My sister knew that I was saving money for my sons to study, she was dragging herself to ask for a large amount of debt.

Who, if not your family, will help you in a difficult time? Most often, faced with material difficulties, we ask for help from loved ones, because we know that they will not refuse us. Sometimes you don't have to ask. When family relationships are trusting, people understand each other in half. But giving money to a relative can cause doubt, because money is not superfluous.

Ksenia now faces a difficult choice: help her sister or secure a future for her children. The sister asked for a favor, but the woman is not sure that she can help her: “I’m not sure I can afford to give my savings to my sister now,” Ksenia admits. However, she doesn’t know what to do without hurting her sister.



Giving money to a relative I raised children myself. My sons and I live in a small town. Sons are teenagers, go by train to the capital to study. I sell dairy products near the subway. I can’t say that we tolerate hardship, live modestly, but at the same time I managed to save a small amount of money in a few years. I understand that in a few years boys will be going to university. And studying now costs a lot, so I started saving up in advance. A rainy day stash won't hurt anyone.



I have regular clients and things are going well. Every night I come home and take care of the cattle. Those who have a household will understand that there is not a minute of rest for the whole day. No weekend. My sons are trying to help me. They please me very much: they manage to study and even attend sports sections. We know that money doesn’t just fall from the sky. We are.

Alice is my little sister. She recently came to visit not just tea, but with an important business. Alice knows I'm saving money for my sons to go to college. I have an unbreakable rule: every month I save a certain amount and never touch it. I'd rather borrow money for food than take a penny for the future for my children.



But Alice, who lives with her mother-in-law in a two-bedroom apartment in the capital, came to me with an unthinkable request. She has three children, her eldest daughter recently married, and there is nowhere to live with her husband, they do not have enough money to rent housing. So my sister decided to borrow money from me to leave a deposit in the bank for an apartment for the newlyweds: “You won’t need the money for the next three years, and until my sons finish school, we will pay off the debt,” I have a jaw cleft.



I was confused when I heard that. Yes, I have saved a decent amount and I know what rented housing is. But is it my job to make my sister's children live? I'm sure years will pass and I won't see my money. Alice always avoids paying her debts. And I'm her sister, and if I ask for a repayment, she'll only resent me.



I work from 5 a.m. to midnight at age 15 to make sure my children are well fed so that they have a better life than I do. My sister is the closest person to me and I can’t say no to her. Now I don't know what to do. I understand her - Alice wants to take care of her daughter's welfare. Only for this she chose the easiest way. I don't know what to say. Said I'd think about it.



On the basis of financial disagreements even between the closest people conflicts arise. It is important not to forget your principles and aspirations. Yes, Alice is a sister. But the motivation to save money for Xenia is clear - to give the sons the opportunity to get higher education and settle in life. On the other hand, you can understand Alice. She also takes care of her daughter. Only one woman is struggling to earn a livelihood and does not ask anyone for help. And the second decides that the sister has to help.

When it comes to money, people often switch to personalities, trying to press on weaknesses to get what they want. Here it is important to have restraint and explain your position clearly and clearly, even if it does not coincide with the worldview of the native person. What would you do in a situation like this?