“Don't know”, which does not need to be afraid Bashny.Net

The expectation of a second child raised in me a joyous and painful memories of how he was acquainted with the first.

I remember being at home with a small bundle in his arms, I was dismayed that such a complex is probably the most complex mechanism in the world has not made any statement.

In search of such valuable and missing young mother-to manuals on how to survive with a child, and most importantly, how not to ruin it, I went to many consultants and books. But... the Consultants have offered diametrically opposed solutions, and the books described are irreconcilable and warring techniques. And I desperately wanted to get a single, simple and clear, logical guide to action... I remember this perfectionist desire to be prepared, understand how to act, feel educated, secure and confident, was draining me and took a lot of time and effort.





When I look at the last three year, I know I was looking for a non-existent magic pill for the inexperienced, insecure parent.

Now I'm waiting for the second child, and often ask myself the question – why wait? I would now not prevent the perfect guide, now, however, for nurturing two children. But it is curious how evolved my mother's brain. Now the questions about how it will arranged my life how I will feed, bathe and swaddle a baby, with whom and how to send it out, and how will I do to live with it, I began to answer – don't know.

But that's not what nerve “don't know” when you say it and want to move up to my chair and dropped to his impotence. And “don't know” is a completely different kind. “Don't know” calm, confident, strong, open and thorough. “Don't know” – when you realize that nothing can know about what will be your baby, but you will cope and everything will certainly sooner or later will be fine.

Now I understand more and more that parenting, motherhood is a delicate fine work on that with strangers at first person. A person with emotions, preferences, desires. A person with a unique character and set of qualities. Personality that does not fit in any Handbook, guide, manual.

This does not negate the basis of interaction – breast milk, mother's proximity and hands, sharing a dream. But things have to spend a lot of time acquainted with a new person and understanding how to negotiate and interact.

I really don't know how it will be, and what kind of person will come and decorate our house. I expect it will be difficult, unclear and insecure. But don't expect the magic of the universe tips and instructions on how to deal with it. And believe in the unknown a sensitive mother's heart, that will love, learn, and learn to speak the same language with this new little stranger. And in the flow of love and creativity we'll look at how we all have to be together. published

Author: Maria Nikonova

 

P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©

Source: alpha-parenting.ru