To hold onto the relationship at any cost, is it worth? Bashny.Net

With sufficient experience, now I'm sure I don't need to hold on to the marriage with his last strength, if you there bad. In fact, I didn't stay when they realized that the causes of our disagreement is so deep that you don't fix them and do not agree. So, too, sometimes.

I think that it is not necessary to attempt to establish impossible to justify karma, astrological compatibility, or something else. It's all unprovable things, and your life is real. It's one thing when you help the sick and the afflicted spouse, and another thing, when you pull a perfectly healthy, successful person. Especially when doing this, if you are not asks. Learn to be happy here and now – your main goal in life.

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People are not static nor intellectual nor psychological terms, being, so to change beliefs – this is normal. Before you through the n-th number of years of marriage or relationship the question may arise, to live with a new content person or not. Sometimes you accept it, accept it, sometimes changing ourselves and sometimes it comes in sharp confrontation with the fact that you know about the world, about relationships, about parenting. A compromise is possible, but not always achievable. Moreover, if mutual concessions are destroying the identity of the partners, they are not needed.

For example, men have a Patriarchal family model in mind, but my wife was at her closely. She wants more of a partnership. How to reconcile, if he believes that he is the only true model of the family?

Or, for example, one of the partners had sexual contacts on the side. If the other person can not accept this fact, and it is not consistent with his understanding of the family, whether it is necessary to constantly remind about the incident and harass each other? Perhaps, after a time, this obstacle will not be so insurmountable, but now people are ready ready to something. And maybe with this situation the other person will not accept never.

Healthier for the psyche to find a new partner with similar values than to break itself for the sake of others.

There is another aspect: her husband and father – different roles of men in the family. To expect from the father of the manifestations of the husband, if he doesn't want, doesn't understand how it is, empty. And even more pointless to make an adult a husband who exist in your head. The happy developments are only two: either you change the ideal image in your head and accept the partner with all its features, or looking for someone more appropriate this way. But certainly it is not necessary to alter partner. You will become evil Pillai, and he is elusive Ghost. Help him, if he so wishes, to realize the father's role, will facilitate a life as possible, and as husband – leave alone. Have it your way. His time of reflection and personal maturation.

Take care of yourself! Take care of yourself on physiological, psychological, and mental levels. Revolving around its axis, you will attract everything you need – money, love, attention, and care.

Upon marriage, the people had their family scenario: how will they live, who and how will work out how many will be children and how to educate them, and so on. And these scripts could be very close. But over time, the vision of the partners, his life changed. They had other dreams and goals, and implement them with a real partner was unreal. Well, we have to admit that the history of these relationships have ended. Anything you could give to each other has already happened. I once sunk into the soul of the statement of Alla Pugacheva: “I was flying through life like a space ship, and my men fell off a ladder of the ship, giving me speed.”

To establish a relationship only when they are needed by both partners, with no need to assess the words and actions. If contact points are not, if long conversations lead to nothing, if you no longer appreciate each other and lost the value of your relationship, if you go to a family psychologist want only you, and the partner does not see the need to thank each other and move on. This stage of your life completed. It was a good experience, then it will be new. You will be happy.

Please note that all articles written what to do but not told how. The specific tools depend on the person and his problem.published 

Author: Lilia Ahremchik

 

P. S. And remember, just changing your mind — together we change the world! ©

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