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Is it true that modern women should not have girlfriends?
Not long ago, the waves of the Internet brought me to an interesting but outrageous article. A certain woman with 200,000 subscribers shared her opinion on what a true friend is . Or rather, that such people simply do not exist in nature. Moreover, she claims that an adult woman does not need friends, and especially girlfriends.
But this attitude did not surprise me as much as the comments under this article. Of course, according to the laws of the Internet, readers were divided into two camps. And I was simply amazed by how many people agreed with the author’s opinion. Undoubtedly, there are arguments for and against communicating with friends , and I will present them below. Let's figure out who friends are, whether they are needed or not.
Who is a true friend
Unsplash The author bases his opinion on the work of journalist Daria Aslamova, “The Adventures of a Mean Girl.” By the way, the work itself is very dubious and does not withstand harsh artistic criticism, but everyone knows the name. You can guess that the book is about the life of a very, very independent female person, whose main advantages can definitely be called courage and healthy selfishness.
Issues of friendship and relationships are also touched upon, and the writer herself spoke about this topic as follows:
“If you don’t want to become someone’s appendage, you need to resort to a cruel and even painful method. I threw away my friends like worn-out shoes as soon as I began to feel that I was losing my will under the influence of their interests.”
Unsplash Daria Aslamova has approximately the same opinion about men: you need to leave before the relationship turns into a tangle of misunderstandings and squabbles. And in general, the writer is accustomed, as she puts it, to taking the best from a person and leaving on time. And there is a certain philosophy in this, but what then to do with friends? Are they really not needed or are they only needed for a short period of time?
Does female friendship exist? Relationships between women are not at all like the partnership of men, especially in adulthood, and finding decent company is also not easy. However, this applies to all genders and ages - good friends do not lie on the road. And if you choose anyone in your circle, you can become the heroine of one of the following stories.
Unsplash Left with nothing. This is a story about how some friends are not averse to taking away someone’s place in life as soon as the opportunity arises. There are often situations when it is a friend who takes away her husband or young man. Women's jealousy is explained by high competition - the spirit of rivalry in relationships between women has not been canceled.
Abel and Cain: female adaptation. It’s about the fact that envy is one of the worst human vices. In friendship it manifests itself as follows: everything is fine as long as friends are on the same level. But as soon as someone becomes more successful, more athletic, or more loved, the friend immediately turns out to be his worst enemy and tries to return everything to its place. And the girlfriend will also sing about the fact that she is trying for the common good . She will give bad advice and secretly hate, just to somehow lower her friend’s suddenly raised bar. Just like in kindergarten.
Unsplash Office Game of Thrones. In work groups, there could be enough gossip and passion for hundreds of exciting novels, if someone were to write them. And sometimes female friendship turns into real parasitism. After all, it’s very convenient to find a simpler girlfriend and load her with additional work. And the more naive the person, the more diligently she tries to help. Unfortunately, such relationships rarely end in something good - you’ll be lucky if they say thank you. And it often happens that instead of a thank you, a friend-assistant receives another portion of gossip behind her back.
But all these situations could happen to anyone. It's easy enough to choose the wrong person . It seems to me that the writer Daria Aslamova, like many other adherents of her opinion, became a victim of human ingratitude. That’s why I lost faith in the power of friendship and bright motives. After all, if you analyze female friendship from a psychological point of view, it turns out that this is simply an irreplaceable thing.
Unsplash What psychologists think about female friendship Man is a social creature, and only a few of us are truly capable of leading an absolutely introverted lifestyle. It is especially important to maintain social connections for women. Because, according to statistics and centuries of evolutionary selection, it is women who maintain social connections between groups the most.
As a girl, friendship is simply irreplaceable. This is a joint knowledge of the world, and light rivalry, and an elbow on which you can lean. But in adulthood, female friendship becomes an integral component for leading a healthy lifestyle.
Unsplash When building our own family, we often begin to delve deeper into our partner. And it begins to seem that we no longer need anyone else. This is where the imbalance occurs.
The fact is that a beloved husband will not always satisfy the need for female communication . Children cannot do this either. For a woman to feel self-sufficient and maintain internal energy, she needs communication with other women. Maybe not best friends, but at least acquaintances or colleagues. A cup of coffee on the weekend, a walk in the park, or visiting a friend for a long heart-to-heart conversation has an amazing therapeutic effect. Besides, who can understand a woman better than another woman?
Please note that representatives of the fair sex, who become withdrawn over the years and devote themselves entirely to home, family and work, as a rule, look very tired. The likelihood of developing depression increases many times over. Libido and interest in the outside world decrease, chronic diseases worsen. Healthy communication is the key to a happy lifestyle.
