9 horrors through which pass a woman whose man going through a midlife crisis

Every man goes through hell once called midlife crisis. More precisely, it is he believes that passes through hell. In fact, in the underworld travel is not a man, and that unfortunate, that at this moment is near. As long as the spouse is fully wringing his hands, half of it is forced to be smart, patient and understanding as the wife of his father Fyodor or Countess, for example.




frame from the film "Seksogolik" 2009
In fact, of course, to be the wife of Theodore's father or not - you decide. But to what men call a crisis, it is better to prepare in advance.

Sadness
Crisis husband will be sad and whining. From morning till night. On any occasion idiotic. He will complain, because Monday, Thursday, autumn, in the house ran out of coffee, the coffee is, but not the sort of global financial crisis, life is a failure, etc.. In this atmosphere, dribbling whining you will need to stay friendly and active. However, your kindness, too, it will disappoint. Because he - all abandoned single tuberose, and here you all so light goodwill, wretch

. Unjustified anger
When my husband will not be sad, he will be angry. And, as a consequence, domatyvatsya to all and, above all, to you. Even if you know how to cook soup, "like a mother", to play Schubert on the bagpipes and dance Kamarinsky - it would enrage him. "Do not say that, do not look, do not behaving themselves." At such moments, you will really want to suspend it for the bells to the chandelier, but this desire you, unfortunately, not realizuesh. First, he's heavy. And, secondly, it is crisis!

Paranoia
Crisis husband turn into a hellish paranoid. It will seriously believe that everything that happens in the world is done in order to "bring it to the handle / Durkee / grave." It would be tolerable, limit poor fellow conspiracy theory zhidomasonskogo, but once he seriously accuse wife's mother that she purposely overdo burgers. "Why her?" - Pointeresueshsya and you'll be able to answer - "Yes dokanat to me." And he will check the receipts from the supermarket, secretly read your mail and absolutely know that someone (tёscha course, who else?) Persuaded cat piss in his slippers.

resentment
Over time he begins to remember and spend too much time all of the real and imaginary "grievances". It turns out that over the years your accumulated resentments of coexistence as hell. This is where you open and the depth of man's subconscious. Are you surprised to learn that ten years ago, threw out his most favorite T-shirt. You find out that he was all the years of your marriage waiting, when will you guess congratulate him on the Day of Marine. And the most important thing - in 2008 you ate cherry yogurt, and he wanted it! And God forbid you say "yogurt was excellent».

Rotten movie
He begins to hear strange music and watching weird movies. Prepare for the fact that all the time, free from domatyvany, whims and whining, he'll stick to something heavy, mournful and suicidal. Under these "grave chants" you will wake up and fall asleep. Instead of family comedies and detectives you a hundred times revise dreary "boys'" documentary about submarines, airships, fortification, and the dead baleen generals.

sociopath
Escaping with the crisis her husband on the street or on a visit, do not wait for the conversion of shit in ledenechik. Scandals with its neighbors, a showdown with wipers, assaults on waiters and sellers, as well as regular skirmishes with the neighboring car drivers become commonplace. Pofigizmom better armed and pepper spray. Because 99% of the 100 will be such that the driver of the neighboring car, too, is going through a midlife crisis.

Active
stage At some point, he said that "it is necessary that a global change." Of course, it starts with you, but at this point you have already learned how to beat off his attack and simply you will send it to the known address. And then everything that came before it, including the divisional application, which is submitted to you neighbors seem flowers. Because active crisis much more dangerous than passive husband. At best, he will lead his fee and a young mistress, and at worst would start to spend your long-term savings for extreme tourism and gambling. And he begins to wander through informal get-togethers, buy a new t-shirt with Che, bike or helicopter. Hate it or not - you decide

. The culmination
In the end, inevitably will suffer! And he will certainly do something irreparable. It stated, for example, that all his life is not so, but in fact it is - a brilliant stockbroker, a web designer, or, even worse, the writer. Under this confused delirium he will throw the normal work and plunge myself into the abyss of ruthless freelancers, and you (and children) in the full financial ass. Talk him out of this is not possible, appeal to reason is meaningless. This catastrophe can only wait, unless Lavra Sophia Andreyevna all seduce you more.

Finale
Crisis husband can go. Indeed it can. But if he is to this well-tried all the above steps, then most likely, you'll think, "croaked Maxim, and to hell with him." And going right.