Deep on the surface

Self-made man. Now, however, increasingly self-made woman. At the end of the Soviet time this expression came to us with Hollywood movies, books of Dale Carnegie and Coca-Cola. It is clear, of course, that self-made country and people must be appropriate. But I'm not talking about America. I'm talking about the expression: it is the proportion of the wickedness, unrighteousness. Not even the fact that man is always someone to help; sometimes that does not work or is not strong, he does not notice or care... I mean, even if you do yourself, it is always with someone. In varying degrees, of course. This is a platitude. But there are platitudes that you realize only with age.

You grow up, make a career, create a family... do you think you're a self-made man: self-made and that's it... But then at some point begin to understand how much and how many people you have. It is not even about gratitude. You weren't ungrateful. Talking about how everything is connected with each other: people, relationships... And start to look differently at the closest. On teachers. Parents. On the father. And when he become a father.

Today I see that my behavior and attitude towards others — this is the model that I perceived from my father. Of course, dad better, kinder, more powerful, but my "relational" self-made with it. Since childhood, I remember dad talked to people at work, in the store, on the street, at the gas station... And perforce imitate. Of course, in its own way. But he.

And now I understand that what will be my yet small children, largely due to the way I behave. And in any situation. Because other popes have not. It is clear that even with a good parent, even knowing, as it should, not always does it appropriately: justified fatigue and lack of energy, shrugs off some requests for the child, not paying for something... But in the end, who knows, whether there will be even small, seemingly bad moment in the child's memory for years to come?.. Count Leo Tolstoy was beside myself with two years. I remember childhood episodes-flashes. Fortunately, mostly bright and light. And they are always close. First and foremost — a mother and a father. How our today will be remembered by my children?..

Here's another platitude: for parents of children always remain small. Sometimes jokingly, and sometimes with irritation, I remind their parents: "what do you mean, I'm already in the forties!" In General, they themselves, being the ninth and eighth tens, understand that you're not 15, and that they have their own children... But how can pass the parent-child relationship — to surround with care, to defend, to protect?

But the converse is true: for children parents will always remain "older", older. And you always want to hide somewhere from them, and quietly once the soul from the mere awareness that they were there. Until the next... Such a deep sense of security. No cold wind, no frost is not terrible, because dad is always near, and will close by itself from the wind and say, "Cold, son? Let hands warm!"published

Author: Vladimir Legoyda

Source: foma.ru/gluboko-na-poverhnosti.html