Unsplash This does not mean that for the sake of your friends you need to give up everything in the world and put them first. But having a circle of close and faithful people with whom you can exchange experiences and emotions is extremely important for any person, not just a woman. Agree?
But this attitude did not surprise me as much as the comments under this article. Of course, according to the laws of the Internet, readers were divided into two camps. And I was simply amazed by how many people agreed with the author’s opinion. Undoubtedly, there are arguments for and against communicating with friends , and I will present them below. Let's figure out who friends are, whether they are needed or not.
Who is a true friend
Unsplash The author bases his opinion on the work of journalist Daria Aslamova, “The Adventures of a Mean Girl.” By the way, the work itself is very dubious and does not withstand harsh artistic criticism, but everyone knows the name. You can guess that the book is about the life of a very, very independent female person, whose main advantages can definitely be called courage and healthy selfishness.
Issues of friendship and relationships are also touched upon, and the writer herself spoke about this topic as follows:
“If you don’t want to become someone’s appendage, you need to resort to a cruel and even painful method. I threw away my friends like worn-out shoes as soon as I began to feel that I was losing my will under the influence of their interests.”
Unsplash Daria Aslamova has approximately the same opinion about men: you need to leave before the relationship turns into a tangle of misunderstandings and squabbles. And in general, the writer is accustomed, as she puts it, to taking the best from a person and leaving on time. And there is a certain philosophy in this, but what then to do with friends? Are they really not needed or are they only needed for a short period of time?
Does female friendship exist? Relationships between women are not at all like the partnership of men, especially in adulthood, and finding decent company is also not easy. However, this applies to all genders and ages - good friends do not lie on the road. And if you choose anyone in your circle, you can become the heroine of one of the following stories.
Unsplash Left with nothing. This is a story about how some friends are not averse to taking away someone’s place in life as soon as the opportunity arises. There are often situations when it is a friend who takes away her husband or young man. Women's jealousy is explained by high competition - the spirit of rivalry in relationships between women has not been canceled.
Abel and Cain: female adaptation. It’s about the fact that envy is one of the worst human vices. In friendship it manifests itself as follows: everything is fine as long as friends are on the same level. But as soon as someone becomes more successful, more athletic, or more loved, the friend immediately turns out to be his worst enemy and tries to return everything to its place. And the girlfriend will also sing about the fact that she is trying for the common good . She will give bad advice and secretly hate, just to somehow lower her friend’s suddenly raised bar. Just like in kindergarten.
Unsplash Office Game of Thrones. In work groups, there could be enough gossip and passion for hundreds of exciting novels, if someone were to write them. And sometimes female friendship turns into real parasitism. After all, it’s very convenient to find a simpler girlfriend and load her with additional work. And the more naive the person, the more diligently she tries to help. Unfortunately, such relationships rarely end in something good - you’ll be lucky if they say thank you. And it often happens that instead of a thank you, a friend-assistant receives another portion of gossip behind her back.
But all these situations could happen to anyone. It's easy enough to choose the wrong person . It seems to me that the writer Daria Aslamova, like many other adherents of her opinion, became a victim of human ingratitude. That’s why I lost faith in the power of friendship and bright motives. After all, if you analyze female friendship from a psychological point of view, it turns out that this is simply an irreplaceable thing.
Unsplash What psychologists think about female friendship Man is a social creature, and only a few of us are truly capable of leading an absolutely introverted lifestyle. It is especially important to maintain social connections for women. Because, according to statistics and centuries of evolutionary selection, it is women who maintain social connections between groups the most.
As a girl, friendship is simply irreplaceable. This is a joint knowledge of the world, and light rivalry, and an elbow on which you can lean. But in adulthood, female friendship becomes an integral component for leading a healthy lifestyle.
Unsplash When building our own family, we often begin to delve deeper into our partner. And it begins to seem that we no longer need anyone else. This is where the imbalance occurs.
The fact is that a beloved husband will not always satisfy the need for female communication . Children cannot do this either. For a woman to feel self-sufficient and maintain internal energy, she needs communication with other women. Maybe not best friends, but at least acquaintances or colleagues. A cup of coffee on the weekend, a walk in the park, or visiting a friend for a long heart-to-heart conversation has an amazing therapeutic effect. Besides, who can understand a woman better than another woman?
Please note that representatives of the fair sex, who become withdrawn over the years and devote themselves entirely to home, family and work, as a rule, look very tired. The likelihood of developing depression increases many times over. Libido and interest in the outside world decrease, chronic diseases worsen. Healthy communication is the key to a happy lifestyle.
Unsplash This does not mean that for the sake of your friends you need to give up everything in the world and put them first. But having a circle of close and faithful people with whom you can exchange experiences and emotions is extremely important for any person, not just a woman. Agree?
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