Why are people really rude and what is behind it?

How to respond to the rudeness of a random counter without losing dignity? And what really lies behind the shameless behavior of people? That’s what I want to think about today!

Every person at least once had to face boorish behavior. And surely everyone at least once desperately wanted to answer the offender in the same way. But this desire usually occurs after the incident has exhausted itself. But at the moment of insult, many people are simply lost and do not find what to say.



To find an apt answer that would immediately restrain the impudent, usually prevents a strong resentment. Few people can respond to unfair treatment. Even if it concerns a casual passerby (whose words in theory should mean nothing to us).

It is especially difficult to abstract and soberly assess the situation, if in the words of the offender lies at least some truth. Then the words heard touch the living.



However, in this case, it is possible to get out of the conflict situation with dignity. How do you do that? Let's talk!

On the one hand, you do not want to descend to the level of a rude interlocutor. But on the other hand, I do not want the rude person to think that he is right in his statements and continue to behave in this way. So simply ignoring rudeness will not help much.



First, you need to understand why people allow themselves to be rude to you. Usually, caustic comments and uninvited toxic remarks are traded by those who themselves are mired in everyday problems and offended by the whole world.

Boorishness is primarily a manifestation of powerlessness, a kind of defense mechanism that turns on when someone is nearby who, in the opinion of the abuser, lives better than he.

The feeling of one’s own unrealization pushes one to look for flaws in other people. This helps people to justify themselves for their failure in some important area.



The most reasonable way out of the situation is to turn everything into a joke. If you feel that a rude person’s unpleasant words are somehow really about the truth, just accept it and smile back.

Let’s imagine how a young lady enters an expensive boutique and asks for help from a consultant in choosing a dress. To which the consultant only measures the girl with a contemptuous look and asks: “Are you sure you have enough money for such a purchase?” There is hardly anything you can afford in our store.”

And our heroine is really not from the richest family, saved up for this dress for a year and finally was able to afford it. Of course, she might just be upset that she was exposed. Like, really, where it is you stick, look at yourself - you go for a dress not in a prestigious boutique, and straight to the market.



Or you can just smile and say something like: “Yes, you’re right, I may not have enough money to buy it, but I can’t deny myself the pleasure of trying on this beautiful dress!”

Such a direct and honest response usually helps the hama realize that his defense mechanism can not be included in communication with you. In most cases, a person who has allowed himself rudeness, if he does not apologize, then at least he will become much more loyal to you in the future, since he will realize that he is no worse, and there is no one to prove his status.



At least, this method will work much better than the option of “indicate the impudent his place”, when instead of adequate dialogue, the buyer yells something about the duties of the consultant, and the consultant, in turn, rests on the horn and does everything possible to quickly escort the annoying customer out of the store.

What do you think about that? How do you usually deal with such incidents? Feel free to share your own stories of opposition to rudeness in the comments!