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Why not live with your spouse’s family
Marriage means not only a stamp in the passport, but also the difficulties that the newlyweds will overcome together from now on. The first difficulty is finding housing. It is good if one of you has wealthy parents and their wedding gift will be the purchase of an apartment. But the lucky ones are much less than we would like.
Then the first and most rash decision is to live with the parents of the spouse. “So money should not be spent on rented housing, and parents will help if anything,” you naively think. No matter how beautiful your parents are, never create a family under their wing. It is better to postpone the wedding or spend money on rented housing, believe me.
A special relationship develops between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and if husbands did not live with mother-in-law, where would the jokes come from? It’s funny to listen until you’re in that situation. And then the anecdote turns into a cruel reality, and there is no laughing matter. Living with her husband's family This is not the beauty of family life, but the utter darkness. It is not a matter of crampedness - the house can be three-story, but the hostess in it is always only one!
The daughter-in-law will not be able to realize herself as a full-fledged hostess, because she is on foreign territory. You have to listen to the opinion of the mother-in-law, to carry out her instructions, so as not to offend. Mom is older, she knows what to do, she has more experience, so she will teach how to do it.
There are two reasons for the discontent of the mother-in-law: she has ceased to be the main woman in her son’s life, and this very hurts the mother’s feelings, she is dissatisfied with the choice of her son. And the son is young, how he chooses a good bride for himself. When her mother-in-law thinks so, she forgets in these seconds that she married for love 20 years ago and did not listen to anyone.
Relationships deteriorate not only between daughter-in-law and mother-in-law, but also in a young family. The husband does not want to get between his wife and mother, and often he lets the conflict take its course to avoid being extreme. It might seem that Husband does not participate in family lifeBut he doesn’t, he just doesn’t want to create conflict. Marriage can not only suffer due to constant fighting, it can collapse!
If there is any opportunity to avoid moving to your husband’s house, use it. But if there is no alternative in the near future, then this woman can be softened.
Your mother-in-law is also a human being, so you don’t have to make her a monster who deliberately tries to destroy your family. It takes a lot of patience to get to know her, because with this person you are connected for the whole married life.
Tell your friends how to get along with your mother-in-law.
Then the first and most rash decision is to live with the parents of the spouse. “So money should not be spent on rented housing, and parents will help if anything,” you naively think. No matter how beautiful your parents are, never create a family under their wing. It is better to postpone the wedding or spend money on rented housing, believe me.
A special relationship develops between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and if husbands did not live with mother-in-law, where would the jokes come from? It’s funny to listen until you’re in that situation. And then the anecdote turns into a cruel reality, and there is no laughing matter. Living with her husband's family This is not the beauty of family life, but the utter darkness. It is not a matter of crampedness - the house can be three-story, but the hostess in it is always only one!
The daughter-in-law will not be able to realize herself as a full-fledged hostess, because she is on foreign territory. You have to listen to the opinion of the mother-in-law, to carry out her instructions, so as not to offend. Mom is older, she knows what to do, she has more experience, so she will teach how to do it.
There are two reasons for the discontent of the mother-in-law: she has ceased to be the main woman in her son’s life, and this very hurts the mother’s feelings, she is dissatisfied with the choice of her son. And the son is young, how he chooses a good bride for himself. When her mother-in-law thinks so, she forgets in these seconds that she married for love 20 years ago and did not listen to anyone.
Relationships deteriorate not only between daughter-in-law and mother-in-law, but also in a young family. The husband does not want to get between his wife and mother, and often he lets the conflict take its course to avoid being extreme. It might seem that Husband does not participate in family lifeBut he doesn’t, he just doesn’t want to create conflict. Marriage can not only suffer due to constant fighting, it can collapse!
If there is any opportunity to avoid moving to your husband’s house, use it. But if there is no alternative in the near future, then this woman can be softened.
- Denial Don’t discuss your husband’s behavior with his mother, as a woman will understand you, but motherly feelings will prevail, and then she will judge you and dislike you. And in a conflict situation, your mother-in-law will remember all the revelations you shared with her, and with her husband. It's not far before the divorce.
- Anger. Find out what is the order of cleaning, cooking, washing in this house. When you understand what your mother-in-law is used to doing, it will be easier to adjust and, if you want, help her. But in any case, do not force yourself to help, every woman has her own rules in the kitchen: some do not like someone to get under the hands. In that case, wait, then cook whatever you want.
- Trading. It is important to discuss household affairs directly with his mistress to make life easier for both himself and her. You can distribute duties: do a cleaning schedule or a sequence of washing, time in the kitchen. If you think it's stupid that you're a grown woman and you don't have to coordinate your actions with anyone, then you're deeply mistaken. In your husband’s family, you are a guest who can be cleaned and cooked sometimes. Rough, but true.
- Depression Be prepared that if you go to work and your mother-in-law doesn’t, she will judge you for it. You don't clean enough, you don't iron your husband's things, you don't make him fresh soup, he has to finish yesterday's, and all that. If your mother-in-law doesn’t tell you that, she tells her husband or son. It's gonna be hard either way.
- Adoption But if you're willing to do anything for your beloved spouse, eventually, I hope you get along with your mother-in-law. The longer you live with her, the easier it is to get used to. Of course, the opinion is subjective, but judging by observations and personal experience, it seems objective.
Your mother-in-law is also a human being, so you don’t have to make her a monster who deliberately tries to destroy your family. It takes a lot of patience to get to know her, because with this person you are connected for the whole married life.
Tell your friends how to get along with your mother-in-law.
