The same love of children does not happen... Bashny.Net

The same love of children does not happen...One of the most strange to me phrases is: "I love all my children equally". I never understood, because I have not.

When is the birth of my daughters, I immediately realized that there is no same love for them I will not.

They behaved in different ways. On-to a miscellaneous reacted to me, my actions, my voice, my touch. Developed not the same. Both my twins girls are healthy, but they are from the first day of their life, began to live each in its own way. Start with the fact that Mary shouted with the first breath like a cut. But Lida didn't even Wake up when she got out of me. So we immediately realized that they are very dissimilar, our identical twins.

Mary fell asleep faster, Lida slower.

Masha more shouting, Lida — more smiled.

Masha always attack, and Lida has always tried to shy away from conflict.

I was very surprised when I said, "But you love them equally?!". Of course not.

In Lida, for example, I was terribly annoying when she whines and Mary — when she loves. But Lida touches me deeply — to the feeling of hot boiling water in a chest — to tears — that runs up and swung hugs me when I come home from work, and Masha amuses me terribly when she mimics Borka or just Hamming. She makes this hilarious.



Borka I especially love differently.

First, he's a boy.

How can a boy and a girl to love equally? How can man and woman be treated equally? After all, everything is different: the smell, the habits, reactions, the way to perceive the world and react to it.

Secondly, he's a Junior.

That is the moment of his birth I have imagined what a newborn infant. I have had experience caring and communicating with the first children with whom I was very afraid to do something wrong, and just two and a half years mortally wanted to sleep. And, having Borka, who slept and ate again, and ate and slept, and no cries, no snot, no problems with the teeth, there are no problems with his tummy and colic — so, after quite a restless Gemini is a very peaceful Borka, I felt much calmer than first children. It also influenced my love for him, for what she grows.

Further — more.

It turned out that communication with Borka develops quite differently from communication with the girls. Because he is Barca or two.

For example, he knows all my machines without exception. And Lida after a couple of days won't know just seemingly given her the doll. And Maria and all at once will throw your doll in the closet, and starts taking Lidino.

At the rink, Mary is selfless to write pirouettes and not pay any attention to your drop (often quite painful), Lida will be whining that the ice is not the same, not the weather and all the shoes badly laced, and Barca just sit in the snow and begin to dig their own cave.

At home, Barca will want to wash your hands immediately, Lida — after one reminder, Masha and the snake will turn, but the hands won't wash.

These are my children, all three of them. And they are so unlike each other that I really don't understand how you can love equally? And, most importantly, why?

Why lie to yourself and them that I love them any one, abstract, all egalitarian sense of some unknown to me, equal love?

Because I love their completely different, in a different color painted, different sounding love?

My love to Lida — a bright, fierce, respectful, loud, orange. In the lead I was always confident, she's my assistant, my friend, I can rely on. She is so like me that sometimes I even wonder what am I supposed to explain something. I have it now, in its nine years, is perceived as a very adult person.



My love for Masha — quiet, excited, interested and a little cautious, all softly, and for some reason blue. Masha's great to have fun, spend money, have to whisper, she always surprises me — my Mary. And I never know what she will come to a head in the next minute. She will be offended or get mad. But almost always know how to please.

My love for Borka — tender, hot, calm and vast as the ocean or the sky.

And I every child is different, I change depending on with whom I communicate. With Barca I softer and softer. Lida — simply and openly. Masha — quiet and attentive.

It is three different feelings for three different people, who happened to be born my children.

Each of which I have their own, separate, not common to all relationships. And it is impossible to fit them into the one size fits all "equal love to all children" — in order, ostensibly, that they were not hurt, that was not jealousy, one that does not allocate.

On the contrary — I try to highlight each of the children (not so much me — only three!), with each of themto build their own, individual relationship that each of them feel as loved as brother and sister, and the favorite. published

 

Author: Katerina Antonova

P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©

Source: ponaroshku.ru/blog/ya-lyublyu-ikh-po-raznomu-odinakovoy-lyubvi-k-detyam-ne-byvaet/