What not to say to the man when he's sick

When Deborah Orr was diagnosed with cancer, the support of her friends proved invaluable, but she also learned that there are things you should never say to a sick person.
Let's see, what kind words.

"I really feel sorry for you"

Strangely, some people believe that when you wish you feel this great. Don't tell my eyes: "I feel sorry for you". Also the hand does not need to say the same. When you Pat on the thigh or gently put a hand on him and whisper something in the ear or in the head, I want to hit whoever's doing this. Better to say: "I would like and that you are spared unpleasant days." Thus in the sick person you acknowledge a reasonable person, an active participant in their own drama, and not a momentary helpless victim.

"If anyone is going to beat it, then it's you"is very Funny, but a bit I find comforting is when you say that you have to engage in battle with his disease like no one medieval knight from adventure novel. To submit to medicine in the hope of healing is all that is needed. The idea that illness is a test of character, with rehabilitation as a reward for a strong spirit, almost insulting. Why not say: "my mother was like 20 years ago, and now she's in Bengal you're travelling with an acrobatic circus." But if not, then do not say.

"You look healthy"

It is unlikely the patient will like, when he was acting as though do not notice the obvious. In any case it is impossible to be so sick, not to look in the mirror and not see his face, similar to the full yellow moon, obryzga from steroids, with Panda eyes, thanks to a strong and effective medicine against breast cancer called Docetaxel. I knew that look and feel like a man-one foot in the grave. Nobody likes mocking taunts, which is discouraged and speaking and listening. If your aching friend wants to discuss her appearance, she will ask you what you think about it. It will be a direct question, so spare her of your "promoters".

"You look terrible"

I know that it may seem unlikely, but many really felt the need to certify me in that deplorable condition, which was obvious. On the other hand, when I ask, "do I look awful?", – so I'm asking people to help make fun of me, what most makes.

"I should be sure to check on you"

Don't say these words, say, when you have then to do a real revolution in your busy working schedule, trying in vain to find a suitable "window", because to visit the patient is extremely important for you business. I sat in the ward of chemotherapy with a large catheter on hand and received messages like: "I'll try to find time this week", not unimas after my SMS exhortations: "Let's better next time." I like it when people ask: "Can I visit you after work tonight?" or even better: "I Have tickets to the theater on the 25th. Let me know that day if you'll be able to go there with me."

источник:rus-health.info

Source: /users/1077