Make friends with your fear: It's more important than you think

Fear gave me discomfort prevented to approach people and situations and forced to doubt everything that I did. Of course, I tried to get rid of it. I plugged his ears, but his voice began rokotat inside me.

When I tried to get away, he clung to me with his terrible claws. If I tried to drown him, he shouted louder and louder, until I finally gave up. The more I hated the fear, the more and louder it grew. But the solution was found!

The lion's share of my life, I lamented the fact that the fear never left me. Whatever I do, wherever you go and whoever met near always been an unwelcome companion, screeching in my ears and shouting any of the nearby.



So you're here

I often wondered why he made a nest is in me, how he was able to become so strong, and when he finally leaves me alone. Similar questions arise until many years later I realized that this fear was one of the main conditions for the survival of my ancestors. He appeared for a reason. Incidentally, it is thanks to him they survived and passed on their genes to those of us who now wanders the planet. Anyway, this discovery was for me a turning point.

I started to look at your own way. I saw in him a caring adult, a warning that you can not lose vigilance. I saw in him a benevolent friend, reminiscent of standing on my way dangers. I began to perceive him as a loving grandmother, remembers his own experience and want to pass it to me. Was it really the voice of the ancestors?

He creates you inside

The perception of fear in a new light has given me strength, and I began to deal with it. What I would say to all the people who have already shown a keen interest to me? Who cares about my safety and wanted to protect me from situations that could harm me?

I turned back to them and went to live in his own way, breaking the very relationships that have shaped me? Or have listened to everything, slowly losing their own interests? He would become submissive and would conduct a limited but secure life, renouncing any experience, even potentially contributing to my development?

Looking at life from the perspective of fear, I wanted to soothe his fears, without giving up their own dreams. I learned to accept the permanent presence of a number of cautionary companion. I learned to see his concern and to distinguish genuine from an exaggerated anxiety.

He gave me wisdom - I knew what to stay away - and the courage - and I was doing what I wanted, if the benefits outweigh the risks. Fear made me stronger in belief and gave me the opportunity to stand up for what I believed in, regardless of other people's voices.

Sometimes it was not easy. Fear is constantly accompanied me, and, even without being able to stop me, he continued with a smile, watching from the sidelines. But it was not always. Most often he bit his lip and shook his head silently, combining mother, grandmother and friend. But he knew that I had listened to, and because I have never ignored him, he cried much less. In the end, he just wanted to protect me. He did not realize that I grew up.

But even as an adult, I am grateful to my fear. Without him I would be reckless, misguided, unprepared. Without him I would not consider the situation from different angles, and I did not manage to come up with innovative ways to perform tasks. Without it, I could have failed to realize their true potential.

It expands your horizons

Fear has given me an incredible ability. This is the only power, fueled by imagination and ignites creativity. Yes, he deploys the most unpleasant scenario. But it also allows me to write with passion, drawing, going beyond reality and dream on the verge of a possible.

History is full of examples of well-known artists and intellectuals, tormented by their own fears, but still continued to strive for greatness. Isaac Newton, Ernest Hemingway, Vincent Van Gogh, Michelangelo left their mark on civilization, because they encouraged their fears and use their energy for the benefit of their hobbies. Were the Greeks are right in saying that the work - a gift from the gods

? Worth another article on the topic - About the fear of rejection ...

So, I made friends with her fear. I do not speak to him for advice and consultation. But his presence makes me smile, and I am always ready to give him their "free ears." Sometimes he whispers, and sometimes breaks down to cry. But he knows that I will listen to him. And he believes that I will act as I need. His eyes because of my shoulder starts to like me. Sometimes I'm afraid that he will leave me, finishing the work. But as a mother, guiding children to the end of his days, the fear refuses to leave me.

Perhaps he, too, finds solace in my company.

Translation Author: Vyacheslav Davidenko