Psychologists and relationship expert on how to make your relationship perfect
For many of us take the basic relationship in life. When things are going well in them, these relationships are a source of constant joy. But when it is not so - the relationship can bring us real pain. But in fact, our happiness depends on how we behave in relationships and how to treat themselves.
Perhaps lately we behaved improperly. There may have been too rigid and too bent his line. In any case, never too late to focus their efforts on trying to make your relationship the best in your life.
To make your relationship ideal, please adopt the following tips:
1. Look at your relationship with fresh eyes
In fact, not all the romance they are worth the effort. Let's start with the fact that an objective look at your current relationship. Does not the partner itself towards you offensive or derogatory? Not too if he is jealous? Whether you are co-dependent? Can you be yourself alone with a partner? Both of you tap the best in each other?
After thinking about these questions, decide whether you want to stay in this relationship. Sometimes the best thing you can do for your personal life - is to go to where, say, "the grass is greener." This can mean that you want some time to be alone, and what you're looking for someone who will love you the way you deserve.
2. Start with your own happiness
Most people are greatly mistaken in believing that, having met him or her, they will be happy sharply. But in fact, studies show that the happiest people are trying to get satisfaction not only by romantic feelings, but also on their regular habits. So try to do what you like, whether it's a favorite hobby, keeping yourself in shape or meeting with friends. If you behave naturally - it will allow you to bring in the best of relationships.
3. Commit exciting actions with your partner
"I get used to everything." The famous phrase is the best describes the essence of human nature. (That is why the dinner and a movie with a partner on a first date so exciting, and in the third year of family life boring). However, there is hope!
Research has shown that couples involved in some "exciting" activities, reported more marital satisfaction than those that shared a "pleasant experience". In addition, new activities stepping up in your brain area responsible for the release of hormones of joy. Thus, in order to revive the relationship, they add something new!
4. Learn the language of love your partner
Instead of the golden rule I like Platinum rule - "Do unto others as they would like you to be done." And following Dr. Gary Chapman (especially his book "The Five Love Languages"), you and your partner may prefer different ways to receive love.
So decide what your partner prefers - the physical touch, time, care, gifts or words of encouragement - and often try to show the love of his favorite way. And do not forget to tell your loved one language of love that he repay you the same!
5. Avoid the "four horsemen of the apocalypse»
Who are they? Relationship expert Dr. John Gottman identified four types of behavior, the most damaging for the relationship: criticism, contempt, defensive opposition. If you want to improve your relationship - discard these destructive behaviors and find constructive ways to communicate.
6. The practice of mindfulness
Mindfulness or deliberate fixation on the present time linked with great satisfaction from the relationship, as it allows you to enjoy the positive aspects and to be more attentive to the partner. The study also shows that people care practitioners have less emotional stress during the romantic conflict and have been established better communication in general.
So, if you are not engaged in the practice of mindfulness - start this year. This has a positive impact on your relationships (and many other areas of your life)
7. Make the most of the good news
Research shows that the way we react to the good news of our partner, can either help our intimacy, or harm her. Decide to take an active interest and support when the partner is proud to share with you my success. It will deepen your relationship and bring you both a lot of happiness.
8. Touch your partner every day
From the moment we were born, we deal with all the time. Touching is associated with a sense of security, trust and support. People receiving more physical response from the partner relations are very positive. So decide to kiss, hug a loved one and pressed to his heart every day!