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Not to be humiliated...
Strive for independence — don't lose out!
The ability to cope with the challenges in the way of challenges is undoubtedly a valuable skill, but it is possible and whether full independence from people and circumstances?
Life in society involves not only the individual path for each of us, but the crossing roads, for the harmonious development needs to learn to accept and give help, make connections, make friends, live in a family, to work in a team.
But because of the heart for the people, not as strong (not enough personal qualities), the coordinate system of life has gradually moved into the world of business interaction and creativity. Professional field are well organized in society, so a certain set of qualities and a certain sequence of actions in most cases, give predictable results, and in personal relationships, the risks of failure much higher.
The worse things in personal relationships, the more promoted the idea of "be independent, work hard and change the world", and often to similar slogans attributed to the theme of the shame and humiliation.
Build your business, not to be humiliated, asking your husband money to live separately, because such adult with his parents to live ashamed, keep a separate budget, not to be humiliated, discussing how to spend money this month. Buy an expensive car, not to be ashamed to come to work, take the credit, not to be humiliated, borrowing money from friends.
"Learn to do everything myself, do it perfectly, be higher than any of the unrest and trouble, don't get attached to places, people and circumstances have to be cool, otherwise you're gonna get the shame and humiliation..."
Articles, books, films call to mind the humiliation, fight, set the rules and make them adhere is a form of human interaction in the business world, not from the sphere of personal relationships. Game external rules, not internal. Yes, I agree that the level of development of the average person is not so high; to recognition of their own and others feelings, respect for boundaries, emotional sensitivity, freedom from violence and many other things we still have to go on and on, but often the focus is deliberately shifted the wrong place.
Defeat the enemies to take revenge on the enemies to carry out just retribution is cool, I admit, but as long as a person focuses on an external object against which it is necessary to fight the addiction is so strong that the freedom to not speak. Know the history of where a person life works three jobs to show your parents how good he is specialist, as it is valued, what they are stupid, not appreciated and not supported at the time? Or about the incredibly successful business built by a woman whose husband did not give money to care for themselves and children, and now she is happy, because not depends on it? About a teen who had nothing to eat since childhood and had to look for opportunities to provide for themselves and their paralyzed mother, and now he has become successful against all odds? Shame, fear, humiliation, pain, and other not the most pleasant components of the inner world often give more force to achieve,but in what becomes a path to the desired goal?
Want to get rid of problems — normally eager to help other people, that's fine too, to build his life on confrontation with any external enemy — too expensive. Struggle in some moments of life are inevitable, but we must look for opportunities to realize what is happening and to abandon the unnecessary consumption of resources.
Remember how much effort is spent trying to prove anything, confident in the correctness of the man who tries to understand the opponent's point of view. Even if defeated, even if we were right, but he is not, how much time and effort it took, was it worth it? Sometimes was worth, but most often not.No external design will not help a man to feel worthy, yet he won't deal with you inside.
And when you do, it is absolutely natural way to stop or limit communication with those who are trying to intimidate, humiliate, devalue or shame, cease to stand up for yourself, find effective ways to resist manipulation.
A Mature person knows how to select the appropriate in their environment way of communication, is able to understand the causes of their pain and at least try to stop going on about her, but the main efforts are aimed at creating a healthy supportive environment.
If the husband does not give money and manipulating pregnant or finding in the decree the wife, is it only that she has no income? It is not the income, not joint or separate budget, and in the relationship itself. In the system of values, respect, care about each other, which, apparently, in such a family just yet. And if you dig deeper, there are problems with self-esteem, initiations into male and female, parent-child relationships and much more. And with a single income can be humble, and independent business with no annoying husband to get into a situation where you'll be humiliated. With millions of accounts and the high posts and cool cars, you can never earn the approval of parents, recognition of the woman or their children.
The desire for absolute independence (financial, material, psychological) often leads to increased expenditure of time.
Three people decided to have dinner. If everyone would just do it for yourself, you will need to go to the store for groceries, cook meals and wash the dishes, and if they unite, then the distribution of cases will help to optimize the costs of time and money.
Major trends in society tell the person, "Prepare just for myself, so doing all the cool uncle and aunt", respectively, and the time for all out more. View, the more developed in economic terms, the society, the later created the family and children are born. It's not too big problem, but if you think well, more than anything we wish to spend more time with family and loved ones get upset when after 70-80 years of life, leaving us parents and grandparents.
Not because there upset that there was not enough time to reach the depths that it becomes a resource, regardless of the form of existence of the body?
35-40 earned on the car and the apartment, then had children and worked to pay the mortgage for a second living space, kids spent their days in school and the clubs (in order to be successful and not to be humiliated!), then they went to UNIVERSITY and left home, still need to travel, parents are 65-70, grandchildren a time to catch not catch, or not for long. Even in old age person can not relax, because in economically developed societies, you're supposed to save for old age, not saved — sorry, lost, children to support you are not required, but economically not too developed, it turns out that children are not especially the elderly need, because I need to find my purpose, make the world a better place and travel all over the world.Not whether such a humiliating state of Affairs for someone who considers himself the crown of nature?
Maybe not to humiliated, we have to evolve in some other direction parallel with the financial literacy and increase the material well-being? Can't it humiliating if the family and society, not every man for himself, and collectively to solve important problems? But if such a space around us yet, maybe we should engage in its creation? I wish you happiness!
