From the young mother's blog: "Isn't you a bad mother?" I'll tell you what. Bashny.Net

“Very often in forums where mothers live, you can get involved in fierce pot wars. Yes, so serious that everyone for a long time forgets about evil mother-in-law and walking husbands. It is amusing to see how grown-up educated women measure up, whose child gave in to training faster, and friendly peck at those who, for example, are against early potty training, the young mother writes in her blog, and our editorial office is unable to pass by.





Feeling guilty is quite a normal tradition among domestic mothers, and there are no reasons to obey on your fingers. Did you give birth and go to work? What a mother you are! You got in shape fast? You're no mother. Guilty, guilty and guilty again!

Editorial "Site" He believes that guilt is useless and destructive, especially when it comes to motherhood. We are sharing with you some of the blog posts of a young mother whose parenting worthy of attention. It is important to read not only new parents, but also their “caring” relatives!

Paternity and maternity

1. I'm not a mother!
   It seems that every self-respecting mother is simply obliged, having given birth to a child, to suffer with him to death. Why? Yes, to spend the rest of his life blaming the unhappy baby for every sleepless night, unrealized dream or spent a penny. You are not a mother, and there are no other scenarios. As soon as the daughter was six months old, everyone considered it his duty to ask: “Are you already getting used to potting?” Nope? How? After all, it will be too late to go to school in diapers! Yes, I removed my daughter’s day diapers at 2 years old, night diapers at 3, and during this time I have already earned the status of a lazy mother. And it doesn’t matter that the daughter of this laziest mom in the world still points to the yogurt and asks, “What is that?” Because that lazy mom always cooked it herself.
   
   
   
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   One of my friends was stuffed, they say, she does not walk with the baby, but puts a cradle on the balcony, doing her own business. Another is that she got in shape too quickly after giving birth. If she was exhausted, with bags under her eyes and a dirty head (you are a mother, you do not even have time to look in the mirror), she would be amicably sorry, hugged and recommended a good tea to improve lactation. She's a mother, not a woman, not a successful entrepreneur, not an athlete. Mother...
   
   
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2. The whole country does that, and you have to!
   We immediately stigmatize those who are not within the system, and motherhood is no exception. Breastfeeding, potty training, the absence or presence of a nanny are all controlled by a system that is tantamount to desertion. “Your mother did it, Grandma, the whole country does it, and you should!”
   
   
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3. And here in our time...
   “The older generation, our grandmothers, and even our mothers, are so used to hardship that they live by inertia according to the scheme of sacrifice for the sake of sacrifice, involuntarily telling us that we live too well. It is a pity that you raised children during the difficult years of wars and perestroika, that you raised sons and daughters alone and without support, that you survived and managed to find good things in conditions of total shortage. But the fact that we have lived in a different reality should not breed a sense of guilt for owning diapers and baby monitors.”
   
   
   
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   Yeah, it used to be different. Many of us would not have survived to adulthood in the era of the lack of antibiotics, someone in the field gave birth, and in general there were no allergies, and now we live – we do not worry about anything. “There used to be ... And now, pampering! But does it make sense to be overwhelmed by this fact?
   
   
   
   
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4. Guilt is a sense of worthlessness
   “You play little with a child. You're not really interested in him at all. He's coughing again. I bought a penny syrup instead of advertised, but I bought new shoes. I left it on the mat, and you wash your head. I did not speak to my stomach during pregnancy.” Sometimes the feeling of guilt takes on quite outlandish forms, but it is the most insignificant of feelings, inspired from the outside, destructive and useless.
   
   
   
   The feeling of guilt carries nothing but destruction. Do not give in to this emotion, but learn to draw conclusions, set priorities and stick to your own chosen strategy. Guilt from the outside is something you need to protect yourself from immediately! “I paint my nails because I want to. I take a nanny - I want to and have the opportunity. I went to work because I have strength and desire. It didn’t work out because you have the strength and desire to devote all your time to the child.”
   
   
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Society should understand that the mother owes only to the child, and then only until his adulthood. And mothers need to realize that everything motherhood imposed from the outside. No matter how difficult it may be, take a few deep breaths, smile at your reflection in the mirror and boldly go on the path of motherhood that you have chosen.

If you share this young mom’s point of view, be sure to share it with your friends!