In the yard we have a tough period. Difficult for men and women. Each in their own way. Each of us has their own test, their own exams, their own recipes. And what is important for women during the crisis? Anyone – not only economic but also personal, and professional?Not to stop desiring. Under any circumstances.
Here the crisis in the yard, no money... And that makes the woman? Is clamped. Not only in the realization of their desires, but the desires as such.
It is not simply buying a dress — she pretends that the dress doesn't. And actually temporarily "disables" your ability to desire, so as not to irritate myself or my husband. She does it quickly. The experience is still there.
We have already experienced so many crises, learned how to shrink instinctively. Instantly. Times. Imploded, shrunk. Has renounced desires, plans, huddled in the hole, they say, I even have gifts for the New year is not necessary, everything is so difficult, and money from us a little, and suddenly there... the Best gift – it's a TV show and Olivier. The husband asks what I want, the answer is – nothing. Myself convinced of it masterfully. She will believe anything she needed. What can we say about her husband.Even if the crisis has not touched her family, she still just in case "rashochetsya" those gifts have dreamed of. Why would I want a ring, - rings, and Bali will not go, because the dollar rose as much. Don't know, what have we and what have the dollar. But everywhere is a crisis, so it's time to "collapse". Just in case. You never know what.
It's easier to survive when not distracted by all the "extra", only the most necessary. It is not necessary to decide where to spend money and time – only priority. All the base needed not included, extra. And the list is like this – light, buckwheat, diapers and pasta. Of course, there will not sneak no dress, no Bridal shower, no trip to the sea. They clearly belong to the category "Extra". So, throw away without regret.
So not much to worry about, the woman does not just postpone his desire to "sometime later", she did it strike out, erase, destroy. To not tormented her and tortured her husband. From good intentions. Which is paved road you know where.
That's what we learned in childhood: examples from mom on their own. As during the crisis in the house had gone food like mom with tears in his eyes darned my nylon tights, as this is the second year for the event wore the same dress, and Santa Claus brought us instead of dolls sneakers for physical education. Because the doll is unnecessary.
We have learned to live without desires, learned to survive, learned extra "shrink". But something we forgot. Something we never learned. To live.Desire is characteristic of our life!
Because of woman's desire is a reflection of its "liveliness". If she's alive, the desire is there. If desires no she a "zombie". Desires can be different, not necessarily dress or travel, they are not always strictly material. The desire to walk in the Park, feed the squirrels, re-hang curtains, move the Cabinet, go to visit... is the nature of women. Clamping your desires, you clamp their feminine nature. And then you long to wonder where it all went and why. Do you know how many women I meet who do not know what they want, and so torment themselves and their loved ones?
To have desires is not to demand their execution immediately. It does not mean that without all this you are unhappy and sad. To have desires is to acknowledge their right to want.
To recognize their right to be alive and real. Sincere.
Have desires does not mean being miserable sinner, who can not renounce all material. The horror, shame and sin! Should the destiny of mankind to think, and her new earrings! But the woman is not able and does not have to be a hermit and ascetic. Born a woman, you are by default associated with the material side of life firmly and permanently. Then why try to get rid of what is your nature?
If the woman in question: "What do you want?" to answer more than a couple minutes, something is wrong. Alive and real woman almost immediately says she wants to eat, sleep, bath, get a massage, hair cut, to go see my mom... or at least think, voicing only one thing. And to be happy can only a living woman. Zombies will be able to survive, but to live anymore.
I know a girl who told everyone that really wants to get married. It is absolutely clear that marriage she does not want. But there was a man, very decent, started to care. What? For five years she's tormenting yourself and him. Because he's good, you have to take, and the kind of marriage you do not want. And what she wants in this situation she doesn't know. The past five years. A man is not to be envied.
Do you know what you want? Do you have desires? Or did you already throw them in the garbage, to pretend that nothing happened? And not lost if you are with them a part of their feminine essence?
Let's change our "crisis programs"? Offered here is a crisis management plan:1. A living woman is better than comfortable.
With some part, the woman does not need anything. She's not necessary, and therefore do it for nothing. A short distance to look at it. But long-distance "zombies", who wants nothing, is more expensive.
Zombies can not only desire, but also to experience the feelings. Feelings she had locked together with the desires. And like at home rustling is preparing, and that is not so. She is paralyzed on the inside, whether frozen, whether under mental anesthesia, whether in a lethargic sleep. And just do not understand what is wrong. It's annoying. And those who come to her for warmth, and goes even more frozen. And those who want to stay alive near the mummy.