Author: Dean Richards.S. And remember, just changing your mind — together we change the world! ©
Source: www.facebook.com/dina.v.richards/posts/10154576690829452
The ability to cope with the challenges in the way of challenges is undoubtedly a valuable skill, but it is possible and whether full independence from people and circumstances?
Life in society involves not only the individual path for each of us, but the crossing roads, for the harmonious development needs to learn to accept and give help, make connections, make friends, live in a family, to work in a team.
But because of the heart for the people, not as strong (not enough personal qualities), the coordinate system of life has gradually moved into the world of business interaction and creativity. Professional field are well organized in society, so a certain set of qualities and a certain sequence of actions in most cases, give predictable results, and in personal relationships, the risks of failure much higher.
The worse things in personal relationships, the more promoted the idea of "be independent, work hard and change the world", and often to similar slogans attributed to the theme of the shame and humiliation.
Build your business, not to be humiliated, asking your husband money to live separately, because such adult with his parents to live ashamed, keep a separate budget, not to be humiliated, discussing how to spend money this month. Buy an expensive car, not to be ashamed to come to work, take the credit, not to be humiliated, borrowing money from friends.
"Learn to do everything myself, do it perfectly, be higher than any of the unrest and trouble, don't get attached to places, people and circumstances have to be cool, otherwise you're gonna get the shame and humiliation..."
Articles, books, films call to mind the humiliation, fight, set the rules and make them adhere is a form of human interaction in the business world, not from the sphere of personal relationships. Game external rules, not internal. Yes, I agree that the level of development of the average person is not so high; to recognition of their own and others feelings, respect for boundaries, emotional sensitivity, freedom from violence and many other things we still have to go on and on, but often the focus is deliberately shifted the wrong place.
Defeat the enemies to take revenge on the enemies to carry out just retribution is cool, I admit, but as long as a person focuses on an external object against which it is necessary to fight the addiction is so strong that the freedom to not speak. Know the history of where a person life works three jobs to show your parents how good he is specialist, as it is valued, what they are stupid, not appreciated and not supported at the time? Or about the incredibly successful business built by a woman whose husband did not give money to care for themselves and children, and now she is happy, because not depends on it? About a teen who had nothing to eat since childhood and had to look for opportunities to provide for themselves and their paralyzed mother, and now he has become successful against all odds? Shame, fear, humiliation, pain, and other not the most pleasant components of the inner world often give more force to achieve,but in what becomes a path to the desired goal?
Want to get rid of problems — normally eager to help other people, that's fine too, to build his life on confrontation with any external enemy — too expensive. Struggle in some moments of life are inevitable, but we must look for opportunities to realize what is happening and to abandon the unnecessary consumption of resources.
Remember how much effort is spent trying to prove anything, confident in the correctness of the man who tries to understand the opponent's point of view. Even if defeated, even if we were right, but he is not, how much time and effort it took, was it worth it? Sometimes was worth, but most often not.No external design will not help a man to feel worthy, yet he won't deal with you inside.
And when you do, it is absolutely natural way to stop or limit communication with those who are trying to intimidate, humiliate, devalue or shame, cease to stand up for yourself, find effective ways to resist manipulation.
A Mature person knows how to select the appropriate in their environment way of communication, is able to understand the causes of their pain and at least try to stop going on about her, but the main efforts are aimed at creating a healthy supportive environment.
If the husband does not give money and manipulating pregnant or finding in the decree the wife, is it only that she has no income? It is not the income, not joint or separate budget, and in the relationship itself. In the system of values, respect, care about each other, which, apparently, in such a family just yet. And if you dig deeper, there are problems with self-esteem, initiations into male and female, parent-child relationships and much more. And with a single income can be humble, and independent business with no annoying husband to get into a situation where you'll be humiliated. With millions of accounts and the high posts and cool cars, you can never earn the approval of parents, recognition of the woman or their children.
The desire for absolute independence (financial, material, psychological) often leads to increased expenditure of time.
Three people decided to have dinner. If everyone would just do it for yourself, you will need to go to the store for groceries, cook meals and wash the dishes, and if they unite, then the distribution of cases will help to optimize the costs of time and money.
Major trends in society tell the person, "Prepare just for myself, so doing all the cool uncle and aunt", respectively, and the time for all out more. View, the more developed in economic terms, the society, the later created the family and children are born. It's not too big problem, but if you think well, more than anything we wish to spend more time with family and loved ones get upset when after 70-80 years of life, leaving us parents and grandparents.
Not because there upset that there was not enough time to reach the depths that it becomes a resource, regardless of the form of existence of the body?
35-40 earned on the car and the apartment, then had children and worked to pay the mortgage for a second living space, kids spent their days in school and the clubs (in order to be successful and not to be humiliated!), then they went to UNIVERSITY and left home, still need to travel, parents are 65-70, grandchildren a time to catch not catch, or not for long. Even in old age person can not relax, because in economically developed societies, you're supposed to save for old age, not saved — sorry, lost, children to support you are not required, but economically not too developed, it turns out that children are not especially the elderly need, because I need to find my purpose, make the world a better place and travel all over the world.Not whether such a humiliating state of Affairs for someone who considers himself the crown of nature?
Maybe not to humiliated, we have to evolve in some other direction parallel with the financial literacy and increase the material well-being? Can't it humiliating if the family and society, not every man for himself, and collectively to solve important problems? But if such a space around us yet, maybe we should engage in its creation? I wish you happiness!
Author: Dean Richards.S. And remember, just changing your mind — together we change the world! ©
Source: www.facebook.com/dina.v.richards/posts/10154576690829452
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