Letter introvert Bashny.Net

Catherine Farhullina, "marketer-extrovert" and husband Terry introvert, wrote an article that encourages mutual understanding in the search when the difference in the nature of the partners seem to be an insurmountable obstacle.

blockquote> A man needs a man. Then life interesting. A doubly interesting if a man - someone with whom you share the joys and sorrows - a complete opposite of yours.



On the difficulties of understanding between introvert and extrovert not write except that lazy. But when these difficulties arise in love, your hands should not fall on whichever side of the fence you stand no.

A friend of mine once said that in ancient Sparta had no introverts. Because they just threw off a cliff. No stateechek their rich inner world and fine mental organization. No. With rocks - and that's it. "The ancient Spartans could not be wrong," - she summed up.

And if you look at it, somnolence, and militant, and do not want - from a cliff. What if you want to understand a little bit.

I'm an extrovert. For my chosen one that sounds like a "threat to peaceful co-existence of human beings." In order not to torment him with lengthy arguments and inferences, I wrote him a letter. Two. On his behalf, that he realized that I still understand what it. And his reply letter from you about what I do with it, such "internal».

Letter - the universal tool for communication with introverts.

They can read it when ready. Choose any convenient time and place (and state!).

They can not respond to the letter if you do not see fit.

They have time to think about the answer, the form does not require their momentary solution.

Perhaps this article will help those who are just as fond of the opening of its "closed" and vice versa. For extroverts, too, it is difficult.

Letter №1

«Hi, my name is Anton and I am an introvert.

Not that I had a problem with people (you and I, including). No. I just do not see the point in empty talk. Moreover, it exhausts me, drink all the juice. Even if it's you. Even if you land a spot on a new dress, and some insolent missed on the road (that bastard!).

I work a lot. I work with different people. It requires a lot of energy from me. Therefore, in the evening I needed a little time in silence, for a guitar, a TV or a computer. Or a long time. It all depends on my condition. When can I pay you time, I'll let you know. And no offense at me. This does not mean that I care about. I need space without people.

I can not call you several times a day. Because - cm. Above. Generally calls is not the case make me just an annoyance. Learn to call it a day, when you feel that I'm Burcu or more to remain silent. Be friendly with me when I still wanted to talk. Listen carefully as I listen to you.

I can not always tell you, I'm tired and I can not pay you time. Most of the time I just sat down and the battery must be recharged I "in itself." Try to understand it without words, one I mean, not to get me with, "What happened?" And "Why are you so sad?"

I immensely appreciate your concern. But, please, give me air.

Honestly, I admire your vigor, ability to communicate and have fun all day long, your positives. But sometimes (often!) Gets you a lot. And because I need to breathe.

I can not show their feelings as openly and vigorously. The only space that I have no men - inside of me. So, please, do not need to invade, do not break my balance. And I will repay you with care and loyalty - with what I pay for good to his attitude and love.

Be assertive and less aggressive. My brain is wired a little differently: I can as fast as you answer questions. But I will answer as soon as think. And it will be an honest and balanced answer. Appreciate it and give me time.

It's very simple - time and space - and we'll both be satisfied ».

blockquote> The letter №2

«Hi, my name is Kate and I am an extrovert.

Yes, I am the most that neither is a real extrovert gushing. My way of understanding the world - to communicate with other people. And if you by chance got into the cohort elected, I will direct the energy in your direction.

This means that I'm going to tell sea stories, share ideas and experiences, to cry and complain, disclose the soul. Especially knowing how you are able to listen and understand.

And sometimes it makes me hard if I can not share something with you. I find it hard to understand that you are not currently prepared to accept, because I was "bursting". I like an avalanche. Or volcano. This does not mean that I do not respect your space and your world. Just I have to throw out the information here and now.

If I love, I can be with someone 24 hours a day and give-give-give your love. Endlessly. I - an inexhaustible source of love and energy. And I think that you can do the same. After all, I have to be fed. And I feed off the emotions from the outside. Therefore, at least sometimes, for a while let me. You'll see, you'll like it.

If I stop you and do not give focus, just tell me about it. Say you're "in the house", you need time to rest. But do not forget to add that you come back. To me it is important. Otherwise, I feel very lonely.

Despite the fact that I have many friends and acquaintances around the innermost I share only with you. Therefore, it is important to me is your ability to listen, with all the "verbal diarrhea". I know I talk a lot, and often not the case. But so I arranged as I perceive the world. But I do not get bored with me.

I ask to show a little patience with me. I need to stop periodically. In the correct way. And I will repay your attention to the space. After all, when I know that you just closed up for the time that you come back and that the reason is not in me, I will be easier to you "let go" and do not irritate. Understand, become unnecessary fear or be the cause of your frustration is much stronger than the understanding that you should be left alone for a while. Be forgiving, and I'll be more careful. It's simple. One has only to want ».

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via factroom.ru