Fresh Jokes

If the first attempt does not work, then skydiving is not for you ...

 - As a blonde laugh on Monday morning?
 - Tell her anecdote on Friday night!

In Russia, were issued new condoms with win-win titles:
"Went to dick" and "Went to pussy"!

You're so stupid, well, so stupid!
You know, when a person is bitten by a vampire - he becomes a vampire, and you apparently bitten (or gored) sheep!

Putin sits in his office and meditates. Zaxodit Chubais:
 - Vladimir Vladimirovich ...
 - Get away Tolia, I lost energy from you ...

In business, everything should be fine: villa in the Canary Islands and a card table in Monte Carlo, 600 th "Merce" yacht and catamaran from the French Riviera, shot in the head and a monument at Novodevichy.

The inscription on the bottle, "Drink" Pinocchio ", is made of natural wood extracts.

Two beer or not two beer?

The FSB recruit workers.
After predvaritelnogo sobesedovaniya, we handed over the envelope with the stamp "Sovershenno Secret!" And attributed to takoy poprosili-verily office. One oddball went on his way to the toilet and opened the envelope.
It says:
"You come to us! Return Return! & Quot;