Today was talking about that everything needs to "deserve it". But if you have something without a particular reason, you appropriated it dishonestly, you are a fraud and an impostor. Who determines whether you earned it or not? Anyone, but not yourself. Sam-are you sure that you do not deserve: no respect for yourself or the office to which you are or the money you pay. Someone should take a closer look closely — and everything, everything will quickly realize that you're right it isn't... the Idea that everything, literally everything you need to "earn" anything to have "just so", found in almost all spheres of life.
Love must be earned; the right to call themselves, for example, a psychologist or a journalist must be earned, not just on the basis of professional education and related professional activities. The idea "must be earned" in hiding like the Russian doll, one more: "nothing should be easy, everything should be paid for hard work, sweat and blood." "Earn" = "vestrada". If this idea sits somewhere deep, that the easier something is, the less we feel right to rejoice.
Very topic today were the words of the famous writer Neil Gaiman:
"I was obsessive fantasy: knocking on the door, I'm going to open, and there stands a man in a suit — cheap, ordinary men's suit, in what is supposed to go to work in the office. The man in the hands of a clipboard with a sheet of paper. He says: "Hello, I'm on official business. Is that you Neil Gaiman?" I answer: "Yes." He said: "this I have here says that you're a writer, and that you don't need to get up to a certain hour, you just sit down and write as much as you want." And I answer: "Yes, that's right." "And that you enjoy. And it says that any books you want to read, you send just. And movie here you can watch free movie. What you want to do this you need to call the main film enthusiast". And I answer "Yes". And then he says, "Well, unfortunately, you brought to clean water. Now we know about you. And now you have to get a real job". At this place I always fell heart. I said "okay", go buy a cheap suit and began to apply for all sorts of normal operation. Because, once you're exposed, nothing can be done" Here they are — these beliefs, not giving the opportunity to take over something good and to be identified with him:
- If you get pleasure from work — it's not fair, you have to suffer. Only suffering gives permission for the assignment of the fruits of labor.
— If something comes easily — too unfair, must be hard. Something that comes easy, it is impossible to assign. You have talent, and something in comparison to people without talent? Shame on you. You're a handsome man/beautiful woman, and you are given much easier? Be ashamed of its benefits, repent, make excuses — remember, they don't deserve. And even better — ourselves't mess up, and will be entitled for leniency. - If you have quickly achieved recognition, at least something is also wrong, accords recognition to the end of life, or even better, after death. But if people began to respect you before you have time to die — this is because all deceived. The genius of deceit. You really have nothing to offer people just what you can do to throw dust in the eyes. This, of course, impostor syndrome is not limited. But I was thinking about how should be unhappy, torn by envy and hatred the same internal object that whispers in the soul of these "wonderful" ideas that only sweat, blood and tears are the justification for your existence on Earth. He was even sorry. If you can take. Then listen to do not want more. And he might talk about something completely different
Author: Ilya Latypov