Seven psychological errors that can ruin a relationship

Myth 1: Good relationships require effort h2> «The strongest relationship - the result of hard work", - says Doctor of Psychology and a practicing psychologist from Los Angeles Lisa Bloom. She believes that the modern style of child-rearing is not ready for that good relationships require effort. "Relationships are like a garden: the more effort, more beautiful, - says Lisa Bloom - But there is another problem - every effort must be mutual».

One sign of "weak" relationships is dissatisfaction with a partner: she / he feels that only she / he works hard on relationships and brings them to sacrifice the most valuable. It is also the hallmark of the relationship is the fact that one partner spends too much time on their maintenance and less enjoy them.

Myth 2: If partners love each other, they know the needs and feelings of each other h2> «It is foolish to expect that your partner will be able to read your thoughts - wrote in his book, Miss Orbach. - Those expectations led to quarrels and disappointments. The best measure of understanding between couples is their care for each other. If the partner listens intently to you, and you, in turn, expressed himself clearly enough, then everything falls into place. Otherwise, the game of "cat and mouse" ends grievances and groundless quarrels ».

Myth 3: If you really love, passion disappears h2> Over time, the passion fades at all, no matter what feelings you're blazing right now. It's a shame, but that's it.

The most common reason for this is considered life. The farther away, the more we load the household chores, responsibilities, way of life, a passion which melts like smoke. But this does not mean that it disappears forever. With the help of an ordinary romance, which do not always have the time, it can be returned to their former relationship passion. In addition, good help to overcome this kind of "divide" the joint interests.

Myth 4: Birth of a child will strengthen your marriage h2> «Studies have shown that a feeling of happiness, unfortunately, decreases with each child - says Terri Orbach - This does not mean that you will love each other less, or You will not love children. The more children in a family, the more difficult it relations ».

Mistake to assume that a child will improve existing relationships. On the contrary, the emergence of the baby greatly complicate your life: cares and new responsibilities that fall on the shoulders of adult family members. Thus, problems are often not solved, only aggravated and deepened.

Myth 5: Jealousy - a sign of true love h2> Jealousy may indicate a lack of confidence in yourself and the person in a partner, and may be unpleasant and unbeatable feature of his personality.

Among jealous men and women have, but their reaction to this absorbing feeling completely opposite. For men, the jealousy - a reason to throw out the emotions, anger, and for women - an occasion to reflect on the relationship and the work on them. As a result of this difference, women are often at the mercy of misconceptions that male jealousy indicates a special love. It is not, and you have to see this, if you do not begin to work on yourself and find the true, deeper causes bouts of jealousy.

Myth 6: Quarrels destroy relationships h2> «In fact, an argument can not kill a really close relationship, - says Miss Bloom - They may be a manifestation of healthy competition between the partners. Also contribute to conflicts "lapping" the partners to each other and to develop a special relationship, in which each will bypass the problematic themes and spare the feelings of loved ones.

If you come to a quarrel with the position of "I can do that conflict does not happen again" - your relationship is safe.

Myth 7: Partner must change h2> It's simple - your partner will not change. At least, you can not change his own will. But you can try to get him to work on yourself - if you can convey to him the need for change.

And do it better not using scandals and ultimatums, but through frank discussions about what you do not like. If you are able to convey to the partner how much you prevents to live his behavior, it is possible that he will go to meet you and will try to iron out the problem.

Website wants your relationship long and happy life!



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