The practical lesson to identify life values from Jack Makani.
Taking important life decisions such as changing jobs, moving, beginning or ending a relationship – we used to rely on logical arguments. We are eternally in your head, possible options, weigh the pros and cons, some of us even like to make long lists of pros and cons.
Thirty six million seventy eight thousand five hundred sixty five
However, when it comes to really important decisions, this strategy does not always work. At the heart of our life-motivation are values:
- what we think is important;
- what gives us the energy to live, to undertake efforts to achieve the goal;
- something without which life disappear from joy, excitement and pleasure.
Whether happened in your life situation when you took a very rational decisions from the point of view of practical benefit seemed to be the most "correct and promising", but in the end cause you only frustration and dissatisfaction?
This is because our values have nothing to do with rational thinking and logical arguments
. When a child wants ice cream, two plombing ball in a waffle cone – this is what will make him happy and satisfied! Of course, he can renounce his desires and to obey the rational arguments of the mother that ice cream to him there is bad. As a result, the child will get external approval and to feel "good boy", but will he really happy?How often in adult life we similarly sacrifice what you really want, giving "rational" arguments?
In this article I want to share with you very simple and important rule for making decisions
. It consists of the following:
- It is impossible to understand their values, thinking about them!
It is impossible to solve logically, like we do we the other person; we can understand whether communication with them is profitable and promising, but it is not associated with sympathy and pleasure from communication. It is impossible to understand what I really want to do with my life, by analyzing the difference of the average incomes in these areas.Our values speak to us through our emotional responses through our heart.
- Paying attention to your feelings, we can understand whether we want to be with that person in the relationship. Whether these relationships something to resolve conflicts and omissions, to abandon part of his favorite habits, to compromise?
- It is our internal state tells us if we like our job – do me to her sense of wonder, the feeling that I'm doing something of value and wish to develop further? Or most of the time, despite a stable income, I feel depressed, see no prospects, and generally not sure if somebody needs what I do?
Forty nine million one hundred twenty nine thousand seven hundred twenty fourIn making important life decisions should be 2 stage: Stage 1.Taking the decision to primarily focus on their values
– feelings and emotional reactions that you experience when you think about each of the options. In this step, temporarily disable the "reasonable arguments" that are usually dictated by fear and inner critic. Make a decision based on their values. It means "follow your heart".
Stage 2.When a shared decision has been made, be sure to include logical thinking.
Now you know what you really want. Ask ourselves:
Knowing that I want (the solution from the first stage) and given the circumstances of life in which I am now like me to realize their desire the most constructive and environmentally friendly way?
In answering this question – use the rationality, practicality and wealth of life experience that you have.This algorithm will allow you to make decisions in accord with their values, and at the same time, to use your logic and rational thinking to realize them.
Periods of changing values
And another important point about values. Most of our values is stable and does not change during life. However, almost each of us can experience in life one or two the tipping point, when our values change
. When comes a time that we are experiencing temporary confusion. It's like we're pulling in different directions.On one hand
there are the usual life that is before us. But now, what used to bring joy and satisfaction ceases to delight and fill them with enthusiasm, we seem to lose interest. From other side,
begins to occur a new strange desire, a dream. But this new desire causes a lot of issues and anxiety – is uncharted territory and it can be a lot of dangers and troubles.If you feel that your life has come to a period, it is very useful to explore our values.
Practical exercise to identify their values
- To understand which of them began to move to the fore.
- Why did they become important to you?
- With what feelings they are associated?
- And through what practical steps and solutions you can implement?
Thirty seven million eight hundred fifty nine thousand two hundred seventy four
Take a sheet of paper and make sure that within 30 minutes you will not be a distraction.Step 1. List the leading areas of your life
The scope can be different:
Step 2. Identify the values in each field
- Family and friends
- Body and health
- Material welfare
Choose the life area that you think is important at the moment. Start to ask yourself questions:
- "That for me is really important in this area?»
- "What to me really matters?»
- "What do I want? What's in it for me?»
- "Without what I feel unmet in this area?»
Write down the values relating to this vital region.
Values commonly are expressed in form of words or short phrases. You can discover your values by simply asking yourself these questions. Just keep asking yourself and, as a result, will receive a list of your values. Sometimes the list contains about 7 values, and sometimes 25. There are no rules about their number.
Step 3. Rank the values in each field in ascending order of importance
Go through your entire list and start to arrange them in ascending order of importance to you. Ask yourself, which of values is the most important, and place it in the first place.
In the same way sort the entire list. Very useful to know the three most important values in each of the living areas as they give us a large part of the motivation.
If these values are not realized in your life, there is frustration and dissatisfaction. If you have identified such a situation, it's time you do something with this particular area of life!
Step 4. As you can realize your value?
In the process of this exercise for you to become more intuitive your life motivation. Now you can start to set ourselves specific and practical objectives – a plan for how to realize their important values in life.published
Author: Jack Makani
P. S. And remember, just changing your mind — together we change the world! ©