. By the way, they can also build and any business. Women work out the best careers that are related to these fields. For example, the modeling business. Or restaurant, all kinds of clubs - where it is necessary to take care of customers. And when women begin to manage the plants ... For this, I would say that we should have, but you will not. A woman does not.