Why modern women choose their happiness and no longer want to listen to men

"I feel lonely in a relationship": saddened ladies of our time. At the same time, they continue to live with the wrong person in agony and disappointment. If only I wasn't alone. However, more and more women approach the issue from the other side. They fearlessly enter solitude and discover the stunning facets of their loved ones! And their experience is really encouraging.



The other day, my friend Inga and I are sitting in the kitchen celebrating her divorce. The day after tomorrow we go to a retreat in the Carpathians. Rolling her eyes with pleasure, Inga anticipates yoga in the bosom of magical mountain nature, meditation, spa, bathing in vats.

And I admire her spiritualized face, rejuvenated by ten years. Just 2 months ago, her trembling voice in a pipe asked for an overnight stay after a nightmarish argument with her husband. And in the morning, we would find the right combination of consilire and couchon to hide the red spot on the cheekbone.



Now this golden-haired fairy with shiny green eyes laughs as if she were 20 again. Like in college, when we failed the colloquium on the tower, but the disco took away all our sorrows. He raises a glass of champagne and gives a toast: “To the end of man-worshipping!”

You know, Svetik, I am so glad that the girls of our generation finally stop believing in fairy tales. We grew up in the movie “Moscow does not believe in tears”, where a beautiful, successful factory boss runs after a drinking misunderstanding and tries to return him to his apartment – on his own terms! And "Office Romance"? That's terrible! Clever Kalugin picked up a vile irresponsible manipulator who humiliated her, shaken her soul, so as not to be alone.



“Yeah,” I say, “Do you remember Dubtsov?” “I will go up into the sky, I will fall into the abyss.” Sorry, pride!

"Exactly!" the friend continues. “God bless the age of self-enlightenment. We finally waited until women, especially very young girls, stopped pleasing men. And believe that without them they are incomplete.”

Patriarchate: Where is the place of women? With my eyes closed, I'm diving into my 1990s. In my purely patriarchal family (though without a father), my grandfather led the ball. And the grandmother, the kingdom of heaven to her, demonstratively listened to him. She taught me. Like, I will not learn to cook soup, to wash and lick the floors to a state of sterility, no one will marry me.



Even then, a question was firmly in my child's head. Here's your grandfather. He's lying on the couch all day long, yelling at home, giving out commands. Grandma drags trays with lunches and dinners to him, washes, laundries. Is that how I'm gonna get married? Where is happiness for me personally?

When I was 7, I asked my mom and grandma why they gave money to my 30-year-old uncle, Vita (grandmother’s son and brother). He's an adult now. And they just shyly hid their eyes: "Well, he's a man, he needs it." My compassionate cousins protected my uncle when I caught him cheating on my wife. This aunt came to my mother, and that half-naked and from the room of the uncle ran out, it’s not yours, Sveta, it’s up, go look at cartoons!



The question of survival: Why did women hold on to their pants so hard in the 1990s and tolerate unworthy treatment? Some would say it was easier to survive. But my grandfather was sleeping, and my grandmother ploughed hard at three jobs. And the story is common.

Many women are now able to feed themselves. Therefore, the bar of requirements for a partner skyrocketed. Well, there's a lot to see. Respect your partner and respect yourself – how unbearable is this request?



Here's my Inga waking up once. Not without the help of a therapist, to whom she went to lick the wounds of depression. She looked at herself from the outside - a fading sad shadow, whose world narrowed to four walls with the center in the eternally dissatisfied man. “If I feel lonely in a relationship, if I’m not valued, why do I need it?” I once dreamed of opening a French cafe.

And now this girl with her delicate hands knocks her way out of the dark centuries-old realm of female submission. And not just her!



Critical thinking helps our women challenge grandmother’s covenants. You will no longer be intimidated by the phrase, “You will be alone.” Marilyn Monroe once said, “A man should be good, I can live badly myself.” And this girl has snorted in a life of male coldness.

Raising standards in relationships is great! But it's more important not to fix what's not right for you. And don’t try to meet someone’s requirements in order to be liked. You can't laugh at offensive jokes about blondes unless you're funny. Do not tolerate accusations of being squeezed if you do not want to flirt. Stop trying to make a person out of someone who doesn’t want to change for you. He doesn't want to, that's it!



One life. Living it in someone else’s skin and not getting out of the dollop of other people’s expectations is scary. Let us not be afraid to live!