"Like a stone wall": everything is good, nothing good
I remember the way Lyudochka of "Pokrovsky gates", which was all so unexpected and contradictory. In principle, exactly adjusted to the differences in appearance, look women and girls who espouse a position of "I don't want to decide anything, I want a new dress". They are slightly hysterical and definitely immature.
For some reason they have not grown and have remained little girls. Most likely, this girl was the Pope, who completely dominated the house, and the word across to tell him it was impossible. Or she grew up daddy's Princess, all desires which are met "the first peep". That is, in her mind there was a watershed: there are grown men who make decisions and do things and there are little girls, from which in this life do not depend.
Thirty seven million four hundred ten thousand eighty one
These girls woke in the morning, were given clothes, fed Breakfast, transplanted from the pot on the sled, with the sled on the swings, took them for the vast majority of decisions, because parents know better and unless there parents bad advice. Oftenm choose and friends, and school, and then University, and profession.
That is, both options lead to one outcome: grow girl, which is unable, does not want, can not even afraid of doing some independent actions. And she urgently need yourself to someone charging to this someone took care of all all the responsibility and all the decisions.
Some people are lucky and that person is. And she's married, and it turns out, as we like to say, "a stone wall". The man brings home the money, decides he wants to eat, she has to cook, where they go on vacation, when they will give birth to children. Such men grow from boys who grew up with my mother-a housewife and father-getter, that is for them in General but this familiar picture. About this marriage dreams almost each of our girls. And everything is good, nothing good usually of these families does not work.
First of all, some of the girls a man just never will meet.
Secondly, with the acquisition of life experience people tend to change, and the man may get bored with this system. I know the story, although the pair created exactly according to this Canon: it is everything, it adorns his life. At some point she called him and asked to put money on the phone because she doesn't know how to do it. Then she asked him to call in somewhere and learn something, I might as well do it myself. Then there was another series like these small requests, which the man in the end just boiled and left in the night.
Helplessness can be pricked in matters such as changing the wheels, but the total inability to somehow take care of themselves in the end, exasperated even people with angelic patience.The woman in this relationship plays the role of a child, and not all this game will be like years. In the end everyone wants to feel the family support and assistance, not just to see her pretty face and delicious food.
Thirdly, a man can disappear from your life, whether through divorce or sudden death.
I remember a case from my practice: came to me the former wife of a diplomat. All her life she lived in Paradise: the money, the houses, any problems she had. Even when they made a show specially trained people picked up her right dress, she greeted the guests, smiled at them, and at the end of the evening were escorted, taking the kissing hand. And at one point, the diplomat declared that he is divorced. And she's under 40. In marriage they lived for 20 years. And here she sat with me and cried, repeating the same question: "how now to live?". It is a day in the life was not working. Not a day wonder where the money comes from. All decided by her husband. Her head did not come that when-you'll have to look for a job and think there will be enough money to pay.
At what is often the lives of these girls teaches nothing and after parting with a man. I had 2 clients who received post-divorce car and property, but not a penny of money. So they continued to ride on the coolest cars and live in multimillion dollar mansions, but to eat up with friends. Sell, buy something simpler to reconsider their way of life — no, they do not know how. They had decided nothing.
In General, the worst thing that can happen to a woman is the situation in which she lived for many years without worries, and then suddenly found themselves alone. Now can she? Even if some time the girl worked, but at the first opportunity escaped "a stone wall" — the problem remains.
The fact is that between "work" and "sell themselves," often there is a huge difference.If a woman wants to leave her job so she does their job. So she is not in fact studied, it does not work there, she never gets no joy, she just toils. The people who work on his favorite work, where they realize their full potential, not a quitter, even if they have hundreds of millions of accounts.
Also interesting: Michael Labkovsky: after All, it all depends on the women
Michael Labkovsky: Worry because insignificant means to be neurotic
Of course, someone can coarsely be lucky, and all life will be here to stay, soul to soul, and die in one day. But should we expect that this will happen with you? published