My husband’s sister borrowed a large sum of money from us, and now she refuses to return it, I don’t know what to do.

As one famous English proverb says:borrow “To a friend is to lose him.” Indeed, many businessmen and others always advise not to start doing business with someone close to them. It almost always ends in failure. If not in terms of money, then in terms of relationships between people.



The same goes for Peels relatives. To lend to a person from whom you can not then ask for debt is a hopeless decision. And it may not even be the obvious reasons for refusal. It could be a little deeper than it seemed from the beginning. Let it. But nobody's going to give you back the money. Who makes an officially certified contract with a family member?

Since relatively recently, my sister-in-law and I have been very disliked by each other. And if there is anything for me, she considers herself offended and humiliated. And that's fundamentally wrong. There are other relatives involved in our conflict, but that doesn’t matter anymore. I'm just wondering what this might lead to.



More than a year ago, my sister came to visit us for help. I was out of town, so I didn't find out until a while later. No one could stop or dissuade her husband. And the thing was this: the sister-in-law wanted to finish the renovation in the apartment and for this she did not have a round sum of money. Who should I go to if not my brother? It doesn’t matter that he has his own family and his own expenses.

My husband didn’t say no because we had the money. Not that we were millionaires, but with savings, we were able to raise money every year for a holiday abroad. So we kind of rebooted and we could keep working and treat each other with the same passion and love. It's quite normal practice, I'll tell you.



Having received the necessary amount and promising to give everything up to a penny, the sister-in-law continued to do her repairs. I don't know how her husband let her go. If I were him, I would have thought very carefully before that. However, when we met him, he looked pretty confident, but I will tell you more about it.

Three months have passed. The time for which the husband's sister promised to pay the debt. But there was nothing from her ear or spirit. We were busy with our own business and decided to wait a little longer. But not a month or two later, our beloved relatives did not make us happy with their presence. Then we had to act.

We agreed to meet in a cafe, just in the middle of the way between our houses. This time it was the only one. She said hello, gave a couple of compliments, smiled a lot. It was as if we had met by accident or even as if we had come to her to ask for help.



When the conversation began directly about the case, the sister of her husband reacted as if someone spit in her soul. She twisted, then turned theatrically to her husband and asked if he had forgotten how she had protected her younger brother as a child. How she always stood behind him, and doesn't that mean they're finally even?

It turned out that for her there is no concept of duty at all, if the topic concerns relatives. You see, there's no financial framework in her mind if it's your family. So to give money in this case for her - Moveton. And it wasn't hypocrisy, she really felt that way. The conversation was not glued, we were in shock and I offered to disperse, and at home to think about the situation with my husband. That's what we did.



At the home meeting, it was decided not to give up and get your way. After all, this is not a trifle for us, as I said above, with the help of this money we maintain our mental health and tranquility. We decided to get together in a big company and try to let the whole family of my husband judge us. Maybe only then will the sister-in-law settle down.

But at the big family gathering, we really screwed up. Almost all relatives took the side of the sister-in-law. They started laughing at us, calling us a couple of little crumbs. My mother-in-law reminded me that my husband and his sister were given one room each. And she started asking us when we were going to give our apartment back to her.



Even my sister-in-law's husband, a balding fat man, was throwing something for company, too. The man whose wife asked us for a loan and now didn't want to give it back. Breadwinner, man. In general, we were extreme on all fronts. At least there was no scandal. We were just scolded like a couple of high school students and that's all. But is it better than a normal relationship? I don't even know.

In general, at the moment, about a month has passed from these family “gatherings”. The title hasn't contacted us, obviously she thinks she's right. The husband has already reconciled with everything and only, sighing, joked that this will be an incentive for him to earn the necessary amount for rest by the autumn. This is crazy, I know his salary.



Peels, for my part, I'm all burning inside. Of course, there is no point in going to any court. It was an oral contract between relatives. And even if we get justice, the whole family of our husbands will attack us. The mother-in-law will probably take the apartment. What should I do then? This holiday is an important part of the year without it I will be uncomfortable and hurt.

If you have any thoughts on this, you can safely write. We need brainstorming. I don't want to give money to my sister-in-law. It's against my nature. But fighting with everyone is not an option either. You have to think smarter and wiser. Someone will have a good idea that can be implemented.