Seventy six million one hundred sixty thousand eight hundred thirty four
About 100% of the wives, whose husband suddenly left her for another woman, turn to "grandmother" to remove the "spell". When illusion is vital in magic will believe almost anyone, the only question is, how is the question of life and death, how bad mentality to cope with stress. The stress from the recognition that the opponent was better, so great that it is easier to believe in witchcraft than that.
To admit their own little importance to whoever is entirely dependent self-esteem, like death.
If a loved one rejects you the recognition that you are not good in his eyes, a disaster, because those eyes define your value as a whole and the General, that is for you, too. The only way to believe that the eyes clouded spells, powerful external influences, against which the beloved could not resist. Options such as the char in the range.
Most women in this case, accusing gloss or porn, and men – feminism or a soap Opera.
If the husband is displeased with his wife, the wife thinks that it is a gloss, which convinced him that the woman must have fantastic proportions, perfectly smooth skin and feline eyes, and even white teeth, eating a diamond necklace. The glossy propaganda's fault that men look at their real wives gloomily. There is a feeling that in a time when men were passionately in love with, their wives had otvetstvennyy skin, redrawn proportions and a diamond necklace. Or before marriage, men are never held in the hands of glossy magazines and did not open Internet pages, so do not see "real women" and was stupid enough to marry an imperfect wife, and then saw saw the light. But it is not so? The man ceased to please his wife and so he was dreamy to look at photos of beautiful women who in life had never seen and did not want to see, not yet felt the need to escape from the marriage. Dreams magazine images is the first stage of marriage depression stage two – when the husband begins a dreamy look on real women, imperfect and even the most common finding and also prettier than his own wife. The second stage is worse than the first, so the gloss is not the biggest enemy.
Men criticize feminism, which has taught women that they have the right to demand a lot and give little. If not for feminism, more wives would watch for their appearance and better prepared, and feminism dissuaded them to do it, and therefore, the family is the collapse, and the children suffer. Either a guilty soap Opera, suggesting that men ought to wear of the wives on hand. However, feminism and soap Opera did not appear suddenly, both of them older than wives, and this did not prevent the wives more recently, to look for husbands love and try to look good. Isn't it? The woman looks at her husband unhappy, not because feminism has brainwashed her brain. On the contrary, "feminism" (or TV shows) became the outlet she found for herself, when there was a resentment at her husband. He was often to admire the beauties of coffee, and it communicates sparingly and is not as romantic as once, and most importantly he's been very support, so the wife's anger and(or) depression.
It is not excluded that did not begin with the husband and wife. At first the wife began to accumulate fatigue, she looked at her husband with displeasure and speak with him impatiently, so he became less help, stopped to look at her as a defender and began to watch porn. She often nags him that he is lazy, and he snarls that she's fat. She blames the gloss, and it is feminist. In General, no matter who started, they both turn on.
External locus of control does not allow to solve any problems and even social problems, which seemingly are always outside, better be solved if people come together with internal locus of control, and I think in the context of "what to do?"not "who is to blame?"But every time I mention in the comments about the underflow in a pair of one or both, I answer that it is a gloss spoiled men (pornography, gender, the Russian mentality, etc.), and women ruined feminism (soap operas, gender, Europa, etc.)
Of course, on men effect of porn on women soap Opera, and those are influenced by the genders, but it is more affected to their original installation is what they dream about before marriage. Men dream about sex and attractive women's bodies, women about romance and reliable men's shoulders. This is not to say that men are romantic and women are against sex. Just the accents are different, but this is an average, and in particular men who think more about romance than sex, and women think more about sex than about romance. That is, gender only sets a General tendency, and does not put the individual into a rigid narrow framework. The framework is there, but they are quite wide and plastic.
If a man chose a woman, and the woman took the man, that means no gloss, no feminism, not against it. So the woman the man seemed attractive enough, and the man to the woman as a reliable. Please note, the gender difference goes along the lines of desire-security. Men, on average, more important than the first, women, on average, the second. It is influenced by gender, and it is useless to scold, you just need to consider in my life. And if you really want to get rid of difference at the group level, it is necessary to pay attention to the reasons(!) this difference, not the difference. For example, it is useless and even dangerous to deal with the need of women safety. Can you deal with the reason women have more anxiety and insecurity than men. Women focused on the mandatory physical and material dependence because of the maternal role. With greater dependence should fight, encouraging women to develop their own support to parenthood and during it, as well as actively involved in the parenting of men, and in any case not to deal with the need of women in security, which is expressed in search of a strong shoulder. If ridicule and deny the love of women to men of reliability, helping to develop their support, nothing good happens, and it will only get worse.
The same applies to the needs of men in female attractiveness. It looks like a sinister objectification, but it's always been a necessary and integral condition for what constitutes "masculinity" and the duty of men to ensure women's "strong shoulder". While defenseless women, and men, on the contrary, no weakness and dependence does not allow, the only dependence that can make men precipitously towards women and to take responsibility for themselves (to contain them and protect) it is their sexual attractiveness. Men in relationships with women actualizarea psychic sphere that is responsible for desire and passion, that is what makes them attracted to women, despite the cult of male authority, to run after them and fall in love. To this point, it became less important, but proximity has not lost its relevance, men have, on the one hand, need in getting women to do something other than physical pleasure (friendship, partnership, cooperation), and women must be in a lower economic dependence. Genders leveled slow and fast attempt to deprive people of the gender features becomes a struggle with the consequences, not causes, and aggravates the causes. If defenseless women were not allowed to look at men as a support, they fled in fear into sects and are looking for support there, if masculine men are forbidden to look at women as sexual objects, they go away... Yes, the war and looking for the realization of passion in there. They and others often go into depression, unfortunately, because a vital need in the face of an insurmountable obstacle, lead to frustration and strong frustration to the blackout.
This does not mean that the vulnerability of women and their sexual objectification need to be encouraged! Neither encourage nor prohibit, but simply to recognize that the reasons for this lie not on the surface and destroying the surface manifestations, we can ensure that the root causes will give much more sinister sprouts, and past seem flowers. Is always softer to look at things and to delve deeper into their causes. And those who look at the phenomenon of anger, and I do not see the complexity and ambiguity of reason, in vain pretend to be objective views.
In short, do not blame the genders and Garou, if a husband or wife broken relationship. Cause of the disorder is that initial expectations are not development and you need to think about how to adjust their expectations closer to reality, and how to realize at least part of the expectations of a spouse. I mean, Yes, wives should be loyal to treat the needs of men in female attractiveness and sexuality, ceasing them is to hate, and men must remember that women need support, not only financial, but purely physical, that is significant assistance for child care, for example, and need to increase their stability (work) so not too much to expect from men.
In addition, it is important to note that no appeal will not be if a woman was criticized for appearance, attractiveness is stimulated only admiration. And assistance on the part of men not to if to scold him for what he is a slacker, and no thanks for the help. Any activity is stimulated by promotion, that is a high estimate and a proposal in response to do what a person needs. If you try to stimulate activity threats to take away and what is available, people will look for ways to reduce their need that he threatened to take away. Men turn to porn, women to the idea of separation. From the situation of a whip and the people and animals seek to escape by finding the unthinkable loopholes.
People only stick. This well proved the best known psychologist Kurt Lewin, conducted many experiments. If you create the conditions of great pressure, people will still try to escape, or at least in the madness. Anyone wants a mass psychosis? published