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Meet. This Is Lucy.



Lucy is the representative of generation Y: people born in the late 70's-early 90-ies. Now they are 20-30 years old, they graduated from universities and are now working. If they work in a big city and are engaged in intellectual work, they are called "Yippie" — young urban professionals, the young, employed city dwellers. Lucy is just like this.

Overall, Lucy all right. Why is she so miserable?

Let's do the origin of happiness. Surprisingly, the formula is simple:



Nothing fancy. If you expect more than you get — you're unhappy. If the opposite — happy.

It is interesting that objective reality plays a minor role. This in itself does not make people happy or unhappy — only in combination with expectations. If the child was expecting a birthday game console "Xbox", and got the bike "Merida", he is likely to get upset. If he waited even a bike, and got a whole real "Merida", it will jump to the ceiling.

With happiness understood: to be happy, it is necessary that the reality had exceeded expectations. Where did Lucy's high expectations?

To understand this better, meet her parents.

Parents



Grandpa and grandma Lucy — the representatives of the "greatest generation". They grew up during the great depression — the economic crisis in the United States in the 1930s In early youth they had seen poverty and unemployment. During the Second world war, they either served, or worked in a factory, where he met.

After the crisis of the thirties and forties of the military in America come the prosperous fifties: the real sector grows, we all have a lot of work, enough money. Veterans (then twenty guys) give preferential mortgage, American architects are beginning typical cottage development of the suburbs, young families appears affordable housing, cars, televisions, and other elements of the American dream.

Grandparents get married (EN masse, across an entire generation), and they have babies. Population explosion occurs — the "baby boom". America is filled with happy children of the fifties who see poverty only in documentaries.

Grandparents teach their children what is important in life — a stable job and sustainable income. They want in their lives, the food was good and the grass is green. And their children, parents of Lucy, grow up with the idea of a stable and durable career. Like this:





Lucy's parents know that they will get that green lawn. Just need to work a lot:





Parents have successfully recovered from a culture of hippies in the 70-ies and happily took up their careers. And then in the '80s and' 90s the U.S. the world is experiencing unprecedented economic growth. Is growing in all industries, money rod from all the cracks, only manage to earn.

Our heroes bold and confident people. They worked honestly and earned even more than planned. And the house I bought is better, and life is arranged more convenient. From this to the maturity they have developed a General sense of satisfaction with life:





The parents of Lucy was not before the eyes of the war and prolonged economic crisis. They believe that everything will always be okay — just need to work. And they raised their Lucy in the same tradition, but in a more exaggerated manner: if the possibilities are endless, and Lucy (and her peers) can become whoever you want.

Began the nineties. On the TV show the young "Backstreet boys" and live Cobain, and the little boys and girls absorb the idea that they are unique, their possibilities are endless, and for the life of them all the green light. Moreover, they are not perfect sad fate of parents who just achieved financial stability. Stability is boring. In life of generation Y must occur amazing things. On their lawn will bloom flowers:





Here is the first fact about Lucy is that it is important to understand:

Lucy prohibitively ambitious



Lucy and her peers do not just want a comfortable life and wealth. It is for them too small. If the parents of Lucy embodied the "American dream", then she will realize his own, unique, dream.

Writer and researcher cal Newport traced the growing popularity of the phrase "follow your dream" (follow your passion), which occurred in the last 20 years. Were used for the analysis tool, Google's Ngram Viewer: it shows how often in the English press found certain phrases. Compare how the falling popularity of "stable operation" (a secure career) and the growing popularity of "work for the soul" (a fulfilling career):









Need to mention: Lucy and her peers want material prosperity not less than their parents. But at the same time, they want the job rewarding. This "baby boomers" never dreamed of.

However, Lucy is not only prohibitively ambitious. From early childhood it rooted another idea derived from the parents:





And then it was time to talk about the second features Lucy and her friends:

They live in a fantasy world"Well, Yes, of course, everything we achieve in life is happiness and success. And all we will find a job and earn it. But I have something special. So, my way of life too going to be special, I will leave a mark in history and will rise above the crowd" thinks Lucy to class in College.

And here we have a whole generation of Lucia, who not only convinced that their lawn will bloom flowers. Each individual Lucy is convinced that once she finishes College, her lawn will be especially beautiful —

• above it soar the magic pony unicorn

This misconception will play against Lucy's cruel joke when she receives the diploma.

If parents Lucy was preparing for many years of hard work, she resides in the belief that she is special and wonderful work will be given easily. You just need to choose the direction of the shower and wait for her talent discovered. That's how Lucy sees his career on the senior courses of the University:





But, alas, the present work is the blood, sweat and tears, even if you are bucking on a colorful lawn with unicorns. To build nevedusya, but at least a sustainable career, it would take a lot of years of outstanding work. To this Lucy's life is not prepared. She had expected now a year, and it will become a new jobs-Zuckerberg.

But she will not, not strong enough. And she's not ready to accept it.

Professor Paul Harvey, a recognized lusive and a psychologist, explored the worldview of people of generation Y. He said that his representatives "have unrealistic expectations and unreasonably high opinion of himself" and "painfully resist criticism". "Not putting enough effort, these people, nevertheless, continue to expect serious rewards, writes Harvey, and continue to be disappointed".

Despite the fact that Lucy about yourself in the highest regard, the reality is your opinion. That's where our Lucy is two years after high school:





Our heroine has built unrealistic expectations, and, of course, disappointed. Due to the mismatch between expectations and the reality she is miserable.

But that's not all. There is another problem that aggravates the situation Lucy.

Over it all as if bulliedit is Clear that among the generation of parents Lucy someone richer and someone happier. But since most of the life these people lived without Facebook, they don't really know how you stack up the career peers. They lived and went about their business, looking at best on the lawn of a neighbor.

But Lucy is pursuing new-fangled social phenomenon: nonsense on Facebook.

Because of social media Lucy lives in a world where a) people are constantly publishing information about themselves; b) that they publish, often does not correspond to reality; C) mainly around share their successes, and keep quiet about the failures.

If you look at the Facebook page of a typical classmate Lucy, and there will be party, party, Dating with famous people, trips abroad, gifts from fans and expensive restaurants. And nowhere is written, that she really earns Cecilia in the club borrows money from parents, and these roses I bought for myself. It's called "image making".

Because of this, Lucy gets the feeling that all around everything is fine, and she's one so stupid, nothing in life is not achieved.





That is why Lucy feels out of place. And though she probably started her career very successfully, she suffers from feelings of worthlessness.

What I would advise the same as Lucy:

1. To be as ambitious. In the world of missing opportunities, we just need to take and to do. Maybe everything will turn out not as you planned, but something definitely will. The main thing — to do.

2. Cease to consider themselves special. The reality is that you are an inexperienced young man who have nothing to offer the world. Below this, there is working long and hard.

3. Do not look around. Now costs nothing to create an image of a wealthy and successful person. If your friends and acquaintances seem to be successful, don't rush to conclusions. Maybe they're just holding the IPhone at the correct angle. You also need to do their work honestly and from the heart — then no reason to envy others.published

 

 

See also:

No need to STRIVE, need to BE

YOU'll never forget IT

 

 

P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©

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