Yes, and the woman to be dead hard. A living also not easy – you have to live feelings and desires, to accept, to love, to forgive. Disabling the entire unit easy again for a short distance. In a long life journey she will be unbearably lonely, painful and difficult. She can't be happy, love. Even for this you first have to want. What's it like to want? She doesn't remember.2. Our desire to create opportunities for men
In a crisis there are opportunities for our men. A lot. For growth and development. For new businesses, for new horizons. This is an opportunity to reborn in the sphere of its activities, to change. Much to start from scratch. But they could take advantage of these opportunities, next to them should be happy and inspired by women. Women who take care of themselves, have the desire and are not clamped with fear. And who believe in their ability even in a crisis. Women who have the desire and are able with their wishes to contact. To be happy in any case.
Going to Bali is great! Don't go here too well. And I? I want to Bali. Looks like the wording wishes happy women. Whatever it touched. Then the man loses his fear and can act. Because otherwise it is too great a burden – to become the sorrow of his beloved and to become not-man in his own eyes.
If there is no possibility right now to get what you want is not a reason to give up. Just put your wish in a box "someday, when the opportunity arises". Do not assume their desire is bad, if it came at a difficult time for you or your husband period. The desire is always good. Man its so say I want, but not right now. Ever. When you get a chance. I am now well, and then all will be well. But he will believe you only if you do it inside so it will all get a feel for it.3. No desire comes to us without the ability to implement it.
That is, the possibility of implementing the desired is already incorporated in the desire. Just often you need to wait. How long to wait depends on the size of your desire. Sometimes it will not come quite in the form you were expecting. My friend wanted to go to Bali, but did not succeed. And one day her wish came true, but she went there to shoot a movie and not sit on the beach. Although, of course, in the end have combined useful and pleasant.
If you want a new dress so your husband can get you to buy it. May not be this month and next. Maybe not red and green. Not this brand, another. Maybe it will be even better than you dream of now. Maybe it will be exactly the same – and wait for you on sale in your size. No one knows how it will come true.
All things are possible. Recently all the world gathered for the operation a little boy. The Euro grew faster than was collected, the amount was huge. In the last day it was unreal the amount of six million. And gathered after all. Almost seven. So don't hesitate. All things are possible. All real. And relax on this topic.4. Write down the desires – this will help them to let go
The more you on something fixated, the more difficult endeavor. And the harder you have to live with it. Constant monitoring – true, not true, when, how, why...
Desires are feminine by nature – so they are flexible as we are also not able to exist in total control and constant pressure. Loosen his grip. Relax. And write down all your desires on paper.
When we write a list of a hundred desires, we not only develop your ability to desire. We even let them out of your head. Free the space your life from the hundreds of little "won'ts" that prevent us to sleep.
Write your own list. In it you will be able to find his solace – once written, can not worry — there is. In it you will be able much understand. For example, is not your desires that you spend a lot of effort and nerves, and they never come true.
Attempt to replace your desire strangers – it's also the sign of our "paralysis". It's easier. Said I want, now I want to. What to wish? Let there be a machine in this movie, the house Masha and the grandchildren for my mom, which she wants. So gather up desires. But her they? And whether there is in them some force, energy? Or they are paralyzed, artificially glued and others?
The power of life is only in your desires that come from your heart. They are when they come true — make you a little happier.
And no someone else's desire, byvshii will not make you nicer, even gram.5. Oduhotvoryaet their desires
Another dangerous trap with desires to become their slave. When they are controlling you, not you them. When the whole life becomes a pursuit of sense gratification and nothing more.
Desire is great. But desires are different. And besides the desire to have something, is to learn how to desire and the other. For example, to be somebody. Not just to have children and become a mother. Not just to have a husband and be a good wife. And so on.
And there's a category desires to "learn." To learn how to embroider, knit, cook, sing, dance. This is a great desire, because they develop your inner world and always be with you, does not depreciate and do not expire.
And there are also desires to give. For example, to help some child, to take home an orphan, help build a temple, to create a center of assistance to people. And so on.
Do you have such desires? Desires that can change your life and lift it to a higher moral level?
Just not necessary in this case to strike out a new dress, I beg you. Help sick children does not conflict with what you want to be beautiful. Both of these desires can exist simultaneously, and nothing terrible in this.
If you are a nun, you should not live only for others. And who you will be able to illuminate the path if you spare the money to change my light bulb? Find your balance between desires for himself and desires to others.
Here's a turnaround plan. Agree? Then the cause – helping men to realize their potential, achieving our small and big desires, dreaming of better world and herself written, over-the-counter... And remember, right? Remain happy in any case. published
Author: Olga Valyaeva