Brain and Happiness: How to change your feelings and behavior

I'm more than I thought,
I'm better than I thought,
I never knew how good I am.
"Great road song" Walt Whitman.

Our psyche contains our experience as well as our body is constructed mainly from the food we eat. The flow of events gradually forms our brain and, consequently, the mental characteristics. Something you can remember clearly: "This I did last summer. So I felt when I was in love. ยป

But the majority occurring in our brain connections never comes to mind. This is called involuntary memory. It occurred to us is stored events, model of relations with the people, the emotional tendency, the overall view of the world.

Involuntary memory creates a common background of our soul (how do you feel being the fact that you have), based on the accumulated traces occurring events with us.

These traces can in some sense be divided into two categories: what is the benefit to you and to others, and what is harmful. As stated in the section Wisdom Eightfold Righteous Path of Buddhism, we need to create in memory to store and multiply useful involuntary nicks and flawed prevent and reduce.

Sensing the benefit


However, there is one problem. Our brain is primarily reacts to unpleasant factors - monitors, records, stores, recalls most of them. We have already said that it absorbs bad like a sponge, and with very good careful. So even if the positive impressions more than the negative, the negative involuntary memory replenished quickly. And our general mental background - how we feel, being who we are - can be gloomy and pessimistic

. Of course, a negative experience is also useful: the loss of open heart, remorse provide a moral compass, alertness helps to avoid dangers, anger flashes an evil that needs to be fixed. But do you really think that you are missing a negative experience? Emotional pain, unprofitable neither you nor those around you, there is needless suffering. And the pain today tomorrow creates even more pain. For example, even a single episode, plunged you into a state of depression, it is able to rebuild neural connections in your brain, and in the future such episodes will become more likely.

POSITIVE digested

Here are three important steps.

positive evidence should be turned into a positive experience. Something good is constantly going around, but we mostly do not notice it. Someone you smiled, you saw a something of value; flowers bloom; you've finished the hard work - and it usually does not leave us a deep impression. This is not good.

It is necessary to notice, to capture all the positive, especially in everyday life: the children's faces, the smell of orange, clouds in the sky, ideally a vacation, small pleasant work and so on. What would be a pleasant fact that you do not encounter, recognize it, open it, let him touch you. If you come to a banquet, do not look at delicious food - eat them

. Savor every positive fact. It is wonderful! Hold 5, 10, or even 20 seconds. Do not allow yourself to turn your attention to something else. The longer you keep it the benefit in my mind, the more experience it, the more neurons emit together and give impetus and clearer the trail of this positive experience in your memory.

Mark your positive emotions and physical sensations - is the foundation of involuntary memory. Let them fill your whole body and will be most acute. For example, if someone made you something good, let your whole chest filled with warmth.

Notice the nice aspects of the event. Experience, for example, as well, when you gently hugging someone you love. So you stimulate the release of dopamine, and it will help you on what you enjoy, and strengthen neural association of involuntary memory. You do this not in order to cling to pleasure (which sooner or later would cause you to suffer), but to take it a joy to wear and inside, and do not look for it in the outside world.

In addition, you can even enhance the pleasant sensation, it deliberately embellishing. For example, if you get the pleasure of communicating with someone, you can call in and memories of other feelings experienced due to the fact that someone loves you. So you will help release oxytocin, "attachment hormone", and deepen the joy of communication. Or you can increase the sense of satisfaction from the work done by you, remembering the difficulties you had to overcome.

Imagine or feel that pleasant event penetrates deep into your body and soul, like the sun's heat in the skin, the water in the sponge or placed in a jewel box - in your heart. Relax your entire body and absorbs the emotions, feelings and thoughts about their experiences.

Sensing the benefit


Positive experience can be used to calm down, to contrast his experience negative and even replace the experience of the first second. If we think of two things at the same time, a connection is established between them. In part, that's why we are talking about your troubles with those who are good to us concerns, we feel relieved pain and memories are mixed with a sense of calm, and the approval of heat, which gives us our interlocutor.

VYRAVAEM weeds and plant flowers

In order to gradually replace the negative unconscious memories positive highlight, highlights the positive aspects of your consciousness to experience the event and at the same time you try to push the negative stuff on the back burner.

Negative thinking material that you work with, can be acquired in adulthood, including the present. However, it is often more important to turn to voluntary and involuntary memories of childhood: they are those roots that nourish our experience frustrating

. Sometimes people get angry with himself for what some moments of their past afflict them in the present. But remember: the brain is designed so that it changes under the influence of growing experience, especially negative. We learn from experience, especially the experience of childhood, and it is quite natural to live with what we have learned.

As a teenager I often dug dandelions in our garden, but if I could not pull out of the ground all their roots, they grow again. Chagrin behave. Therefore, palpate their youngest years, the most defenseless, the richest emotions layers of his inner world and try to find the roots of its troubles and suffering. A little practice and self-examination will help you make a list of the underlying sources of today's experiences.

