The General case of spouses seems very tempting. In many countries, still any business family, although usually referring to the fact the male part of the family, and the woman is just beside and helps.
We have the same phrase "family business" often means doing it together, the husband and wife. So tell us about it.
Olga ValyaevaI must say that far not all of it is necessary and useful.
My husband and I work together in different projects, almost all the time married. What we just did! Engaged in the development of portals about the trainings promoted the sites, organized and conducted training sessions, and now publish books. We even once worked as a Santa Claus and snow Maiden (it was funny). In our case, it's kind of inevitable. Otherwise – no.
There are lots of advantages to this situation, large security, for example. It is no coincidence that many of the singer is married to his producers. It harmoniously, the wife will not go away and the money is not framed. Also it is very much unites and brings together.It gives many reasons to know each other better and deeper. And sometimes this is shown astrologically, and the only way the family can be saved.
But not everyone can handle that. Why is it difficult?1. A confusion of roles.
Like joking about my husband: he gave a scolding to the author, who holds the manuscript, and then you wife dinner not cooked. Where's the connection? It seems that it is not, and it is. It is difficult to switch from role to role.
It is difficult to separate wife from himself-employee, and husband-the husband from the husband of the chief. Not to collect all in a heap and where about the case, not to mix emotions.
There are more reasons for quarrels, and in the confusion of the roles — the tension builds.
It's hard not to resent her husband when a publisher criticizes your text. And you as the author understands that the publisher's rights. But you as a wife are very offended at her husband — he's a friend! How could he? Similarly, the husband, when the author against any changes suggested by the publisher, the husband resents his wife's not listening. A madhouse, in a word.
Family business difficult for the ego.
Always someone is a facade and someone is inside. And it's hard. Where ever you are. When you mean easy to become high and mighty, forgetting that this is a General work and when you are somewhere inside, it is a shame that you and the work that nobody notices.
When my husband was engaged in the portals of training, it knew me — no one. The letter I sent with our working drawer, and there they were just "administrator". And it hurt, I told him, like, you go there and talk, drink coffee, and I'm working! I am doing optimization of the website, providing content. And I see you and thank you. Although the husband did a lot, and to sell our services was much more difficult than to copy and format text.But my ego suffered.
Today the situation is different. People see my name on the cover of books and not realize that the book is a lot of different people, and most of all does my husband, without whom these books would not exist. Yes, nothing would. They do not know and that I in addition marania paper not doing anything, because I have a house and kids and the husband works constantly. And always something comes up.
And to balance it inside is not easy. We have a long history of supporting the idea that each of us does the job that add up to one big total.For the benefit of others.2. A conflict of interest.The chief aims of the work efficiency, so every employee he wants to get the maximum possible.
That is, in a sense, the Manager wants each child to "squeeze" the maximum. For a common cause.The husband wants the wife had enough strength for everyday life and home.
And if he and the chief and the husband? Then, on the one hand wants to do more, better and in General, and on the other hand want house wife is loving and full of energy. And how to be? What to prefer? The efficiency of the total business or the harmony of the home? How to combine and find a balance? Difficult. It is very difficult. Both. 3.Not rest from each other.
You're home, "at work" you again. Some live in such a regime is very difficult, especially if a little common interests, not friendship and partnership. We laugh that even my husband goes to work and thereby to have a rest from me, he again have to deal with me because he works with the publishing and sale of books I wrote. He has to choose my photos, pick my texts, he constantly sends questions about me — how to contact me and consult why I have someone banned and so on.In General, and I'm at home and at work — me too. And I have exactly the same.4. Who's in charge? Who decides?
If you two can't agree, then what? Well, when there is a third, whose voice can be combated. And so it turns out 50 on 50, and without obvious and the only leader to go forward is impossible. But who are they?
Short-sighted woman in this place your true self, your experience, skills and ambitions. And then the family is falling apart, unable to withstand such pressure. And business is falling apart, and the family. Losing everything at once.How can that be?
It is understood that this is a common thing you do together.And make decisions is not based on ego — who is more important and cooler, and is better for business.
In this respect the issue all possible.
Important mission of your activities. If both of you are working not for themselves and not to just to buy a house, and the world want to change for the better — the atmosphere inside is quite different.Some have such a General case is necessary in order to remain husband and wife
(this is our case). When you work together for the good of other people, your energy is spent so that you have no time to quarrel and sort things out. And this, incidentally, is one of the ways to keep the family together, if astrologically there are problems with the marriage.And for us pros are still more than minuses:
- we have something to discuss at any time – the curtains, the children, books;
- common cause unites, and it is very valuable;
- the opportunity to see each other from different sides — and more cause for admiration;
- distributed energy, which is too much;
- a common cause is able to reconcile, because there is no time to quarrel: we started to discuss work and quietly reconciled;
- limitless personal growth and working with ego.
If you think this way, weigh the pros and cons and try something small.
Check how comfortable you two to do together is not so easy. My husband recently joked that now he understands why Batman works alone:)And try! Do not try — do not know. The main thing that you both wanted and were ready for it.
Author: Olga Valyaeva
P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©