When you live a crazy life, every moment must be on the bill. You feel like a need to check something out of the list, staring at the screen, or to rush to the next planned location. And no matter how I tried to spread their time and attention, and how many different problems or trying to solve - I still did not have enough time to do everything /
Such was my life for two crazy years. My thoughts and actions are controlled by electronic notification, ring-tones, and filled to overflowing schedule. And although every fiber of my soul internal controller would find time for all cases in my overloaded terms, this did not work.
It so happened that six years ago I was blessed with a calm, carefree, stop-and-smell-rose baby. When I had to leave, she enjoyed searching brilliant crown in my bag.
When I needed to be somewhere five minutes ago, it required to fasten her toy animal to a seat I need avtomobilya.Kogda had a quick snack in Subway, she could not stop to talk with an older woman, like her grandmother.
When I was thirty minutes to reach somewhere, she asked me to stop the carriage, to caress every dog we passed. When I have been completely painted day from 6 in the morning, she asked me to break eggs to shake them very slowly and carefully.
My carefree child was a gift to my Type A, but I did not notice it. Oh, no, when you live a crazy life, you have tunnel vision, predicting just what is next on the agenda. And all that was impossible to put a tick in the schedule, it was a waste of time.
Whenever my child made me deviate from the schedule, I thought to myself: "We do not have time for this." Consequently, the two words that I most often say my little lover of life were: "Come on, quickly."
I started with these suggestions: "Come soon, we're late."
And it ends with the sentence to: "We all miss if you do not hurry."
I started the day with them.
Hurry up and eat your breakfast.
Hurry up and get dressed.
I finished the day with them.
Quickly brush your teeth.
Quickly go to bed.
Although the word "quickly" and "hurry up", have done little if anything to speed up my child, I told them all the same. Perhaps even more than the words "I love you."
Yes, the truth is painful, but true cures ... and brings me closer to that parent, I want to be.
Then, one fateful day, everything changed. We just picked up my older daughter from kindergarten and out of the car. This was not as fast as she wanted, and she said to her little sister: "What do you sluggish." And when she crossed her arms and sighed with disappointment, I saw it myself - and it caused me heartache.
I was a persecutor, is pushing, pressing and hurrying a young child who just wanted to enjoy life. I've seen the light and clearly saw the harm my hurried existence both of my children.
Though my voice was shaking, I looked into the eyes of my baby and said: "I am so sorry that I make you hurry. I like that you're not in a hurry, and I want to be more like you. »
Both my daughter looked equally surprised my painful recognition, but the face of the younger certainly lit glow of approval and adoption.
"I promise to be more patient," - I said and hugged her little girl-with-curly-hair, which now glowed with the promise to her mother.
Banish from my vocabulary the word "hurry" was pretty easy. But it was really hard, so it is to be patient, to wait for my leisurely child. To help us both, I started to give her a little more time to prepare, when we had to go somewhere. But sometimes, in spite of this, we will still be late. Then, I persuaded myself that I would be late, only these few years, while it is still small.
When my daughter and I walked and walked into the store, I let her set the pace. And when she stopped to admire something, I chased away the thought of my plans out of your head and just watched her. I noticed the expressions on her face, which I had never seen before. I studied spots on her hands and the way her eyes, narrows his eyes while smiling. I could see how other people respond to her when she stopped to talk to them. I saw how she looked interesting insects, and beautiful flowers. She was Noticer * (contemplative), and I quickly realized that The Noticers * rare and beautiful gifts in the world. That's when I finally understood - it was a gift for my frenzied soul.
I made a promise to slow down almost three years ago. And until now, in order to live in slow motion, I have to make considerable efforts. But my youngest daughter is a vivid reminder of why I have to keep trying. And indeed, another time, she reminded me about it again.
During the holidays, we went together for a bike ride to the tent with a fruity ice. After buying treats my daughter sat at the picnic table, admiring admiring ice tower in her hand. Suddenly, I saw the concern on her face: "I have to hurry, Mama?"
I could cry. Perhaps scars hasty life will never disappear completely, sadly I thought.
When my child was looking at me, trying to figure out if she needed now hurry up, I knew I had a choice. I could sit around and be sad, thinking about how many times in my life I customized it ... or I could celebrate the fact that today I try to do differently.
I decided to live in today.
"Not so fast, my dear. Just take your time, "- I said softly. Her face brightened instantly, and shoulders relaxed.
And so we sat side by side, talking about things being talked about playing-on-Hawaiian guitar-6-year-old-children. There were even moments when we sat in silence, just smiled at each other, enjoying the surroundings and the sounds around us.
I thought that my baby was going to eat every last drop, but when she got close to the end, she gave me a spoonful of ice crystals of sweet juice. "I kept the last spoonful for you, mom," - said my daughter with pride.
When I let icicles kindness quench my thirst, I realized that I had just made a deal of a lifetime.
I gave my child a little time ... and in return, she gave me her last spoonful and recalled that the flavor becomes sweeter and love comes easier when you stop so carried through life.
And now, whether it be ...
... Eating fruit ice;
... Picking flowers;
... Wearing of seat belt;
... Breaking eggs;
... Search for sea shells;
... Viewing ladybugs;
... Or just walk ...
I will not say: "We do not have time for this!". Because, in essence, this means: "We do not have time to live."
Stop to enjoy the simple pleasures of everyday life - is the only way to truly live.
Author: Rachel Macy Stafford's