Let become commonplace to view it for you when you are angry, offended or alarmed, "do not feel at ease." Among these deep sources may be feelings of uselessness (you were not popular in school) or impotence (you suffer from chronic illness), mistrust of intimate relationships (the result of a failed partnership). When you get to the roots, open themselves to the positive that will help you get rid of the negative power over you. Digging up weeds in your brain garden and plant flowers in their place.

unpleasant consequences often cured by something positive, which is the opposite of them. For example, replace the children's sense of their own sense of weakness your strength today. If you yearning pursue attacks because of a failed connection, remember that there is someone who loves you, will feel this love and take it into yourself.

Use the power of words. Tell yourself for example: "I have overcome all this, and here I am, and many like me." You will not forget the old facts, but their emotional pressure will gradually subside.

The point is not to resist the negative impressions or chase the positive - it would be reduced to lust, and it is, as we know, leads to suffering. The point is to find a state of balance when you pay attention, open, will curiously look at the challenges going forward with the thoughts and feelings that can help you.

In other words, introduce positive aspects into negative two ways:

Today happened to you something good. Give this event to get into the old bitterness.
When something comes up negative, fill your mind with positive emotions and patterns that can serve as an antidote.
Use any of these methods, try to remember and feel similar positive developments still at least 2 times in the next few hours. There is evidence that the bad memories, as arbitrary and involuntary, is particularly susceptible to change soon after their next play.

If you are confident enough, do something else. Go to a small risk and do something that the mind sees fit, and your anxiety causes you to fear and avoid it. For example, show your true feelings or just ask someone about love or seek promotion. If the result is good, and, apparently, so be it, feel it, and slowly but surely remove old fears.

In most cases, the assimilation of something good does not take more than a minute, often - a few seconds. This is your personal. No one must know what you are doing. But over time, you will actually be able to create new positive patterns in your brain.

WHY are well accepted SAKE

Since the brain has a "negative slope" - the absorption of a positive experience, ability to resist negative, requires effort. Bowing to the positive, you actually eliminate neurotic imbalance. Today, you give yourself the care and support that should be given in childhood, but may not be received in full.

Focusing on what is good, and the adoption of a good natural way on a daily basis increases the flow of positive emotions in your brain. Emotions have a global impact by organizing the brain as a whole. In other words, positive feelings bring great benefit.

They are, among other things, strengthen the immune and cardiovascular systems, which are beginning to respond less to stress and weaken the impact of unpleasant events, including trauma. It turns positive cycle: positive feelings today increase the likelihood of good feeling tomorrow.

The same applies to children. In particular, the perception of the benefits very positive effect on the children, whether they are naturally cheerful or gloomy. Cheerful children usually too quickly switch to something new before the brain has time to consolidate their positive feelings experienced. A gloomy children, as we know, tend to ignore or downplay the good. (And there are more children who are the funny, the darkest).

But no matter what the child's temperament, if the child is a part of your life, try it a little bit to relax in the evening (or at any other time, for example one minute before the bell school bell) and remember that it was good that today turned out to think about what makes him happy (favorite critter, affectionate parents, scored a goal in a football field). And let him try to immerse themselves in these positive feelings.

In terms of the perception of the benefits of spiritual practice strengthens the primary states of mind such as kindness and inner peace, so that a person acquires the ability again and again to achieve these conditions.

It is rewarding and helps to follow the path of awakening (which sometimes seems to rise to the mountain), gives belief and faith, showing you the results of your efforts. Through the cultivation of positive and good feelings you cultivate kindness. And when your own heart is full, you can give more to others.

Sensing a good - not to smile at everything and everyone, or to avoid difficulties in life. It means to strive for inner well-being, peace, peace - safe havens, where you can come and always go back again and again.

Random memories - it's a conscious recovery in the memory of certain events. However, the memory is stored and involuntary impression - traces of past events, which are almost never realized, but have on the formation of the inner landscape of our brain and spirit of our psyche.

Unfortunately, the brain has a tendency to focus on the negative experiences involuntary, even if in general events were positive.

The main medicine - consciously select and interpret positive experience

. There are three simple steps: we must try to turn any positive development in a positive experience, to feel this good experience, take it yourself (immerse it)

. When events are imprinted in the memory, they capture with them what is currently in our field of consciousness, especially if it's something important. This mechanism can be used to implement a positive material in the negative material. This is an important medicine.

Just put a positive experience at the forefront of your mind and neutralize the negative. Use the method called in two ways. If you happened something good, take all the positive in yourself, savor with the help of old pain. If pop up negative memories, encourage positive feelings and perspectives, they will become the antidote.

Think about how deep the roots of today's sorrows. They usually go away in childhood. Different alarms may have different roots. Consciously send their roots to these positive experiences to completely pull out the old pain "from the ground" and prevent it from growing again.

Each time, taking a something good, you strengthen this or that positive neutron pattern in their brain. If you do this several times a day for a month, you will gradually greatly change your mind, feelings and behavior.

from the book "BRAIN AND HAPPINESS. Mysteries of modern neuropsychology. " Authors Rick Hanson and Richard Mandius.


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