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38 Hard Truths About Real Relationships
Our culture creates false expectations about intimate and family life. But real life is not just about joy and happiness. It's just that mass culture has created a distorted set of expectations. We wait for candy and romance, and we get difficulties and quarrels.
The truth is, relationships are not easy. They're never easy. Relationships require compromise. They want to harm their interests in the interests of your partner. Our culture has taught us that love is a feeling. But the reality is that love is actually action. We always have to prove it in practice. That's the only way she can live.
Here are 38 tough truths about relationships that will help you form healthy expectations.
1. You will not always like your partner.
2. You won’t always feel attracted to your partner.
3. Sometimes you will be very annoyed.
4. You won’t always miss each other when you’re separated for a while.
5. Sometimes you will get bored together.
6. You will meet people who you think will be “better” at times. 7. Sometimes you will feel very lonely.
8. Your partner is not your clone. Reconciling differences can be difficult and tough.
9. Your heart will open and close.
10. Sometimes you will feel attractive, sometimes not.
11. Your sex life can be difficult. It's normal.
12. You won’t always want to have sex.
13. Sometimes you may feel indifferent to your partner.
14. Sometimes you will feel very connected to each other. Sometimes that feeling will leave you.
15. True love is a struggle, not just a pleasure.
16. True love involves fear.
17. Fear doesn’t always look like fear.
Sometimes you will be afraid to feel indifference, irritation or indifference towards your husband/wife.
18. The deeper the love, the greater the fear.
19. The deeper the love, the greater the risk.
This means that you realize that you may lose him/her.
20. Sometimes you will think, “I want to leave.” I want to try something else. I want to try someone else.”
It's just thoughts. Their appearance is natural and happens to everyone. But that doesn't mean those thoughts are true. Most often, they are the product of fear.
21. Doubtful thoughts (like those discussed above) tend to come to you when you're alone in the house. Or when your partner's asleep.
Remember, true love is always the swing of a pendulum. Today you feel that you can not live without this person, and sometimes you want to never see him again. The greater the experience of living together, the easier it is to accept a reality and a “cell” called “family.”
22. You will be surprised at how difficult it can be to negotiate with your spouse.
Many people inevitably compare their relationships to those of others. But be very careful: we all post only the best moments of life on social networks. And if your friend began to live with a charming girl with an appearance like Angelina Jolie, it does not mean that everything is smooth and as in the photo.
23. Conflict is inevitable.
24. You always seem to be better/fairer than your partner. 25. You may occasionally lash out and insult each other.
26. Sometimes you will hurt each other.
27. There are too many ways to break each other’s trust. Don't swear.
28. No matter how you want it, you will bring the past into your relationship too: the pain, childhood grievances, the pain of past relationships, the pain of betraying friends and girlfriends.
And you will inevitably project that pain onto each other. We are all just a mirror of our inner world. And in this mirror, there is usually no less bad than good.
29. Marriage isn't everything.
He doesn't solve any problems. You both have a responsibility to continue to grow and develop in order to make your relationship stronger.
30. Once you have children, you will have to get used to the fact that not all your needs will be met in the first few years.
The feeling of love for children will have its ebbs and flows. Relationship dynamics are not always the same. Children will inevitably change your daily routine. Not in your favor.
31. There is no doubt that living with young children is a difficult task.
Hold on. They'll grow. It'll be easier.
32. Sometimes you will feel only rage, resentment and the feeling that you and your contribution are being seriously underestimated.
Consider these thoughts as part of spiritual growth.
33. You will have to become an adult, a serious person.
34. Sometimes you have to swallow your pride and apologize first.
35. You will miss out on vacation opportunities.
Once the two of you are together in the same family, you will realize that a solid, sustainable financial foundation under your feet is more important than entertainment.
36. Romance doesn’t necessarily go away over the years.
You just have to learn to support her.
37. You will feel offended.
You will have to find ways to heal from past grievances. This is the only way your relationship can grow stronger.
38. You'll grow old together.
You will witness the ageing process. It is much easier to watch another person than to watch yourself.
Your wife will sooner or later have folds, sagging body parts, scars. This can be a source of grief and disappointment. And it can be a source of joy: if, of course, you celebrate and be proud of how long you have been together.
After reading this list, it becomes unclear why people agree to long-term relationships. Isn't it easier to be alone?
Yes, it is easier, safer and less risky. But a close, intimate relationship, the opportunity to love and be loved, is an opportunity for you to grow significantly above yourself before.
Relationships are a gift and a privilege. Which, however, not everyone knows how to use. And the main mistake of most people who decide to divorce is inflated expectations. And the unwillingness to sustain growth and invest in relationships.
So keep this list somewhere. We remind you that life is not an ideal. It's better. Published.
P.S. And remember, just by changing your consciousness – together we change the world!
