331
12 discoveries that will make a man to become a father
1. Apartment deadly
All objects lying below the level of your waist, will be either destroyed or used for mutilation. 90% of your cases, "education" a child - it's trying to save him from injury.
2. Sleep - a new erotic fantasy
Eight hours, unrestrained - it is more beautiful than to take a bath with Vera Brezhnev. At least in the dream you still have strength.
3. You have a nasty character
Do you recognize yourself in his moods, his perseverance, his harm. It looks like a little crooked mirror. At the same time understand what a pain in the ass you were for their ancestors.
4. But you will be ideal for the daughter
That you sformiruesh her taste for men. Try to match, if you want to you over time, a decent in-law.
5. Not everything depends on you
When you first dropped the baby head on the floor (not "if", namely "when"), you pray that all ended well. Even if you do not know a single prayer, and never in anybody did not believe.
6. You - 'bad' investigator
For two years the child learns to manipulate your wife, Putin turned the Duma. If you do not want to live with a small dictator, you yourself will have to command, punish and 50 times a day to say the word "no." The unpleasant part, but someone has to do it.
7. Free time - when he sleeps
The child - the employer does not know the Labour Code. Weekend for him there.
8. Small - does not mean quiet
Let it weighs six pounds - was upset, he masterfully plays the sound level of the Su-35 in attack mode. Yes, some still snoring in his sleep. Bass.
9. A good cartoon can be viewed 50 times.
10. You could negotiate with terrorists
"He does not want the street. No, he wants out. No, these gloves do not fit. No, it will not push through the handle to the cuff. No, he did not want out. This - my toy, although she a stranger ... "All negotiations - a soft voice, with a smile and diminutive suffixes.
11. Happiness is
The child is not only the truly experiencing what is happening, but also makes you feel very sharp joy, tenderness, affection. No matter how cynical you are, many of his actions and phrases you have to wipe the tears of emotion. And there is nothing to be ashamed of.
12. You have a horse and-ho-ho.
All objects lying below the level of your waist, will be either destroyed or used for mutilation. 90% of your cases, "education" a child - it's trying to save him from injury.
2. Sleep - a new erotic fantasy
Eight hours, unrestrained - it is more beautiful than to take a bath with Vera Brezhnev. At least in the dream you still have strength.
3. You have a nasty character
Do you recognize yourself in his moods, his perseverance, his harm. It looks like a little crooked mirror. At the same time understand what a pain in the ass you were for their ancestors.
4. But you will be ideal for the daughter
That you sformiruesh her taste for men. Try to match, if you want to you over time, a decent in-law.
5. Not everything depends on you
When you first dropped the baby head on the floor (not "if", namely "when"), you pray that all ended well. Even if you do not know a single prayer, and never in anybody did not believe.
6. You - 'bad' investigator
For two years the child learns to manipulate your wife, Putin turned the Duma. If you do not want to live with a small dictator, you yourself will have to command, punish and 50 times a day to say the word "no." The unpleasant part, but someone has to do it.
7. Free time - when he sleeps
The child - the employer does not know the Labour Code. Weekend for him there.
8. Small - does not mean quiet
Let it weighs six pounds - was upset, he masterfully plays the sound level of the Su-35 in attack mode. Yes, some still snoring in his sleep. Bass.
9. A good cartoon can be viewed 50 times.
10. You could negotiate with terrorists
"He does not want the street. No, he wants out. No, these gloves do not fit. No, it will not push through the handle to the cuff. No, he did not want out. This - my toy, although she a stranger ... "All negotiations - a soft voice, with a smile and diminutive suffixes.
11. Happiness is
The child is not only the truly experiencing what is happening, but also makes you feel very sharp joy, tenderness, affection. No matter how cynical you are, many of his actions and phrases you have to wipe the tears of emotion. And there is nothing to be ashamed of.
12. You have a horse and-ho-ho.
