Why people love conflict Bashny.Net

"Conflict is a struggle that anything was done," says psychologist SERGEI SHVARATSKY. And this is what you need to think in the course of the conflict. And some advice for what to do in a conflict situation





People love to interfere. So like, go outside or look on the village — so village at least someone somewhere, and drat conflicts.
It's like even normal, for it is said by Hegel: all the same will not escape from a submarine! Conflict is an integral part of the universe.
But that's just love something like this thing, but do not know how much. It is that fans.
And even better to be able to. For.

And nuances-in this case a lot, but I'll explain one of the most significant moments.

People often don't even quite understand what they were engaged in the process of the conflict. And it makes sense to understand.
People often behave in conflict as if their main goal is to throw out each other's negative emotion. But this is not true. I mean, you could, but commercials, we will not go far.

And so the first thing here should once and for all to understand is what is the conflict. The conflict, if the release the whole thing from every husk is a struggle that anything was done. And in this light it is possible though all the possible words at each other to call and hundred, five hundred times in the process to each other and to take offense and to get angry and make up — it is all, ultimately, not important. Important — the search is done? Or not?

And that's about it and should not think in the course of the conflict. Not about how good people opponent. Or not.

Next. What prevents the main celebration is diverse right?
That's right: excessive emotions.

Because excessive emotion is very harmful for the effectiveness, as a hundred years teaches us, but still can not teach, curve Yerkes-Dodson. According to the second law of Yerkes-Dodson, "the more difficult for the entity running the activity, the lower the level of motivation is optimal for her". Proved by experiments, the Ministry of health says.

So the first thing to do in a conflict situation is to understand and keep in mind the purpose.
And the second is to turn off the emotions, and instead to include in a robot cleaner.

Which indifferently hums and goes along its path. As if there's no shouting or waving. Goes, of course, to make the case.

Plus this approach will bring you additional benefits. Which is that not everyone your opponent knows as well. He is likely to emocionante. And emotionwise people, as shown above, the irresistible becomes stupid and expects you to, first, the same emotsionirovaniya, purely by analogy. And secondly, expects from you in return is not a wide range of possible actions, like, maybe if oholonul. A narrow range, even extremely narrow, one or two options.

Not seeing the expected, he will regularly lose sense and do not understand what is happening.
That, of course, for the hand of a young puppeteer.

Use. And live more calmly. For your own benefit :)

source: livejournal.com

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