Source: lifter.com.ua/38-gestkih-istin-o-realnih-otnosheniyah
The truth is, relationships are not easy. They're never easy. Relationships require compromise. They want to harm their interests in the interests of your partner. Our culture has taught us that love is a feeling. But the reality is that love is actually action. We always have to prove it in practice. That's the only way she can live.
Here are 38 tough truths about relationships that will help you form healthy expectations.
1. You will not always like your partner.
2. You won’t always feel attracted to your partner.
3. Sometimes you will be very annoyed.
4. You won’t always miss each other when you’re separated for a while.
5. Sometimes you will get bored together.
6. You will meet people who you think will be “better” at times. 7. Sometimes you will feel very lonely.
8. Your partner is not your clone. Reconciling differences can be difficult and tough.
9. Your heart will open and close.
10. Sometimes you will feel attractive, sometimes not.
11. Your sex life can be difficult. It's normal.
12. You won’t always want to have sex.
13. Sometimes you may feel indifferent to your partner.
14. Sometimes you will feel very connected to each other. Sometimes that feeling will leave you.
15. True love is a struggle, not just a pleasure.
16. True love involves fear.
17. Fear doesn’t always look like fear.
Sometimes you will be afraid to feel indifference, irritation or indifference towards your husband/wife.
18. The deeper the love, the greater the fear.
19. The deeper the love, the greater the risk.
This means that you realize that you may lose him/her.
20. Sometimes you will think, “I want to leave.” I want to try something else. I want to try someone else.”
It's just thoughts. Their appearance is natural and happens to everyone. But that doesn't mean those thoughts are true. Most often, they are the product of fear.
21. Doubtful thoughts (like those discussed above) tend to come to you when you're alone in the house. Or when your partner's asleep.
Remember, true love is always the swing of a pendulum. Today you feel that you can not live without this person, and sometimes you want to never see him again. The greater the experience of living together, the easier it is to accept a reality and a “cell” called “family.”
22. You will be surprised at how difficult it can be to negotiate with your spouse.
Many people inevitably compare their relationships to those of others. But be very careful: we all post only the best moments of life on social networks. And if your friend began to live with a charming girl with an appearance like Angelina Jolie, it does not mean that everything is smooth and as in the photo.
23. Conflict is inevitable.
24. You always seem to be better/fairer than your partner. 25. You may occasionally lash out and insult each other.
26. Sometimes you will hurt each other.
27. There are too many ways to break each other’s trust. Don't swear.
28. No matter how you want it, you will bring the past into your relationship too: the pain, childhood grievances, the pain of past relationships, the pain of betraying friends and girlfriends.
And you will inevitably project that pain onto each other. We are all just a mirror of our inner world. And in this mirror, there is usually no less bad than good.
29. Marriage isn't everything.
He doesn't solve any problems. You both have a responsibility to continue to grow and develop in order to make your relationship stronger.
30. Once you have children, you will have to get used to the fact that not all your needs will be met in the first few years.
The feeling of love for children will have its ebbs and flows. Relationship dynamics are not always the same. Children will inevitably change your daily routine. Not in your favor.
31. There is no doubt that living with young children is a difficult task.
Hold on. They'll grow. It'll be easier.
32. Sometimes you will feel only rage, resentment and the feeling that you and your contribution are being seriously underestimated.
Consider these thoughts as part of spiritual growth.
33. You will have to become an adult, a serious person.
34. Sometimes you have to swallow your pride and apologize first.
35. You will miss out on vacation opportunities.
Once the two of you are together in the same family, you will realize that a solid, sustainable financial foundation under your feet is more important than entertainment.
36. Romance doesn’t necessarily go away over the years.
You just have to learn to support her.
37. You will feel offended.
You will have to find ways to heal from past grievances. This is the only way your relationship can grow stronger.
38. You'll grow old together.
You will witness the ageing process. It is much easier to watch another person than to watch yourself.
Your wife will sooner or later have folds, sagging body parts, scars. This can be a source of grief and disappointment. And it can be a source of joy: if, of course, you celebrate and be proud of how long you have been together.
After reading this list, it becomes unclear why people agree to long-term relationships. Isn't it easier to be alone?
Yes, it is easier, safer and less risky. But a close, intimate relationship, the opportunity to love and be loved, is an opportunity for you to grow significantly above yourself before.
Relationships are a gift and a privilege. Which, however, not everyone knows how to use. And the main mistake of most people who decide to divorce is inflated expectations. And the unwillingness to sustain growth and invest in relationships.
So keep this list somewhere. We remind you that life is not an ideal. It's better. Published.
P.S. And remember, just by changing your consciousness – together we change the world!
Source: lifter.com.ua/38-gestkih-istin-o-realnih-otnosheniyah