Fifty five million four hundred forty thousand four hundred thirty five
Pregnant. Here it is. Clear as day! Two blue stripes on a newly purchased pregnancy test.
I double checked…
One stripe = not pregnant.
Two lines = pregnant.
Op, I'm definitely pregnant.
His heart was pounding.
His head was spinning.
In the stomach, something turned over.
I was worried, was nervous, scared and excited at the same time.
Is this really happening! For many years I dreamed of, preparing, waiting for this day and finally. I'm a mother.
I hardly imagined that in a short nine months, I will embark on the grueling, full of change, excitement, indescribable but happy way of life.
For nine months, I first hand know the price of motherhood. I knew exactly what it's like to be a mother. And I fully understand and appreciate the beautiful woman I call MOM.
I learned that I feel moms, but their children know very little about it.
Thirteen million two hundred thirty four thousand one hundred ninety five
Here is a list of 10 things your mom never told you.
She was crying because of you... a lot. She cried when she found out she was pregnant. She cried when she gave birth to you. She cried when she first held you in his arms. She was crying from happiness. She was crying from fear. She cried from worry. She was crying because she loves you so much. She felt your pain and your joy and have shared them with you, whether you meant it or not.
She wanted to eat the last piece of pie. But when she saw you look at him with her big eyes and licking lips tiny tongue, she was unable to eat it. She knew that she will be much happier when your little tummy is full, but not her.
It hurts. When you pulled her hair, it hurt; when you grabbed her handles with sharp fingernails that were impossible to cut, it hurt; when you bit her while she breast fed you, it was also painful. You kicked her in the stomach, has not yet been born; you stretched her stomach for nine months; her body shuddered from the agonizing pain when she helped you see the light.
She was always afraid. From the moment of conception, she did everything to protect you. She became your mother. She was the same lady who gave a neighbor girl to hold you on hands because, in her opinion, no one except her could not ensure your safety. Her heart sank when you made the first steps. She went to bed to make sure that you are okay and came home and she woke up early to take you to school. At the slightest failure, she was there; she was ready to catch you every time you had a bad dream or when you have late night was the temperature. She was there to know that you're okay.
She knows she's not perfect. She is the harshest critic of herself. She knows all my faults and sometimes hates herself for them. When it comes to you, it is merciless to himself. She wanted to be the perfect mom, to do everything right, but because she too is human, she made mistakes. Maybe she's still trying to forgive myself for them. She wholeheartedly wanted to turn back time and do everything differently, but she can't. So be kind to her and know that she was doing everything she could.
She looked at you when you slept. There were nights when she stayed up until three and prayed that you finally fell asleep. Her eyes were closed while she was singing you a lullaby, and she asked you: "please, Please, go to sleep." And then when you finally fell asleep, she tucked you in at night, and all her fatigue disappeared somewhere in that moment, when she sat down next to you, staring at your angelic face and felt such love, whose existence she had not even suspected. Despite the fact that she had fallen off the hands and eyes hurt.
She carried you a lot longer than nine months. She was you need. And she was there. She learned to keep you on the handles, simultaneously cleans the apartment; she learned to keep you on the handles while she ate; she held your hand even in a dream, because at times it was almost the only opportunity to sleep, which was available to her. Hands tired, back ached, but she still held your hand because you wanted to be with her. She hugged, kissed, loved. Played you. You were calm in her arms; you were happy in her arms; did you know that you are loved, when she was holding your hand. And she held, as much as you wanted.
Every time you cried, her heart breaking. The saddest sound was your crying, and the most horrifying sight — tears on your little face. She did everything in her power to make you stop crying, and when she did not, her heart was broken into a million little pieces.
You for it in the first place. She was without food, without showers and without sleep. She always put your needs above his own. She spent the day doing what you want, and by the end of the day she has no strength left for yourself. But the next day she woke up, and did the same thing again and again, because you mean so much to her.
All this she would repeat again. Being a mom is one of the most difficult works, and at times it brings a person to the very limit of patience. You cry, you hurt, you try, you fail, you work and you learn. But you are experiencing more joy than seemed possible and feel more love than your heart can hold. Despite all the pain, bitterness, sleepless nights, early rises, which were held with you, your mom, she would do it all for you again and again because, in her opinion, you deserve it. So when you next see her, tell her thank you, let her know that you love her. These words will never her a lot.