Our life depends on many different factors, many of which we can not change. For example, karma - as a kind of collection of the past "achievements" that we have to work with. But there is something that is subject only to ourselves, and what determines our tomorrow.
It is said that being determines consciousness. This is true. From where and how we live, our system of values is formed, our mood. It formed itself naturally.
Yet in the life of a reasonable person saying this works the other way - the consciousness determines being. That is the way we live depends on what you have in mind.
Human consciousness - or cesspool, or flower beds. Some see only bad all the difficulties, differences and contradictions, dirt. Others see a good, happy and good.
In fact, in this world there is something, and more. In excess. Approximately fifty-fifty. Any person can find a lot of good or a lot of bad smelling. In every religion there are holy men and purity, and there are those who dishonor her. In any country, there are strengths and there - cons.
The only question is on what we focus. Because this is our life and will.
When I place in my Instagram posts about India (and I love this country, and every year I spend there a couple of months), the reaction is different. On the same picture one can see the simplicity and lightness, the other - the poverty and wretchedness, some see the purity, the other - the dirt. And everything seems to be right, because in India you can find it all at once.
But on the other hand it is worth considering, if I can only see it, what is going on in my head? What I focus? On the shortcomings and problems, ugliness? Or I can see around the beauty and purity? And this is not only about India, India - just an example.
If we are not able to see the good and focus on it, the whole life we have is joyless. We're in the husband merits not see, thanks to fail, and the children will see the flaws and to deal with them, and even himself - instead of "good morning, sunshine!" In front of the mirror, we probably thought, "Well, hello, old toad! ».
Sometimes women who have everything, can not be happy, because in the minds - cesspool. And everything seems to be there - my husband does not drink and does not change, but his socks spreads. Not noticing anything good in her husband, because some socks ready to divorce his wife.
Kids - you can enjoy millions of women dream about it day and night. But if you only see the sleepless nights and whims, ignoring the smiles and new skills the baby, that motherhood will not bring any joy. Absolutely.
Habits are stronger than us.
We're always all appreciate. We saw a man - and immediately hung some shortcut. What? It depends on what we are focused on what we have in mind. For some, the person will be worthy of respect, and for someone - on the contrary, the object of aversion.
The same will present different women in different ways. Someone and a small souvenir - it is primarily a manifestation of love, and someone a diamond is too small.
We (especially women) are mostly set up to search for flaws.
We always see around the flaws, we know that and how to improve. We sincerely believe that it is right - because you can not just talk about the good, only good things to notice! This is not a real picture! You can not be in the pink glasses!
We have been taught as a child that is not conceited, sure the focus is on the shortcomings. And ordinary life is set up so that as long as you behave well, to you do not pay attention, do not praise, not rewarded.
But should you be guilty - and a whole bunch of consequences - fines problems, notation, the courts, the investigation. Errors notice immediately, but the good things pass.
We can not do compliments - and accept them from others. But we are very good at criticizing, laugh at others, use sarcasm, humiliated and poke flaws. We have just given it - it's so striking!
I remember two of my friends after they met a young man tried to convince each other wrong. One shouted that he had a hole on his toes, and then he slob. Others told about what he helpful and caring.
The first thought him unworthy of a candidate for communication, and the second - a promising partner. The man is the same. They communicate together in a common company. And the conclusions are different. And yes, the first is still not married, looking for the ideal in all respects, and the second - happily married.
Yes, her husband of stars from the sky is not enough, but it takes care of the family and children with his wife loves.
Every time I write articles about travel, I only write about the good. Because a lot of good everywhere. Different good.
And every time some people write, they say that in the idealization, and you know it but in India the dirt, poverty and wretchedness, Muslim wives are beaten to death, baliyki work for pennies and can not get a divorce, Europeans ugly in the States all thick ...
And so on and so forth.
Although often happens that these people often have never been either in India or in Muslim countries, make their conclusions on some news headlines and stories, "a distant acquaintance." I did not see anything with my own eyes, did not live the experience of your heart, but opinion is they have very solid. Negative.
I do not idealize any country in the world. I know that everywhere there are disadvantages, in many traditional cultures have kinks. As in our lack of culture and western feminism.
But I prefer to see all the good that other places do not. What can be learned - again things have anywhere in the world.
What can enrich my inner world.
What can help me become happier. So I prefer to talk about the good. And in general, and with their readers. Because I want to be happy - and that you were happy.
Midden - infectious. Midden sometimes much more attractive. Any reality show where people fall lower and lower, have become incredibly popular.
The TV has channels where round the clock scandals, murder-investigation-nightmares-mud. And people are watching all this, infected, they spoil your mind all this muck, and then can not stop - and also begin to carry it to the outside world. But why?
Stop, look, what's going on inside you. Do you really want to live this way, in all of this?
Our consciousness determines our existence. If consciousness is a dump, and the life of a dump. If consciousness - bed (even in a very hard external data, but still - a flower bed), then life will be like a flower bed.
The only question is, what we focus on and what is going to - in my head, in my heart. What we used to see, than to dwell on and which place more importance.
Having in mind the trash - it is easy.
To do this, nothing to do with me, blame will be all around the world is unfair and awful. After all, consider men goats is easier than learning to understand and accept them. Easier to live alone than to adapt to the husband, his parents, while trying not to lose himself.
And instead of balancing like a tightrope walker, many women deliberately choose loneliness. Simply hated office work than to find myself and realized - there is terrible, risky, and even peck.
Simply believe that children - spinogryzov from each of their caprice face twist and writhe sufferer. Or do not give birth, and disgust to look at them. Well there is a simple truth! Simply believing that everything will srastetsya than learn to perform their duties and to love.
Simply to live like everyone else, you go your own way, which is yet to be found. Simply gather around the garbage and pass them around. There are no super efforts. True, no happiness, and fragrances so-so.
But to grow flowers - it is necessary to try. Learning to give thanks, to celebrate the good. Even her husband, who spreads the socks, you can find a million good qualities, some of them still in its infancy, and without the power and support can be lost.
Even in-law, who does not love you, you can find good. For example, she gave birth to and raised your beloved husband. In any of the difficult situation there is always something for which you can thank God. At least for the fact that you are alive, you have a family, have a place to live and there.
That's what I call it - "create their own flower bed" in mind. It is more difficult, but in the future more pleasant and joyful. Want to try?